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Re: why i think we shouldn't interveane

Posted by alexandra_k on October 15, 2005, at 20:24:30

In reply to trigger***, posted by holymama on October 15, 2005, at 20:11:18

back to the issue...

i think it is a really hard decision to have to make.

there are 4 possible outcomes:

1) if you interveane it is possible that the person will be grateful later. will appreciate that.

2) if you interveane it is possible that the person will resent that later. will not appreciate that.

3) if you do not interveane it is possible that the person will die. and that if they had been prevented from that - they may have gone on to be grateful that they were prevented.

I guess that is the worst case scenario.
and why... there is the urge to be 'better safe than sorry'

4) if you do not interveane it is possible that the person will go on to deal with it okay themselves or get the help they need irl themselves.

I guess that i think...

that deneb posts her thoughts on suicide a fair bit.
she does seem to get into that place fairly often.
then she tends to come right...
and be happy. happy to be alive.

so i guess thats why people think it would be a bad decision for her to die.

but with respect to intervention...

if someone makes her go to hospital she will be resentful about other people making her do things. and if she feels that way... it is unlikely to be helpful.

the situation is likely to recurr...

if we interveane this time then...
how many times will we need to keep doing this?

how much better to support her best we can
into getting the help she needs herself.
then she can feel like it is her decision and she can feel empowered with respect to her life.
she will have done something positive toward helping herself. and that will be something to be proud of. whereas if we do this for her... she will likely resent it.

because... we can't save her.
but... people can help her if she takes steps to help herself.

 

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