Posted by ElaineM on January 21, 2007, at 15:57:33
In reply to Re: helping, posted by Dr. Bob on January 21, 2007, at 14:16:11
>>>>>>Sorry about making this even more complicated. Would "broken record mode" feel like pressure?
Not unless all versions of it were considered as such - but that'd be impossible. People repeat statements of upset in threads, and people repeat statements in threads.
In terms of your example, it sounds a little different once you include the possible inbetween lines.
>>>>>I'm sorry you're feeling so bad, we care about you and want the best for you, and please go see someone IRL.
Don't want to take your advice. I want to take this bottle of pills. I'm so upset. I don't want to live.
>>>>>>I'm sorry you're feeling so bad, we care about you and want the best for you, and please go see someone IRL.
Don't want to take your advice. I want to take this bottle of pills. I'm so upset. I don't want to live.
>>>>>>I'm sorry you're feeling so bad, we care about you and want the best for you, and please go see someone IRL.
Don't want to take your advice. I want to take this bottle of pills. I'm so upset. I don't want to live.
>>>>>>I'm sorry you're feeling so bad, we care about you and want the best for you, and please go see someone IRL.
Don't want to take your advice. I want to take this bottle of pills. I'm so upset. I don't want to live.
>>>>>>I'm sorry you're feeling so bad, we care about you and want the best for you, and please go see someone IRL.
Don't want to take your advice. I want to take this bottle of pills. I'm so upset. I don't want to live.
I think it'd have to somehow go both ways. Without seeing it as such, you'd have to make arbitrary characterizations of the distress tone in people's words. See the problem I have is that, when saying that suggesting the appropriate thing to do (which you agreed to, or at least that it wasn't inappropriate) when an individual is suicidal or talking of overdose, is pressuring, it suggests that posters engaging in advice broken-record-mode feel a less signigicant type of upset or hurt, than broken record distress posters. Would it come down to who could write the most emotional prose? I mean, how could that be judged?
>>>>>>If you were feeling really distressed, what would you want a friend to do?
Again, "really distressed" or suicidal/talking of overdose?
If I was the latter, and I only had phone or computer contact with this friend (they couldn't reach me or intervene in person), then I'd expect any rational person to call my parents to come to my place, or call the police, if I refused to take care of myself in a similar way -- especially if I'd ever carried it out before. I'd hope my friend would think that my life/health is worth saving and react according to the level of seriousness my distress merited. And I think they would make a call to someone cause they'd know that I didn't take such things lightly, and they probably would be scared sh*tless that I was talking in such extremes. I think that not being able to be with someone IRL makes a significant difference to the situation, and limits possible responses.My friend would also probably really push for me to call my pdoc if I was ever that distressed regularily so that they could experience my state first hand. If anything I assume they'd also want to make sure that my pdoc always knew how often my mood swung in that direction so that medication, or the frequency of sessions could be titrated. They would want me to do what was best (in the short term, but also the long term) for my mental and physical health.
Once I was in a more lucid state, I'd actually expect my friend to always advise that I involve my T and/or pdoc in my suicidal tendencies and vacilating emotions. Plus, I'm sure my friend would be uncomfortable and feel overwhelmed if they ended up being the repeated keeper of my mortality - I wouldn't be shocked if they'd want to shift the burden to someone more capable. For my benefit and theirs.[However, if I'd "only" said that I was so sad, and never felt lonelier in my life, was afraid I was gonna get fired from my job, was having a fight with my significant other, couldn't stop crying my eyes out....etc..... then I'd expect my friend to listen with open ears, talk me through it, perhaps offer a bit of advice or anecdote, make plans to get together with me in person, try to make me laugh a little, whatnot. But that's not what we're talking about here.]
El
poster:ElaineM
thread:724710
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20061228/msgs/724867.html