![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 7 of 7. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Phillipa on November 3, 2013, at 9:21:09
Do you find others play what I call as mind games? Pretend one thing but really mean another. What's this called does it have a formal name? Phillipa
Posted by Phil on November 3, 2013, at 10:27:07
In reply to Mind Games, posted by Phillipa on November 3, 2013, at 9:21:09
Maybe passive aggressive. Oh nice blouse, really be great if you could drop a few pounds.
Posted by baseball55 on November 3, 2013, at 19:14:32
In reply to Mind Games, posted by Phillipa on November 3, 2013, at 9:21:09
Sometimes it's a kind of barely conscious manipulativeness. Can't say what you want, maybe can't even say to yourself what you want, but try to manipulate others into giving you what you want.
I used to do this a lot, especially with my husband. I didn't want what he wanted, but didn't really know what I wanted or how to express it, so I would just be difficult and negative.
Posted by Phillipa on November 3, 2013, at 20:20:22
In reply to Re: Mind Games, posted by baseball55 on November 3, 2013, at 19:14:32
I guess there are a lot of forms of mind games one uses. Different for each. Phillipa
Posted by sigismund on November 4, 2013, at 15:06:23
In reply to Re: Mind Games, posted by baseball55 on November 3, 2013, at 19:14:32
I would like to understand the nature of play better, and therefore the idea of mind games.
Is play a kind of pretending according to certain rules?
Mind games might be something along these lines?
If, after all, we don't really exist, a great deal of pretending is necessary. Just thought I'd throw that in.
It doesn't have to be manipulation. Flirting is a game, is it? Passive aggression is a pain. Manipulative people are a mental strain, having to concentrate so as not to put a foot wrong. But play is essential and it is not what we are (I am) good at. Kids do it naturally, at least before they go to school.
Posted by Phillipa on November 4, 2013, at 20:42:01
In reply to Re: Mind Games, posted by sigismund on November 4, 2013, at 15:06:23
Sigi I love to play!!!!
Posted by Dinah on November 5, 2013, at 7:47:32
In reply to Mind Games, posted by Phillipa on November 3, 2013, at 9:21:09
I suppose that sometimes there are mind games. I think that other times people might be using that label in an attempt to try to explain what they don't understand.
I think my behavior with my therapist might have been viewed by some therapists as mind games. Fortunately my own therapist didn't label them as such - at least not out loud and not for long periods of time. He realized that my confusion and lack of interpersonal skills might have led to behaviors that appeared on the surface to be manipulative and led me to try behaviors that were actually far better at achieving the results I wanted.
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Social | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.