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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 13 of 13. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Corafree on April 6, 2005, at 19:23:07
Midlife CRISIS! Decision no where in sight.
Must choose #1, #2, or #3 living style!
I am a hippee like, rock-n-roll like, long hair like, independent like, not good at marriage like, Bonnie Raitt like, freebird like, 5_-y/o woman! Yuch and Yikes! Time is running out and decision must be made soon or loose what I know is behind 'Door #2'!
#1 I CAN STAY HERE & RENT FROM A NEW LANDLORD (NOT MOM) & LIVE ON MY SSD OF $850. ..or
#2 I CAN MOVE TO A 55+ COMMUNITY AND RECEIVE THE GIFT OF A VERY NICE, IN VERY NICE PARK, MANUFACTURED HOME ON OWNED PROPERTY, AS A GIFT FROM MY MOTHER. ..or
#3 I CAN GO OUT AND TRY TO FIND ANOTHER PLACE TO RENT & LIVE ON MY SSD OF $850.
I'm here lost in pros and cons and would appreciate insight. cf :(
Posted by Bobby on April 6, 2005, at 19:35:12
In reply to Every Pro is a Con and Vice Versa, posted by Corafree on April 6, 2005, at 19:23:07
Posted by Larry Hoover on April 6, 2005, at 19:47:22
In reply to Every Pro is a Con and Vice Versa, posted by Corafree on April 6, 2005, at 19:23:07
> Midlife CRISIS! Decision no where in sight.
>
> Must choose #1, #2, or #3 living style!
>
> I am a hippee like, rock-n-roll like, long hair like, independent like, not good at marriage like, Bonnie Raitt like, freebird like, 5_-y/o woman! Yuch and Yikes! Time is running out and decision must be made soon or loose what I know is behind 'Door #2'!
>
> #1 I CAN STAY HERE & RENT FROM A NEW LANDLORD (NOT MOM) & LIVE ON MY SSD OF $850. ..or
>
> #2 I CAN MOVE TO A 55+ COMMUNITY AND RECEIVE THE GIFT OF A VERY NICE, IN VERY NICE PARK, MANUFACTURED HOME ON OWNED PROPERTY, AS A GIFT FROM MY MOTHER. ..or
>
> #3 I CAN GO OUT AND TRY TO FIND ANOTHER PLACE TO RENT & LIVE ON MY SSD OF $850.
>
> I'm here lost in pros and cons and would appreciate insight. cf :(I don't know how being a hippie weighs into the decision, but I'd take door number 2 (if it's an outright gift). Then you can: a) live there, and have more of that SSD left for better things than housing costs; b) rent it out and use that to increase your earnings; c) sell the dang thing and get something more to your liking.
b) and c) might not work, I can easily understand.
Lar
Posted by Corafree on April 6, 2005, at 20:00:40
In reply to #2 (nm) » Corafree, posted by Bobby on April 6, 2005, at 19:35:12
Thank you Bobby! cf
Posted by Corafree on April 6, 2005, at 20:06:06
In reply to Re: Every Pro is a Con and Vice Versa » Corafree, posted by Larry Hoover on April 6, 2005, at 19:47:22
Thank you Lar. cf
Posted by Corafree on April 6, 2005, at 21:04:21
In reply to Re: Every Pro is a Con and Vice Versa » Corafree, posted by Larry Hoover on April 6, 2005, at 19:47:22
Just a quick add.
Will not be in my name until my Mother passes away. She has more energy than I and is age 67.
Neighbor on one side of me is 88-y/o.
What? Do I hear 'discrimination' in my thoughts? Shame on me. And, where understanding, depth, a hint of humility in my thoughts!? Shame on me again.
My self-esteem (now studying through Melanie Ferrell 'Overcoming Low Self Esteem' with T) feels/behaves good or bad in exact reaction to others' acts or reactions. Do tho' still recall good self-esteem and for that I am fortunate.
Your posts in respond to mine lead me to realize 'most likely to succeed' answers; how does that work, I wonder. Maybe I think myself not worthy enough to journal to me. Maybe I am kind of 'journaling' with people who feel like my friends.
