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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 17 of 17. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by alexandra_k on March 12, 2005, at 20:24:06
Posted by minnewa on March 12, 2005, at 1:55:38
Any one here familiar with cutting? And why a person would want to live?
Posted by Gabbi-x-2 on March 12, 2005, at 21:11:36
In reply to (Redirect) cutting, posted by alexandra_k on March 12, 2005, at 20:24:06
I don't have much Minnewa, I think you'd probably get more responses on the Psychology board. As for finding a reason to live?
Well, believe it or not, when depression is treated *properly* you don't really even think about it. At least that's been my experience.
It's incredible what the right treatment can do, I wouldn't have believed it myself.Good luck
Posted by alexandra_k on March 12, 2005, at 21:36:42
In reply to (Redirect) cutting, posted by alexandra_k on March 12, 2005, at 20:24:06
> Any one here familiar with cutting?
Yup. Do you do this? Do you find that it helps?
>And why a person would want to live?
I guess different people find different reasons. I don't know what sorts of reason might suit you because I don't know anything about you.
Do you think you would prefer to die?
How come?
Posted by minnewa on March 12, 2005, at 22:59:37
In reply to Re: (Redirect) cutting, posted by alexandra_k on March 12, 2005, at 21:36:42
Yes I do cutting.. Have for decades.. My problem is I guess I wa married for 22 years and now it is ending.. And it wasn't because I was unfaithful or anything..
Posted by alexandra_k on March 13, 2005, at 0:03:19
In reply to Re: (Redirect) cutting, posted by minnewa on March 12, 2005, at 22:59:37
> Yes I do cutting.. Have for decades..
There are other people here who do that too. It can be really hard to stop because most people who do it find that it does help in a way - even though it can also be unhelpful in other ways. I guess I was just wondering if you had any idea why you do it.
>My problem is I guess I wa married for 22 years and now it is ending.. And it wasn't because I was unfaithful or anything..
Aw hon, thats gotta be really hard for anyone. And 22 years is a long time to have spent with someone. It must seem unbearable at times to think of the changes to your life that will follow from that.
Do you want to talk about it a bit more?
Posted by minnewa on March 13, 2005, at 19:02:15
In reply to Re: cutting » minnewa, posted by alexandra_k on March 13, 2005, at 0:03:19
I guess it is getting worse now though.. Used to be an every once in a while thing.. Now it seem to be a couple times a week. Even with the medication it seems it is harder to resist doing it. It does help make the other hurt go away for awhile though..
Posted by alexandra_k on March 13, 2005, at 23:40:50
In reply to Re: cutting, posted by minnewa on March 13, 2005, at 19:02:15
> I guess it is getting worse now though.. Used to be an every once in a while thing.. Now it seem to be a couple times a week. Even with the medication it seems it is harder to resist doing it. It does help make the other hurt go away for awhile though..
Yeah. I guess that is why some people do it. Beause the physical pain is a distraction from the mental pain. Do you have someone you can talk to about that and about what is going on in your life? A therapist or something?
Posted by minnewa on March 14, 2005, at 0:14:08
In reply to Re: cutting » minnewa, posted by alexandra_k on March 13, 2005, at 23:40:50
Yes. I see a therapist every week.. Doesn't seem to do much so far... I am still of the general opinion that life just generally sucks...
Posted by alexandra_k on March 14, 2005, at 1:21:58
In reply to Re: cutting, posted by minnewa on March 14, 2005, at 0:14:08
> Yes. I see a therapist every week.. Doesn't seem to do much so far... I am still of the general opinion that life just generally sucks...
Yeah. It can get real hard at times...
How come you don't find your therapist very helpful?
Do you try to talk to them about what is going on for you in your life?
Posted by minnewa on March 14, 2005, at 22:14:16
In reply to Re: cutting » minnewa, posted by alexandra_k on March 14, 2005, at 1:21:58
Sometimes it does. It seems to divert my attention at least temporarily. I tell my therapist every thing. I think sometimes I scare him. Talked about hospitalizing me a couple of times.. I got to the point where it seems that death is a viable option. And I am not afraid to die. I guess I still just have a few things to do that keep me going.
Posted by alexandra_k on March 15, 2005, at 1:30:31
In reply to Re: cutting, posted by minnewa on March 14, 2005, at 22:14:16
>I guess I still just have a few things to do that keep me going.
Good :-)
> Sometimes it does. It seems to divert my attention at least temporarily.
