Posted by gardenergirl on October 24, 2004, at 16:35:38
In reply to Re: Are these not I statements? » gardenergirl, posted by alesta on October 24, 2004, at 1:22:05
> gg, honestly, you would not be hurt and offended if jai said that to you? come on..yes, all our feelings are our own, that is immaterial. just because someone shaped some hurtful words into "I statements" doesn't make them okay. i guarantee you'd have some issues with Jai if she said that to you.
>
> amyAmy,
Thanks for your interest in this. Honestly, I may feel hurt by someone saying something similar to what Jai said, but if the person used an "I" statement, my hurt is my own, and their feelings are their own. I would not blame my feelings on the other person. I might express them to the other person using "I" statements, or I may just hide out and hurt. Hopefully I would do the former.I think if I were on the receiving end of what Jai posted, I would want to know more about why she felt sickened. I would be concerned that there was a misunderstanding, a genuine problem, or something else going on. Perhaps it's the T training in me. You hear a lot of things, and you have to make sure you understand what belongs to whom.
Not that I'm perfect at it by any means...
gg
>
poster:gardenergirl
thread:406152
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20041012/msgs/406709.html