Posted by Klavot on August 1, 2007, at 18:34:36
I experience these episodes where I feel extremely stressed out, anxious and angry. They seem to be getting worse. They come and go in waves which last anywhere from 30 minutes to two hours, usually late morning, then mid afternoon, and then late evening. When it happens, I do things like bite my fingers (not fingernails, but actual fingers). My fingers are covered in blisters most of the time. I also develop this intense rage, beyond any reasonable proportion, towards people who I perceive have harmed me. I become extremely pessimistic and negative about life. I fixate on my failures and compare myself unfavourably to people who seem to have achieved more than I have. I become physically restless and pace up and down waving my fists. It really is ridiculous. And when it's over, it dissipates within literally minutes, and I feel calm, poised, relaxed and happy, happier than happy, like I just had an emotional catharsis.
What is wrong with me? I'm not taking any medication at the moment. This does not seem to happen when I take Zoloft, but I don't want to go back on to Zoloft just for that. Maybe I could try a very low dose, like 25 mg / day? Might any of the other SSRIs do the same job better than Zoloft? The benefit of Zoloft for me is that I've got Zoloft on tap from my local pharmacy. Any other drugs I would first have to get a prescription for. Ugh! Just the thought of going to my doctor and explaining all of this to him already exhausts me. And if I want to see my psychiatrist, then I will have to wait probably two weeks minimum for an appointment. Maybe I'll try chamomile tea.
Klavot
poster:Klavot
thread:773393
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20070730/msgs/773393.html