Yeah. I used to go to group therapy and everyone there used to cut themselves. We would talk about why we did it and about what sorts of other things we might be able to do that would help divert our attention (or whatever) that wouldn't be such a problem. Do you talk about this stuff with your therapist?
>I tell my therapist every thing. I think sometimes I scare him. Talked about hospitalizing me a couple of times.. I got to the point where it seems that death is a viable option. And I am not afraid to die.
Yeah. I don't think I am afraid to die either. But that being said in the past 4 years or so I have actually found myself being glad I am alive. I never ever thought I would feel that way. But I do now. I really hope your life gets better soon.
Keep chatting to me if you like :-)
You could also check out the other boards.
You could talk about how therapy is going over on the psychology board. Even about cutting if you wanted. There are lots of friendly people over there. I hope you stick around :-)
Posted by rubenstein on March 15, 2005, at 9:29:59
In reply to Re: cutting » minnewa, posted by alexandra_k on March 15, 2005, at 1:30:31
I also have problems with cutting, but am doing better with it. My last time was a week ago and I restrained myself from doing more damage than I usually do. It is a hard battle. I find it as a way to punish myself and forget about the problems at hand. My therapist knwos and we are still working on it. It is kind of liek an addiction I think. It is strange becuase I know it is so irrational but at the time it is the only thing that I can think of doing.
rubenstein
Posted by minnewa on March 15, 2005, at 22:39:26
In reply to Re: cutting, posted by rubenstein on March 15, 2005, at 9:29:59
I know what you are saying about an addiction. Know you shouldn't do it but can't seem to stop from doing it. I know I have to stop myself sometimes after I get started before I get too carried away.. It isn't always easy..
Posted by alexandra_k on March 19, 2005, at 17:15:23
In reply to Re: cutting, posted by minnewa on March 15, 2005, at 22:39:26
Yeah.
Have you tried to do other things instead when you feel like cutting?
One thing that I was told to do instead was to hold an ice-cube in my hand until it had melted into nothing (or until the urge to cut went away). It starts out cold - but after a while it hurts. It was supposed to help because the intense feeling of pain was supposed to help distract me from the emotional pain in the same way that cutting did.
Do you think you could give it a try?
Posted by smokeymadison on March 20, 2005, at 16:54:32
In reply to Re: cutting » minnewa, posted by alexandra_k on March 19, 2005, at 17:15:23
hi minnewa and alexandra k,
i think that cutting is a complex issue, an addiction, a form of punishment, a form of release from feeling whatever it is you are feeling at the moment. i have used it for various reasons, but mostly to stop feeling whatever it is i am feeling. sometimes i feel numb and don't want to or sometimes i feel too much and don't want to. i know that when someone feels pain, endorphens or something are released that make you feel better (content, happy).
i too am going through a breakup right now. it isn't nearly as intense as it would have been if i had been with the person for as long as you have, minnewa, but it still hurts like hell. just try to keep in mind that there is a certain sort of freedom from not being in a relationship. it is a chance to start over new with your life and to change. it is very hard to change yourself when in an intense relationship if the person you are with doesn't change with you. you have a chance to make some major changes in your life. i wish you luck. i would be happy to keep talking with you if you want to.
SM
Posted by minnewa on April 1, 2005, at 0:26:39
In reply to Re: cutting » minnewa, posted by alexandra_k on March 19, 2005, at 17:15:23
Well on top of all that has been going on for me I was diagnosed with COPD this week.. Seems like I won't make it till retirement.. Sounds like 5 years will be a pretty big stretch.. And a divorce and depression to boot.. Now cutting seems even easier.. When I can see the endd of life anyway..
Posted by wendy0006 on May 4, 2005, at 16:26:56
In reply to Re: cutting, posted by minnewa on April 1, 2005, at 0:26:39
I have been a cutter and self-injurer since I was 9 and would try to draw blood with syringes. I have scars all over from different methods, but usually i just cut. There is a book called, "The Bright Red Scream" that is very good. I thought the title was perfect because when I cut I feel like I am somehow trying to show my inner pain with outer scars.
It is commonly said that most women with depression who cut have Borderline Personality Disorder. Try to find a psych with a good familiarity with this.
There is treatment called Dialectical Behavior Therapy originated by Dr. Marsha Linehan - she has books out. You could try to find a therapist skilled in that treatment. They teach you distress tolerance and other skills to specifically help borderlines and others with intense emotions.
Good luck, wendy
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