Posted by tina on November 16, 2002, at 18:45:46
last saturday I lost a friend to mental illness. Wednesday was her funeral and it was beautiful and perfect.
I took friday off and went to the cemetery to 'talk' with her. I brought her yellow and white roses. It was cold and sleet fell around me but I felt strangely good.....tranquil. She is buried in the shade of a very large oak tree and as I sat by her side, I found I wasn't at all cold. The breeze stirred the branches of that great oak and leaves cascaded softly down almost reaching the earth but were whisked away again by a sudden change in the wind. I talked to her and sat with her for over an hour. I felt more connected to her now that she's gone than when she was here......that's strange isn't it?
I have been reflecting on my own life since her passing and I have come to the conclusion that I will not die that way. This illness will not beat me. I may not have the rosey fairytale but I will find some purpose, some fulfillment...somewhere, somehow. That is the gift she has given me.
Living with purpose will be my gift to her.With immense gratitude......thank you K.
I will never forget.......
poster:tina
thread:751
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/2000/20020724/msgs/751.html