Posted by rousseau on February 11, 2007, at 10:00:25
Hello. This is my first post to these forums. I'm in need of some support and feedback, and I'm not sure where to begin, but I'll begin from where I am, which is not in a good place. I am taking 2.5 mg. of Zyprexa along with 1 mg. of clonazepam at bedtime and waking up feeling MORE depressed after having felt like my sleep was peppered with a vague, uneasy dreaming. The clonazepam I've taken for quite a long time, so I don't attribute this new form of sleep (smile) to that. I should mention that I've only been on the low-dose Zyprexa for ONE week.
I recently had a partial response to Seroquel, feeling somewhat less depressed (I noticed the sun "felt" a little more welcome) and a little "calmer", but developed problems with the electrical control of my heart. It may or may not have been the Seroquel, since I had these same symptoms before in the distant past, and now I'm thinking it may have been exercise-induced arrhythmia. They have all but disappeared now, and this may actually be more related to problems with my heart than medications, since I was told to discontinue exercising until testing is done.
Here's my thought: What if I NEED an antidepressant? My psychiatrist is NOT very keen on using antidepressants with me, but I'm feeling I need more help than just a mood stabilizer, or maybe I need a different mood stabilizer. My libido is not great, and I experience many depressive symptoms. Oddly enough, six days after the PA and primary doctor took me off Seroquel, I started to feel like myself again in the sense that I could respond to people with more spontanaeity and didn't feel as though a part of my real self was imprisoned somenow. That is one reason why I fear these medications.
I would be so grateful if I could get some feedback from other people who have struggled to find their way through this molasses-like prescription highway. When I mention that various drugs have improved my libido, the psychiatrist makes remarks about mania, hypersexuality, aging (I'm 53. So what, I say?), and that most psychotropic meds induce some sexual dysfunction (Effexor did not do that, nor did Prozac)and that I'm getting used to a "normal" sexual response. I reject this theory. I was never hypersexual in the true, clinical sense of the word, and now I'm dragging my way through things thinking, "Where is my spark?". I want to get angry with this guy and tell him to stop projecting a clinical picture onto me that isn't real. But I am the patient, and it's not possible to have a neat, crisp sheet of paper to hand him that shows him where my real pain lies.
I'm sorry about the length of this post. I hope this is not inappropriate. My first time here and I've already written my first chapter in frustration. I just don't feel well, and my faith in these docs is waning with each new attempt to medicate me.
I'm wondering what would be wrong with adding prozac to this olanzapine? How would I know that olanzapine is right? Should I keep taking it for weeks and then make a decision? I'm already looking at entire cakes as ONE serving, not several. Know what I mean?
Thank you for bearing with me here.
Rousseau
poster:rousseau
thread:731765
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20070207/msgs/731765.html