I'm no champ @ posting; like beliefnet, but don't post; found psychcentral today; may check it out someday.
Like 'a blankie', I want to take you all w/ me to the 55+ park; we could take a bus and have a picnic .. ha!
cf (truth realized in freedom and vice versa)
Posted by Bobby on April 6, 2005, at 21:35:53
In reply to Re: #2 » Bobby, posted by Corafree on April 6, 2005, at 20:00:40
You can always change your mind if you take #2--but if you take 1 or 3, #2 may slip away for good.
Much luck
Posted by Corafree on April 6, 2005, at 22:27:33
In reply to Re: #2 » Corafree, posted by Bobby on April 6, 2005, at 21:35:53
Yes you're right... tks again, cf
Posted by anastasia56 on April 6, 2005, at 23:06:53
In reply to Re: #2, posted by Corafree on April 6, 2005, at 22:27:33
does door #2 come with any strings? does she have to live with you or anything?
if no strings, i'm with everyone else in selecting #2~
Posted by alexandra_k on April 7, 2005, at 1:30:10
In reply to Re: #2, posted by anastasia56 on April 6, 2005, at 23:06:53
I'm thinking #2.
With the extra money you have, well, that buys you extra freedom to GET OUT and DO STUFF. You might find your neighbour is a right doll! Or she might move on anyways and you get someone else who is closer to your age.
But a gift is a gift...
And extra money counts for a lot.
Just my opinion.
Posted by Corafree on April 7, 2005, at 11:25:44
In reply to Re: #2, posted by anastasia56 on April 6, 2005, at 23:06:53
Yeah, prob' a few as long as it is not in my name.
There is a man no one in my fam' would want me to ask to spend time with me there.
I would not be able to sell it, of course.
I will lose a portion of my mother's inheritance put into a large business she put together where all the rest of my family live/work.
It is all a bit upsetting because my father has only been gone a bit over a yr - this business was all anyone talked about as he passed from his wonderful life to another. I feel a lot of anger pain towards my there, for that reason. I do know tho' that he mentioned to a friend that he would like to leave everything he had to his one child who knew him best; his daughter, me. No one believed this was ever said (only told a couple - think I was in shock when did it).
Still the irreverance shown his beautiful life angers me.
I almost want to say take everything to family who seem to have become vultures, take everything because Dad and I don't need anything from any of you.
The only home I had, my Dad's in midwest, is now my sister-in-law's and my brothers.
It hurt that my Mo didn't see how I was the only one w/o a home.
She is building herself a new home on the ground she was born and needs liquidity from this condo for her new home.
I saw all but one or two members of what I thought was a good and caring family become horribly selfish, and carry on as if he had not given so much to them.
It is difficult.
I'm going over to manufactured home right now to get keys from the realtor my Mo had given them to. Will give her a set to keep also.
If I could be a stronger person ... but besides emotional illness, I have more than one chronic physical illnesses! Dang! Otherwise, I'd walk away from everything they tarnished!
Sorry, rambling again. cf
Posted by Corafree on April 7, 2005, at 11:30:32
In reply to Re: #2, posted by alexandra_k on April 7, 2005, at 1:30:10
I gave care to my grandparents on both sides, much much more care than any of my siblings. The phone was always passed to me. I'm sorry if this sounds wrong, but I feel I earned something. Too many times in my life, what is expected never arrives! My mother would never let me have this good feeling. I asked her is she felt I had earned the right to feel a worthy member of my family of origin. She never replied to that email. Me :( sad. cf
Posted by Corafree on April 9, 2005, at 11:20:07
In reply to Re: #2, posted by Corafree on April 7, 2005, at 11:30:32
I went over to 55+ home and spent a few very quiet hours. Walked down to the clubhouse - not one person had anything on their heads except short, white hair.
The next day someone called my mother in midwest, and she called me; said lady across the way saw someone taking things out of her place.
It was me w/ my pillow and toileties. I'm thinking, 'Oh great, a da*n Gladys Kravitz across the street!!', ha! cf
This is the end of the thread.
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