Posted by Meatwood_Flack on January 2, 2013, at 20:09:31
Happy New Year, everyone!
As of this month, I have been battling a what seems to be a severe, melancholic (endogenous) depression for a year, with no relief despite trying several different medications and combos of meds. I have tried Zoloft (all the way to 150 mg with no changes other than a half dozen afternoons over the space of three weeks where I felt much better from about 4 p.m. until bedtime), Effexor (all the way to five weeks at 120 mg. when it was replaced by Cymbalta in hospital last summer), Cymbalta (all the way up to 120 mg. and remained on this for several months with no relief), Cymbalta was augmented with Abilify (up to 5 mg.), Wellbutrin (at 150 mg.) and Lamictal (up to 100 mg.). Was also on the following for sleep: Trazodone (now at 150 mg., my second round with this med), Atarax (2550 mg.), Quietapine (100 mg. for both sleep and depression, discontinued due to some myoclonic jerks) and Clonazapam (I believe 10 mg., which my regular pnurse discontinued as soon as I was released from hospital. Am now going into week three of 20 mg. Prozac and just titrated Wellbutrin up to 300 mg. I've read that SSRI drugs perform about as well as placebos except in cases of severe depression, where the placebo effect basically disappears. Between my readings about various drugs on PubMed and writings by Breggin, Whitaker, Szasz, it's all quite confusing. I have also read that 30 percent of depressed patients don't respond to anything. I'm wondering if the placebo effect has been overstated, as lots of people seem to find relief from these drugs, and I suppose part of me wishes I could find out, definitively, that my condition is not of biological origin and is, therefore, amenable to other avenues, such as talk therapy, diet or exercise. My new psychiatrist wanted to try Prozac because my father found depression relief with this medication for his own, long-standing depression, which makes sense in a way, but he is also hesitant to prescribe tricyclics because, "A week's supply can kill you." I replied that, previous to my depression, I was an active and occasionally gigging musician and, as such, had numerous instrument and microphone cables that could be just as lethal, aside from the fact that if the TCA worked, there would be no impetus for self destruction. My symptoms are depressed mood that is nonreactive and improves somewhat by night (worse in the morning) anergia, lack of appetite, insomnia, anhedonia (one of the worst symptoms, as my music and writing have basically ceased since the depression, since I no longer get any enjoyment out of the two most previously enjoyable pastimes of mine, besides sex, which has, likewise, gone down the tubes. I'm not even sure what my actual question is, aside from being confused by contrasting literature and my own lack of progress, despite a plethora of pharmacalogical interventions. I suppose I'm grasping about for hope (though not at the expense of honesty), since I've been unemployed for nearly four months because of this, not to mention the damage it's done to my interpersonal functioning (Christmas and Thanksgiving with the fam was rough since I also seem to be overstimulated by just about anything.) It's also become increasingly difficult for me to even leave the house and all I want to do is sleep so I can get at least some temporary relief. Any insights, personal experiences or advice would be greatly appreciated. I can't keep this up indefinitely...
poster:Meatwood_Flack
thread:1034506
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20121231/msgs/1034506.html