Posted by Lou Pilder on August 30, 2012, at 21:34:37
In reply to Re: losing streak, posted by b2chica on August 30, 2012, at 8:29:53
> i dont know how to respond to you all.
> but thank you.
> as for Lou..been on risp. did nothing for me. and i would not ever go med free again in my life. meds have done Nothing but help me. though struggles, and some terrible side effects. if i were med free. i'd be dead. as sure as anything.
>
> the rest of you. i cant tell you how much i appreciate your responses. i was pretty...well med max'd when i wrote it. i didnt mean to sound like i was having a pity party. but it sounds like it to me.
> i went to a work friends office, he was busy and had to leave so he shut the door for me and i just cried...and cried...and cried.
> then i drew my emotions in words on a piece of paper using every space on it. and folded it up and gave it to him on his desk.
>
> i came back to my office, picked up my things and left to the library. what seems to be my safe haven. i couldnt read, i couldnt write, i couldnt do homework so i just sat with a book, pretended to read and listened to relaxing music, watching children and parents go by.
> i remembered all the times i've come there with my girls. i realized that my oldest would have only very little memory of me, and my youngest would have none.
> i realized that right now when "daddy" yells at them, IM the one that 'makes it all better'. Im the one that rationally explains what they did wrong and HOW they can change their behavior in the future. I'm the only one that wants our children to go to the parochial school that has Excellent education. and I'm the one that shows our daughters religion and thoughts and cares about others besides ourselves.
>
> then i realize...even if i get yelled at, or hated at the moment. That i'm that pillar for the two youngest in our home. that i NEED to withstand certain things, and change what i can.
>
> Thus last night i did not speak but basic needs to DH. Silently moved my things down to the basement. crocheted for 15 min. and zonked out.
>
> ...i had the best night sleep of a long time. and it was Not because of all the meds in my system. it was because of the silence of waking up. not worrying about being yelled at or kicked, or pushed over in the middle of the night. no snoring, and no yelling at me in the middle of the night because he found out our daughter had an accident in the bed...
>
> i'm still quite down today. but so far only a little teary, but not near what i was yesterday.
>
> and even though i'm kinda a failure at work these days. i'm going to keep trying.
> its all i can do until i loose my job next year.
>
> thank you all
> for the kind words and support.
> and i think this is more psychological than medicine...i think. but who knows.
> if it continues then i'll need to get apppt. but maybe a three day weekjend will help too.
>
> i really needed my family yesterday...today.
> and greatly...YOU all are it.
>
> 8:30am now, i'll post back later in the day.
> b2Friends,
It is written here to me,[...if I were med free, i'd be dead as sure as anything...].
Now I want to talk the the {less-confident} people here. Now you might think from reading what is in question here that med-free equals death. I hope that you will look at both sides now.
You see, it is now official by the FDA what I have known for years, that many psychotropic drugs can induce suicide thinking, And it is generally accepted that 42,000 people died last year from psychotropic drugs in one way or another. This means that each month about 3500 people die from these drugs. Now I know just a few that see the caliber of disaster indicated by the deaths from these drugs. Lets see, you have 1000, 2000, 3000, 4000, 5000 6000 deaths from the drugs. Deaths that could mean that we could have those people alive if they did not take those drugs, in less than 2 months. And the beat goes on. You see, the 42000 deaths is from last year, and the year before that there were about 35,000 deaths. Do you see a progression? The more advertising by the drug companies, the more people {ask their doctor} for drugs and I predict that next year there will be 50,000 deaths from these drugs. And the next year 70,000. And if you add up all the years lost due to deaths from psychotropic drugs, the number becomes (redacted by respondent). All those years gone by.
And when you see the lives of children snuffed out by these drugs, drugs that caused them to kill themselves, it becomes a human tragedy. And if anyone tells you that you will die unless you take mind-altering drugs from a psychiatrist/doctor/prescriber, tell them about all those years gone by. Tell them that you want to live. Tell them that those drugs can cause death. Tell them that you do not want a life-ruining condition such as diabetes or tardive dyskinesia. Tell them about it. Tell them that you are {less-confident}, but you are not {less-alive} and thst you want to not die from psychotropic drugs. Tell them that when they tell another to take a psychotropic drug that they could be sentencing them to death. Death by their own hand, death by heart attack, death by serotonin syndrome, death by diabetes, death by liver failure, and if they are alive after years and years of druggin', they could be in a living death. Tell them that (redacted by respondent).
Lou
poster:Lou Pilder
thread:1024405
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20120830/msgs/1024514.html