Posted by KrissyP on February 25, 2003, at 23:11:45
In reply to Near the end., posted by Blah on February 24, 2003, at 13:55:49
> I tryed Zyprexa and it was even worse than antidepressants, appart from the physical symtems it made my depression much worse. My "expert" pdoc just gave me some geodon instead. I don't think I'm going to take it. My depression has gotten to the point where everything is pain. I eat and am still hungry. I sleep and am still tired. Every thought every breath is pain. Talking to people is harder than it has ever been, and that's saying alot for me. I ordered some Ultram over the internet because buenanophine (i probably spelled it wrong) is new so it's too expencive and hard to find. If it doesn't work, or if some other miricle (like a supportive girl friend) doesn't happen I will most likely commit suicide. It's hurt to much for too long and pdocs don't give a sh**. Thearapy can do no more for me after 24 years. These new psyc meds are just as crappy as the old and i don't have the time or energy anymore for endless drug trials just to satisfy the "ethics" of my doctors. It just hurts so much, and I have no hope left.------------I can tell you that I have felt EXACTLY how you feel in this post, and never felt so much pain as I have in the last few days. You have choices. I have choices and it is one heck of a FIGHT---I know, you CAN and WILL find strength and get back your hope-I believe in you and no, I may not know who you are, but I do know how you feel. I have struggled with a loneliness, and depression so bad at times that I tried suicide---2x it is NOT worth it. Things will pass, and be assertive with your doc or a doc that will listen to you- YOU DESERVE to be heard, ny friend. Don't let anyone tell you different, please. I can't say either things will get better, but I hope they do for you. I too have so often said "no one gives a s#@!" but the fact of the matter is, some do and some don't. In regards to your post, I care because I hear your despair. I wish I could wave a magic wand and make things better-but I cannot. Keep hanging in and if need be, please get to the ER.
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poster:KrissyP
thread:81414
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20030224/msgs/203868.html