Posted by tepi on June 17, 2011, at 23:05:09
In reply to Re: A DRUG TO HIGH ME, posted by sigismund on June 14, 2011, at 23:32:49
> > Im living this hell and that this is gonna continue for all my life
>
> Well, yeah, I know what you mean. Is it because you want to escape the prison so much that it is so hard to get out of? You know what Jesus said 'To him who has shall more be given, but to him who has not, even that which he has shall be taken away'.
>
> I remember you talking about being between your parents when they were fighting, so perhaps things were not even so good before you were 15? Or did it start then?
>
> (Coca leaf grows to the south of you, and people in your country are killed in their efforts to get cocaine into the US. But I certainly didn't mean cocaine. I meant coca. I'm just thinking out loud, Tep.)
>
Oh yes , I understand now . Well Im not sure if cocaine would be my answer, Do you think so?
Things are dangerous here because of cocaine. Many people is going to live to the united states because of the violence. One Doc recomended me first to leave this environment . He said that would help me to think better.... I dont know> If you can find someone (or some animal) who needs you, who only you can help.....I was feeling, rightly or wrongly, that this might be good for you......rather than you looking in from the outside at people and feeling that your illness prevents you from having the sorts of times you want.
> Feeling useful and needed is good enough. Not as good as feeling attractive and desirable, of course.
>
> It's not fair, I know. But is there anything better than Nardil? And you stopped that because, if I recall correctly, you didn't think you were depressed. But was it not helpful at all?
>
>
Yes I stopped it because of that and because I decided that was not the way I wanted to feel the rest of my life. I was not happy .
I wish I could live just a little bit better . Just to have the minimal skills to be with a girl , make a family , have some friends to really enjoy and to give thanks for these things ... I have a good family but I Just cant feel Im blessed , Its impossible. My heart was also affected...
poster:tepi
thread:987823
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20110610/msgs/988612.html