Posted by jane d on July 30, 2004, at 2:39:45
In reply to Help required. Very Confused. Kinda Urgent., posted by Daniel Woodfield on July 29, 2004, at 9:49:13
You don't sound at all odd to me. From silly sexual mistakes around 15 to lost adolescence to afterwards feeling, as you put it so well, as though I'd also lost most of what I'd learned about myself and life up to that point.
I was a bit luckier in that I did well on an SSRI (prozac) at first. Later I had problems that sound like a milder case of what you experienced. One day I looked up and didn't know where the last year went. Being in the US, I went the poly drug route and found that adding wellbutrin helped a bit. So did lots of other drugs. A bit.
Since you have to work within your system there and elaborate drug combos aren't an option I'd suggest you give the effexor a real try. In fact I'd say that even if you were in the US. Since Effexor doesn't work on serotonin alone it may not cause you the same problems that paxil did. And four days is enough for you to feel a temporary stimulant effect (I often do) but not nearly long enough for you to know if it would work as an antidepressant. I have friends who swear by it.
If that doesn't work you could then try a tricyclic. Same idea - that something that doesn't just work on serotonin may not cause you the same problems with apathy. And since they are old (and cheap) I expect they are on the NHS formulary. Just in case one of these drugs did cause the same problems as the paxil did I'd make sure my family and doctor knew about what happened. That you have someone clearheaded watching out for you.
I'm sure it's frustrating to read about all these new drugs and elaborate combinations that you can't get. But after years of trying various combinations myself I'm not convinced they work particularly well. It's easy to say that xyz drug increases dopamine and therefore taking it will increase your motivation. Or energy. Or whatever. And sometimes it does but it seems to work out far better in theory then when you are actually standing there swallowing those handfuls of little pills.
Another thing you can try even without a cooperating health system is to stop or cut back on the alcohol. I found it was true that when I started an antidepressant my need for alcohol just evaporated. It surprised me at the time. Now think that stopping the alcohol first might have lightened my depression sooner. If I drink now I find my mood gets worse most of the time. This may not be true for you but it's worth a try.
It sounds like you have a good doctor and that's a real plus. If you think he'd be interested in some of the general information you've dug up you might try printing it out for him. Even if he can only give you five minutes he might find time to look at it later since it would benefit more people than just you. I also blank out when at an appointment no matter how much time I have. I've tried writing stuff down in advanace the way people tell you to but when I'm actually there I often forget that I've got notes to look at and just sit there mumbling. My current definition of a good doctor is one who manages to ask the right questions anyway.
Good luck and don't be too hard on yourself. It sounds like you've gone a long way already towards getting yourself back on track.
Jane
poster:jane d
thread:371983
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20040724/msgs/372214.html