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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 10 of 10. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Kath on April 8, 2007, at 17:40:10
I'm feeling a little stressed & also pretty hopeful!!!!!!
I hope to find some support from people who've been there as to my situation with my son.
Easter has felt sorta dismal. He's not doing great & as you know, how I feel usually depends on how he's doing. I wish I wasn't like that.
:-( Kath
Posted by Phillipa on April 8, 2007, at 21:27:51
In reply to I'm off to the Nar-Anon meeting; Dismal Easter, posted by Kath on April 8, 2007, at 17:40:10
Kath have a good meeting. I relate as my Son had drug problems before he entered the Army. Love Phillipa
Posted by scratchpad on April 9, 2007, at 8:25:39
In reply to I'm off to the Nar-Anon meeting; Dismal Easter, posted by Kath on April 8, 2007, at 17:40:10
Holidays are the absolute worst time for me. ((((Kath)))) I'm certain that you'll find some great people at the meeting. Let us know how it goes, ok?
Scratchpad
Posted by Kath on April 10, 2007, at 19:12:54
In reply to Re: I'm off to the Nar-Anon meeting; Dismal Easter » Kath, posted by scratchpad on April 9, 2007, at 8:25:39
The meeting was good. 11 people; very nice folks.
I got pretty teary during the readings from the book. They are GOOD!!!!!
I 'connected' with one lady in particular & I guess vice versa, as she approached me afterwards & we chatted. She said I could phone her if I needed to.
Saw my son today. I drove him to his appointnment with his worker & afterwards he came over to my place & put his shoulder-length hair into a ponytail & buzzed it off. I'm glad because he was looking so "down & out"!!!! I was actuallyl sort of embarassed to be seen with him. :-( He asked if I'd be willing to wash his clothes while he was having a shower (which I was because they were SO smokey!!) When I emptied his pockets before putting them into the washer, there were 2 tiny plastic bags (drug-type bags). Plus his eyes looked QUITE different - very small pupils. I know he's using & I suspect he's using various things. Alcohol, weed, cocaine, E that I know of.
SOOOOOO - I don't think it's out of the realm of possibility that he'll get psychosis again. I don't know how much difference the anti-pschotic meds will make if he keeps pumping sh*t into his body!!! His poor brain.....it's supposed to be healing!!
Oh well. In the meantime, Nar-Anon meetings will hopefully help keep me sane & healthy!!
I HATE drugs. They have ruined SO many lives.
Oh well. Nothing I can do about it, right?
Thanks for your ongoing support.
hugs, Kath
PS - how are you-all?
Posted by Phillipa on April 10, 2007, at 21:06:51
In reply to Re: I'm off to the Nar-Anon meeting; Dismal Easter, posted by Kath on April 10, 2007, at 19:12:54
Always inpatient drug abuse programs aren't there Kath? I have no idea what Canada offers. Love to you sweet thing. Love Phillipa
Posted by Kath on April 14, 2007, at 13:01:53
In reply to Re: I'm off to the Nar-Anon meeting; Dismal Easter » Kath, posted by Phillipa on April 10, 2007, at 21:06:51
> Always inpatient drug abuse programs aren't there Kath? I have no idea what Canada offers. Love to you sweet thing. Love Phillipa
Hi Phillipa - I'm sorry; I'm feeling a bit deense; I'm not sure what you mean?
Hugs Kath
Posted by zenhussy on April 14, 2007, at 14:46:44
In reply to I'm off to the Nar-Anon meeting; Dismal Easter, posted by Kath on April 8, 2007, at 17:40:10
>>>I'm feeling a little stressed & also pretty hopeful!!!!!!
I hope to find some support from people who've been there as to my situation with my son.
Easter has felt sorta dismal. He's not doing great & as you know, how I feel usually depends on how he's doing. I wish I wasn't like that.<<<
kath,haven't read much lately but thought of your meeting w/ his case worker and have been wondering how you're holding up.
the very reason you're going to the Nar-Anon meetings is to help you get beyond having how you feel attached to how your son is doing.
you're a mother who loves her son dearly but you're wise enough to seek out additional support so that you can be strong enough to say NO to him, to not enable or fall into other behaviours that may be part of this cycle w/ your son.
best wishes for this ongoing battle.
--zh
Posted by Phillipa on April 14, 2007, at 20:14:19
In reply to Re: I'm off to the Nar-Anon meeting; Dismal Easter » Phillipa, posted by Kath on April 14, 2007, at 13:01:53
Kath just meant that if he becomes unmanageable are there day or inpatient programs to help him or is the system totally different in Canada? My neighbors Daughter who was abusing pain meds attends a partial day program. Love Phillipa
Posted by Kath on April 16, 2007, at 12:45:10
In reply to Re: I'm off to the Nar-Anon meeting; Dismal Easter » Kath, posted by zenhussy on April 14, 2007, at 14:46:44
Thanks Zen,
I have 2 Nar-Anon meetings under my belt now!
I went again last nite. I know they're going to be a good thing for me!!!
The nice thing that I realize is that nobody is going to expect 'perfection'!!!
I had a bad experience with a CoDA sponsor in the past, where if I didn't 'follow through' with the actions that I decided upon (under some subtle pressure from the sponsor), the sponsor would 'disapprove' -- Boy, how messed up is THAT?!!! But, then again, the sponsor was also codependent!!!
Anyhow, I'm really glad I'm going to Nar-Anon.
I'm feeling stronger. Have made a firm proclamation to my son that whatever he decides to do, he must be aware that if he gets in trouble with the law, I will NOT become involved in any way. He was angry (go figure) - but I stuck to it!!
Had a meeting with his worker today about me seeting a boundary of not having contact with him if he's using. I still need to sort out the wording & the exact nature of what I need.
I realize that since he's come back I had been expecting that he'd stop 'using'. Well, he IS still using as a way to cope with stress, so I have to accept that (I now have) & figure out what my emotional involvement is going to be!
He's still on the emotional roller coaster with GF. 2 days after his birthday (which she didn't keep her promise about coming back to Ontario for) she let him know NOT to call her; that she's in love with the 'A' in Vancouver. (She'd told my son that she was in love with HIM 3 weeks before!).
Well, a couple of weeks later, she called him from jail. (Credit card fraud!!) She'll be out on the 28th apparently (can you imagine such a light sentence?) So when she spoke with him, she said that she was coming back to Ontario in a year & wanted to be with him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OKAY - what is it about being in love that I don't 'get'?? I didn't know it could revolve semi-weekly!!!
I told him that that was NOT OK & nobody deserved to be treated like that & that she should leave him alone & let him heal & go forward with his life. I am hoping that he wouldn't consider putting his life on hold for someone who has proved she can treat him like this!!! (Don't know if you know it's been going on like this since mid-February; on again off again, etc)
Anyway, even this, I'm able to be more detached about than I would have only weeks ago!!
Thanks for your ongoing support.
How are YOU???
hugs, Kath
Posted by Kath on April 16, 2007, at 12:47:23
In reply to Re: I'm off to the Nar-Anon meeting; Dismal Easter » Kath, posted by Phillipa on April 14, 2007, at 20:14:19
> Kath just meant that if he becomes unmanageable are there day or inpatient programs to help him or is the system totally different in Canada? My neighbors Daughter who was abusing pain meds attends a partial day program. Love Phillipa
********Well, there are short-term programs - 2 weeks/3 weeks, etc. & I think it's pretty quick to get into them.I don't know a whole lot about it. The main thing is that the addict themself has to admit themself (as far as I know).
Hugs Phillipa, how are you? luv, Kath
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