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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 9 of 9. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Civ on December 15, 2003, at 11:09:14
One of the main reasons why I am anxious and depressed most of the time is because I don't know what I want to do in life. I worry about making money, being able to provide for a family, and things like that. Basically, your typical anticipatory anxiety. But, back to a career, I almost feel like I've wasted the last 2.5 years at college. I don't like my current major (business management) at all and nothing else really seems appealing. I just turned 21 and, with that, comes the new pressure to be an adult and contribute to society (you know, all that stuff). I know there are a few things I love.
1. humor
2. sports
3. communicationWhen I used to take career surveys in high school, I scored high in communications careers. I'm good with theories, abstract ideas, and things like that. That's actually what I think I should do. For example, I have a lot of interest in being a sports talk radio show host. I did this at my college radio station for a few months and really enjoyed it. I felt alive for one of the few times in my life. It was a rush and I loved every minute of it. So that might be something I'd like to do but I guess I still worry about not making enough money, not being good enough, etc. It's just a lot of self-doubt and confusion.
Did you guys know what you wanted to do when you were 21? If you had inclinations, did you actually follow your heart or just settle for something else?
Posted by Penny on December 15, 2003, at 12:53:11
In reply to Finding a career, posted by Civ on December 15, 2003, at 11:09:14
Someone else might give very different advice from what I'm going to say to you, but anyway...take what you will from this. I hate my career. I've been out of college 5 1/2 years - I enjoyed my major (journalism and mass communication), and I was good at it. But 5 1/2 years and three jobs in PR later, I am completely unhappy with my choice.
Why? It's not that I don't have the skill necessary to perform the job. It's that I don't like sitting behind a desk every day, staring at a computer screen. I don't think I had any idea as a student that my career would involve so much desk work - I guess I had the impression that P.R. was more people-oriented, but in my experience, it's not.
So...now I'm planning for a career change. I don't expect to ever get rich, and right now I'm barely making enough to scrape by. It sucks. I'm trying to figure out how to change careers - it will probably require going back to school, which, of course, will require money and time. It's not going to be easy, any way I look at it.
I think my gut told me when I was a student that I wouldn't be happy sitting behind a desk. An internship in public relations I had in college was miserable. A job I had at a daycare as a teacher assistant was great. I should have listened to my instincts instead of my head...
So, my advice to you is to not limit your options. If you are unhappy with your business major, that is probably not going to change once you're out of school. Regardless of how much money you are making, you are spending the majority of your waking hours at work, so, IMO, you should try to find a career that you ENJOY.
Don't get me wrong - you have to be able to live. You have to make a decent salary, etc. If money wasn't an issue, I would leave my job right now and go work for a daycare or as a nanny...but the reality is that I have to keep a roof over my head and make car payments and whatnot. So I continue on in a career that I hate - but I'm determined (at least today) that I'm not going to do this forever.
My therapist told me that I need a career where I can 'be myself'. I think she's right - and I think you need the same thing. Try to get to know yourself. Listen to the nagging voice in your head that's telling you when you are taking the wrong path. Figure out a way to do what you want to do and make money at it. I have friends in broadcasting - it's not great money, but you can make a living. Something to consider. Do internships. Do volunteer work. Change your major - so what if you don't graduate in four years? It'll be easier to make such changes now than it will after you've been out in the 'real world' for a few years and your resources are more limited.
To put it plainly - DON'T SETTLE. You will spend too much of your life working to settle for less than what you really truly want.
Good luck.
P
Posted by Susan J on December 15, 2003, at 13:11:59
In reply to Finding a career, posted by Civ on December 15, 2003, at 11:09:14
Hiya, Civ,
I totally agree with Penny. Keep the options open.
>>If you don't find anything else appealing in school (ie another major), then I'd stick with the business degree and get it over with. That degree opens doors, and that's always a nice thing.
But people these days definitely change jobs often, and are more and more changing careers entirely. I worked as a support staff person in a university athletic department, worked as an investigator in jail, worked as a personnel specialist, then an employee benefits planner, then a legislative counsel. All entirely different. :-) I'm 36 and have had at least 4 *real* careers.....
>>I worry about making money, being able to provide for a family, and things like that.
<<If I were you, I'd just worry about supporting yourself. Your future spouse will have fine job skills and when you plan marriage or whatever, you can sit down and decide if both of you will continue working, who's going to keep working, who's not, what income goals you have, etc.
I know there are a few things I love.
>
> 1. humor
> 2. sports
> 3. communication<<Have you ever thought of working in Sports Information? That's what I did, in two different athletic departments. You get to deal with communication, and you get to watch tons of athletic events and write about them! The salary is nothing to write home about, unless you work for a large university with great teams, but it's life-sustaining. And if you are doing something you love.....well, that's worth all the money in the world, right?
>>I have a lot of interest in being a sports talk radio show host. I did this at my college radio station for a few months and really enjoyed it. I felt alive for one of the few times in my life.
<<OK, remind me to read all of the post before posting.....radio talk show host -- very similar to Sports Information and if you started in SI, you make TONS of contacts!>> but I guess I still worry about not making enough money, not being good enough, etc. It's just a lot of self-doubt and confusion.
<<I dunno what your financial situation is like right now, but while you are in school, why don't you try to get a job in the athletic department and see if that type of thing is interesting? When I worked there, I, little minion student, met tons of TV and radio and paper personalities/columnists and all that. Plus, you'd get some experience. you'd see it's not as hard as it looks, and it would help you develop more self confidence. BTW, whenever you change (or start) a career, there is an accepted learning curve. You are not expected to know everything right off the bat.>
> Did you guys know what you wanted to do when you were 21? If you had inclinations, did you actually follow your heart or just settle for something else?
