Shown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by almondjoy on December 5, 2003, at 0:56:43
i can't sleep...so heres a story...
on our trip to miami a couple months ago, some friends who live in FL picked up my guy and i to go to Key West, traffic was a little slow, and after an hour my friend told us it was still going to be 2 1/2 hours, did we still want to go. we said yes, even though we admitted later that we hadn't wanted to go by then and shouldve said so bcos the trip was horrible and took almost twice as long to get there. not only that, i ignored the feeling that morning before our friends even showed up, that said i shouldnt go. drat! soooo...
my guy and i have been together for just over a year, and are planning to get a place together, we're supposed to move next week. the old apt manager showed up a unit 3 weeks ago, the first two she tried she couldn't work the key to get it in (i wondered if it was a sign but ignored it) we liked the one we saw though, and i had concerns that weren't totally addressed but we gave a deposit w/ appplication, got approved next day. then today i got a call from the new manager, the other chick got fired, saying i have to pay something on my credit to get approved, and we can't move in on the date we'd planned w/ the old manager.
i thought i'd just pay it, and move on as planned but what if this like when my friend said, "we still have 2 1/2 hours, we can go back now" if i say i "can't" fix my credit they deny me and give back the deposit. i can stil fix my credit and find a new apt, there are lots of properties available now.
the bad news...my guy is really set on this apartment, doesn't think we'll find another he'll like as much and wants to do it NEXT WEEKEND like planned (my current lease is up dec 31 anyway) i don't want him to resent me if we find somewhere not as PERFECT but i dont want to hate it if there's something really wrong with the apt and were stuck in a year leasei got alot gong on right now and im not sure what to think or do, im tired, pmsing, generally confused, medicated, and worried (about moving, finals, christmas, money, and my Mother)
whenever i think of moving, i think of that richard pryor movie called moving...hilarious!!!
i guess i'm 99% sure it'll be easier than that tho
i just want to sleeep
Posted by deirdrehbrt on December 5, 2003, at 7:18:29
In reply to MOVING, posted by almondjoy on December 5, 2003, at 0:56:43
AlmondJoy,
You certainly have alot to think about, and I don't have a great deal to offer you in the way of advice. One thing comes to mind though: Try to get some time to yourself to just sit and think about how you feel with both of your choices. Try to see how each one feels within you. I think that somewhere inside, you know what is the best answer for you, but it might be burried beneath the expectations from your guy, family, boyfriend, and all of those other pressures you are experiencing.
Take a long hot bubble bath, with gentle music. Take a walk in a safe, quiet place. What ever quiets your mind and lets your thoughts come freely, that is the state to be in when making a difficult decision.
Peace and light,
Dee.
Posted by deirdrehbrt on December 5, 2003, at 7:18:29
In reply to MOVING, posted by almondjoy on December 5, 2003, at 0:56:43
AlmondJoy,
You certainly have alot to think about, and I don't have a great deal to offer you in the way of advice. One thing comes to mind though: Try to get some time to yourself to just sit and think about how you feel with both of your choices. Try to see how each one feels within you. I think that somewhere inside, you know what is the best answer for you, but it might be burried beneath the expectations from your guy, family, boyfriend, and all of those other pressures you are experiencing.
Take a long hot bubble bath, with gentle music. Take a walk in a safe, quiet place. What ever quiets your mind and lets your thoughts come freely, that is the state to be in when making a difficult decision.
Peace and light,
Dee.
Posted by blink23 on December 5, 2003, at 14:42:13
In reply to MOVING, posted by almondjoy on December 5, 2003, at 0:56:43
Hi there.. I know how your feeling and I've been there done that. I have always said and thought that things happen for a reason...Which so far have turned out to be true.. One turn puts the situation great or the problem fixed and if you took the other turn you could have been down shi*s creek and know that you have made some huge mistakes. For example.. You, your IFFY on this apartment thing because of the way things have fallen through and have turned out so far. Deep down you know what to do, but you feel like you need to go against what you really think to make someone happy or to avoid confertation. Has your boyfriend ever had his own appartment? Dosnt he think of how your feeling about what you want? There are so many place out there, i know..it's a pain in the butt, all the best to you and good luch with everything
Blink
Posted by almondjoy on December 5, 2003, at 16:58:00
In reply to Re: MOVING, posted by blink23 on December 5, 2003, at 14:42:13
Thank you both...I did it...told my guy I wasn't moving there and that I looked around alot today so we can still move next week if we want. It totally sucked! He would barely talk to me on the phone, said he didn't understand what was wrong with the apartment and it didn't make sense. Then we almost got in an argument, but he stops talking instead of fighting so I got silence...and I feel like dirt :(
(almondjoy)blacknblu
Posted by blink23 on December 5, 2003, at 18:10:35
In reply to Re: MOVING, posted by almondjoy on December 5, 2003, at 16:58:00
he's the one who should feel like dirt. He is making a nut into peanut butter. You both should agree on somthing together, ya know.. and he should understand that if you feel weiry about that, he should understand... this is where compromising comes in.
blink
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Social | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.