Posted by med_empowered on November 30, 2006, at 2:44:08
I'm off meds--I've been off meds, except for a brief trial run of tramadol, for over a year now. I have terrible mood swings, but they're getting better. I have terrible anxiety, but its getting better. I sometimes can't sleep, but I deal with it the next day. Contrary to the predictions of my shrinks, I haven't slumped into any sort of super-anxious or agitated or manic or depressed or psychotic state.
I'm just...me. Like I was before the meds; in fact, now I feel as if I have to make up for the time I spent on meds...a big part of the challenge for me has been to live and learn without meds, to face fears without a klonopin or an abilify or a propranolol and learn to talk to friends, not some over-worked, callous shrink or sympathetic therapist. Even my family and friends, who were once so sold on the idea of me being always and forever mentally ill--"schizophrenic" briefly, then "bipolar"--say to me: They were wrong. You're weird, you're moody and angry and witty and odd, but you're not crazy.
So now I'm right. I'm right when I say that the shrinks lied to me, and they're probably lying to you, too. Odds are, if you're on this board, you have a shrink. And your shrink is prescribing meds to control a "condition" that, really, exists only in the DSM. I mean, of course some of us are afraid a lot or sad or hear voices or get agitated, but the idea that any of the multitude of drugs out there somehow magically, specifically fix these problems is ridiculous. If that were the case, then why are some people with depression given antipsychotics, while people with schizoaffective disorder may only take depakote? Or...why are autistic and/or misbehaved kids being "treated" with the same meds we give to schizophrenics...why is it an "antipsychotic" for the schizophrenic, and a "tranquilizer" for the autistic kid? Why are both of these people often being coerced or forced to take these meds? Why are billions being made by doctors and companies off of *our* suffering and *our* pain?
Why is it that its illegal to throw someone in jail because they're "strange" or "odd," but its perfectly legal to lock up a person who is "bipolar" or "schizophrenic" ? And why is it that someone accussed of murder gets a trial by jury before being sent away, but someone who hears voices or acts oddly or just upsets those around them is sent away with the thumbs up of a low-level judge? And why is imprisonment "punishment" for one, and "treatment" for the other?
Why? Because its lies. Its all lies, lies, lies, and here's the biggest lie of them all: You're crazy. Because even though I don't know you, I haven't met you, I probably never will meet you, I know you're not crazy. I'm pretty sure you're stressed and sad and scared and anxious and unfocused and struggling, but I KNOW you're not crazy because I hear my own life in yours and see my own struggle in yours and I know that if there's hope for me without overpaid shrinks and 10minute med checks and a plethora of psychotropics then there's hope for you, too.
So...disagree, if you want, and I'm sure a lot of you (most? all?) will. That's fine. Just know that even if you don't believe in what I say, I believe in YOU, all of YOU, and in your ability to meet life's challenges without the cruel compassion of those who "help" us by numbing us, "cure" us by destroying our souls.
poster:med_empowered
thread:708890
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20061129/msgs/708890.html