Posted by Miller on April 8, 2003, at 20:31:02
In reply to Lou's respomse to miller's post-LR » Miller, posted by Lou Pilder on April 8, 2003, at 19:54:24
Hi Lou,
It is so good to hear from you again. I have missed you.
To answer your question, yes. When I first got to the social board, I gave very inappropriate advise. It wasn't meant as that at all. The person I was responding to was a very well-liked established poster.
I felt I was attacked by everyone. Not becaue I was a bad guy (Althoughsome wondered) but because they were protecting the poster they knew and cared about. At that time it could have gotten really ugly.
I was hurt. Everyone else was offended. The person I was responding to never responded due to the horrible depression she was having, making everyone more nervous.
But you know what? I was able to explain what I had meant. I truly never wanted to endanger someone. Every apologized for attacking me. It all ended "happily ever after".
In fact, it brought me closer to a lot of people. More than that it has enabled me to be more sensitive to how I say things and what I say.
I would be devastated if those people would have requested me not to post to them. I couldn't have stayed a member of the board. One, because my feelings would have been hurt. Two because I would have nobody to post to. And finally, because of the humiliation I would have suffered.
One thing Dr. Bob has forgotten is that in order for someone to request a "no post to me please from a certain individual" is that it is on the message line for everyone to read. I, myself, pick and choose what I read. I do so by reading the message lines. By it's very nature, a message like that is almost uncivil. It brings tears to my eyes even thinking about how much that could hurt our members that have trouble socializing as it is. Why restrict them more than they do themselves? Why allow people with low self-esteem to be put into a public display of humiliation?
I am sorry that I went off on a tangent. I am hoping there is a better solution. There has to be.
-Miller
poster:Miller
thread:217512
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20030404/msgs/217567.html