Posted by PartlyCloudy on December 18, 2010, at 8:38:19
In reply to Re: I feel like I need an x-mas cocktail » PartlyCloudy, posted by Maxime on December 17, 2010, at 20:04:19
> Thank you PC. This is probably the worse I have been at Christmas. Mainly because I wasn't doing very well to begin with. I feel like I am going to have a break down. I really don't want that to happen. I DO NOT want to end up in the hospital.
>
> I feel like I am going to snap which is a scary feeling. I know A LOT of people feel this way this time of year, so I know I am not alone. And yet I am alone.
>
> Today was my last day of work until January. I am scared that I am going to stay in bed a lot. That's not very productive. Although I am tired of being productive.
>
> Just really, really, really depressed and tired.Last year was bad for me. I felt really trapped in my own home (guests behaving badly!) and so tried going out for a drive. Of course, I couldn't even find a cup of coffee on Christmas day - absolutely everywhere was closed.
I so understand that feeling of being trapped.
The best analogy I can come up with is my recovery from alcoholism; that "one day at a time" adage, which sounds SO trite when we are in our depths of misery. It worked for me to break that down into manageable increments. One day became an hour at a time, and how I could distract myself from myself, if that makes any sense. I kept breaking the time down until it got to where I got through an entire day.
Enjoyable? Not. But I made it through a very difficult time my contorting my days in this way. I'm not suggesting that my past drinking issues resemble the pain you're going through now. But it struck me that part of what helped me was to come up with a "safety plan" of some kind for myself.
Whether it's checking in with an email friend or on the phone, there are ways you can get through these holidays without having to resort to your medicine cabinet and a bottle for the ultimate relief.
Let me say here that I'd be honoured to be such a person for you.
pc
poster:PartlyCloudy
thread:973744
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20101218/msgs/973842.html