<<I wanted to be a sports photographer. That's why I got into Sports Information. I would have continued with it but I had also been very interested in police work and stuff like that, so when the investigator position opened up, I took it. Now I'm a lawyer.I don't think many people actually feel passionate about their careers. If you find that, that's absolutely wonderful! If not, then you need to search out other things in life that you feel passionate about. Doing volunteer work, starting a family, painting horrible paintings in the basement that no one will ever see but that you absolutely adore. That type of thing.
Life is a journey, and you are just starting it. You won't be holed into any particular path if you don't want to. You will continue to make choices forever, and sometimes they made lead you away from your goals. But you can always get back there if you want them badly enough. I don't know many people who've taken a totally straight road in life. I tend to think the bumpy curvy ones are more interesting anyway. :-)
Good luck!
Susan
Posted by Wildflower on December 15, 2003, at 15:26:30
In reply to Finding a career, posted by Civ on December 15, 2003, at 11:09:14
Hi Civ.
Are there career counselors available at your school to help?
I know there are a few things I love.
>
> 1. humor
> 2. sports
> 3. communicationHave you thought about a career in sports marketing? You could take the things you love and create fun campaigns for sports teams. Working for an ad agency may work for you too. They're very relaxed and full of creative, fun people.
>Radio.
I must warn you that although radio is a lively industry, there is much turnover and low salaries. (I interned at a radio station while I was in college). If this is what you love, you may want to supplement this with a second job.
> Did you guys know what you wanted to do when you were 21?
Heck, I'm 28 and I'm considering a career change. It's the age-old debate between happiness (doing what you love) and money (a job that pays the bills).
Have you ever read the book, Quarter Life Crisis? It's a great book for those who are twentysomething.
Best wishes.
Posted by Miss Honeychurch on December 15, 2003, at 15:57:48
In reply to Finding a career, posted by Civ on December 15, 2003, at 11:09:14
Civ, I am 34 and just finally figuring out what I want to do. Like you, I have much anxiety about how it is going to pay the bills if I ever have the courage to pursue it full force.
Posted by Civ on December 15, 2003, at 16:10:31
In reply to Re: Finding a career » Civ, posted by Susan J on December 15, 2003, at 13:11:59
Thanks to everyone who has replied thus far. I definitely agree that practically no one is passionate about their work. It's an epidemic. I hope I can be different.
Posted by sarita0001 on December 15, 2003, at 17:23:47
In reply to Finding a career, posted by Civ on December 15, 2003, at 11:09:14
Hi,
I say do what you love first, the money will come. A person can make a lot of money and hate what they do. If you can find something you love and make money too, great. But it all depends how important money is to you. I'm 25 now. I was a History major in college, at first I thought I wanted to teach college or have a career in history but then I thought that would be boring as anything. But I loved studying history and learned a lot so it wasn't a total waste. After college, I volunteered for 2 years(which required traveling) and through this I met many interesting people, it was fun. During those 2 years, I was doing stuff I liked but figuring out what to do. Now I'm in social work, but it is so hard and takes a lot out of me. And I certainly won't make much money but I figure that if a person wants to pursue a career that won't make much $, they'll find a way to make it work. Just like I think you will too. And as someone else said before, people change careers all the time.
It also depends a lot where you live. Sports and communication work might be easier to do in a big city. I don't know how open you are to moving. But that's a whole other story. I am sure other people you know are in the same situation.
Talk to people, do specific research, go to the careers section at Barnes and Noble, and talk to family members and/or friends if you can. It's good that you are thinking about things and being honest with yourself.Good luck,
Sara
Posted by octopusprime on December 15, 2003, at 20:58:25
In reply to Finding a career, posted by Civ on December 15, 2003, at 11:09:14
Civ:
Is it possible to sign up for internships or co-operative education programs at your school? I took 6 paid co-op (intern) positions while at university, and it really opened my mind to career possibilities.
(Of course, then i turned around and got a job that was really only marginally related to my degree and co-op workterms, but a girl's gotta eat, and the job's ok).
Also, are you entrepreneurially inclined? Colleges and universities have great entrepreneurship networks. You'd have a better chance of finding a job that you love; of course, it's not without risks and possible financial hardship.
I agree with the other posters, it's ok not to know what you want to do when you grow up when you're 21. But there's lots of opportunities to explore, and it's easier to do that exploring from a university or college campus.
cheerio
Posted by jay on December 15, 2003, at 23:04:38
In reply to Finding a career, posted by Civ on December 15, 2003, at 11:09:14
Well...I'm almost 34...and I still don't know what I wanna be when (if;-) I grow up! I was a career counsellor for a few years, but never got my foot in the door enough to move up and on. So, don't take my advice...hehe. lol :-)
But, for *any* job, you need experience...experience...*experience*..! Having all of the education doesn't mean that much to employers these days. It also sucks for younger folks...because how can you *get* experience if no one will hire you?!?! So, turn to volunteering, as much as you can. It may take a year or so, but is one of the best ways for someone who is young and maybe doesn't have a *ton* of experience.
Second...go to your school guidance/career center, get your resume updated (I mean...shiny gold, as employers will throw less in the garbage), and talk to a career counsellor to see if you need help in the interview or job search dept....or any other area. Always good to be a top-notch above the other! You can also do some "career exploration" there, to find out what you both want, and any skills you need.
Best wishes...and remember it takes time. You may really surprise yourself!
Best,
Jay
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