![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 35 to 59 of 59. Go back in thread:
Posted by fayeroe on May 11, 2003, at 12:34:56
In reply to Re: tx for the kindness but we need to end this thread » Greg, posted by ayuda on May 11, 2003, at 10:50:10
I've been asked, as I've told you, to ask people to quit posting about Beardy and just let her be. Whatever her reasons are, it's her choice. It's for her well-being and that is what is paramount. So, with this posting, could this thread stop? I feel as though Ayuda and I have explained it in depth and surely everyone can respect her wishes and drop it. I will pass your well-wishes along to Beardy. Just please quit posting and stop the thread. Thanks a lot, Fayeroe
Posted by Dinah on May 11, 2003, at 12:39:18
In reply to Re: tx for the kindness but we need to end this thread » Greg, posted by ayuda on May 11, 2003, at 10:50:10
To process our reactions to be compared to an icky, skin crawling causing, cyber stalker?
Posted by gabbix2 on May 11, 2003, at 14:11:57
In reply to Re; Ok, but can we start a new thread?, posted by Dinah on May 11, 2003, at 12:39:18
Geez
Posted by Dinah on May 11, 2003, at 14:28:30
In reply to I'll think twice before I askwhere Ted is again !, posted by gabbix2 on May 11, 2003, at 14:11:57
Posted by gabbix2 on May 11, 2003, at 14:32:55
In reply to Re: Was that this thread? Ah, the twists and turns (nm) » gabbix2, posted by Dinah on May 11, 2003, at 14:28:30
Its just that this all started with someone asking where Beardy was, boy you just never know do you?
Posted by shar on May 11, 2003, at 14:51:15
In reply to tx for the kindness but we need to end this thread, posted by ayuda on May 10, 2003, at 20:00:28
>people like shar and
> linguine are the problem.> ...and then there
> are posters like shar and linguine and
> others (we know who the usual suspects are)
> who insist on making others feel put-down.Wow, I find this so offensive; primarily because I'm being accused via hearsay that I ran somebody off (somebody I'm fond of), and being included in "the usual suspects" who everyone knows (except me, I guess, because I didn't realize I was so obnoxious).
[If I could have made this another thread I would have, so as to honor the wishes of the kind people looking out for the person who is the subject of this thread; however, I don't know how to make a response within a thread into a new thread.]
I am truly surprised, and honestly don't know what I did to the person who evidently I ran off.
However, since this is an international board, and the justice system rules of the U.S. don't apply (being able to confront one's accuser), plus it is a private board so the only rules that apply are Dr. Bob's...I will assume it is just some sort of horrible misunderstanding.
Still, this all makes me wistful for directness and honesty from others (well, let me qualify that...directly from the others involved, if accusations are involved).
Shar
Posted by shar on May 11, 2003, at 14:53:00
In reply to shar, please don't ever post to me or about me (nm) » fayeroe, posted by ayuda on May 10, 2003, at 20:01:14
Posted by ayuda on May 11, 2003, at 15:50:31
In reply to Re; Ok, but can we start a new thread?, posted by Dinah on May 11, 2003, at 12:39:18
> To process our reactions to be compared to an icky, skin crawling causing, cyber stalker?
That is not what I meant, and that was taken out of context. I am talking about someone's feelings here!!!!!!!!!!
And I wasn't talking about cyber-stalking -- how do people just make up things out of nowhere?My god, now I understand why she has zoned off this board, you people take the cake.
I am going to where in the heck she is.
Posted by justyourlaugh on May 11, 2003, at 15:52:23
In reply to Re: tx for the kindness....Kindness? Where?, posted by shar on May 11, 2003, at 14:51:15
my heavens,,,
ive read all the posts.
i dont get it???
only good things were said about beardy...
if she (sorry hun)does not want people to remember her....then mabe she should not look...
beardy you are great...people see that and are concerned...thats all it is...
you have touched us...and will not be forgotton
j
Posted by gabbix2 on May 11, 2003, at 15:53:24
In reply to Re: tx for the kindness....Kindness? Where?, posted by shar on May 11, 2003, at 14:51:15
How can you stay so rational when you are in the twilight zone?...
I wanted to say, well, you know. I think you are very supportive, and kind, and thoughtful and funny and intelligent, and where the hell that crack about you thriving on putting people down came from is beyond me. Really. And I refuse to think about it any longer, because it would be lending credibility to it.
Posted by fayeroe on May 11, 2003, at 15:59:12
In reply to Oh No it wasn't Dinah, posted by gabbix2 on May 11, 2003, at 14:32:55
> Its just that this all started with someone asking where Beardy was, boy you just never know do you?
no, you don't.......because i posted a subject heading right after that question that said she was fine..........but it couldn't stop there. so, boy, you NEVER know when people just can't leave well enough alone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>
Posted by fayeroe on May 11, 2003, at 16:07:38
In reply to Re: Oh No it wasn't Dinah » gabbix2, posted by fayeroe on May 11, 2003, at 15:59:12
I have one more thing to add.......why is it ANY of OUR business why someone left and wants to be left alone? WHY? Isn't there something else you could be doing today? I personally don't care how you feel about anyone trying to protect Beardy...she wants no messages from here, no input, no links, nothing. What part of that is so hard to understand? Get each other's e.mail addresses and beat the horse to death!!! Enough!
Posted by gabbix2 on May 11, 2003, at 16:16:13
In reply to Re: Oh No it wasn't Dinah, posted by fayeroe on May 11, 2003, at 16:07:38
You got ALL that out of my post to Dinah
and you wonder if I don't have anything better to do?
Posted by fayeroe on May 11, 2003, at 16:28:18
In reply to Re: Oh No it wasn't Dinah » fayeroe, posted by gabbix2 on May 11, 2003, at 16:16:13
> You got ALL that out of my post to Dinah
> and you wonder if I don't have anything better to do? WHY could this not be enough??URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030506/msgs/224895.html
Posted by Dinah on May 11, 2003, at 18:38:24
In reply to Re: Re; Ok, but can we start a new thread? » Dinah, posted by ayuda on May 11, 2003, at 15:50:31
"I equate how she feels about this with the idea of some strange psycho-guy fantasizing about being with me. Can I stop him from thinking about me? No. Does it make my skin crawl to think what he's thinking about me? Yes."
You're right. I'm sorry. Cyber stalker was never mentioned. It was strange psycho-guy. I'm sorry for the error. I was a bit upset that anyone would think of my kind regards in that manner. Or anyone else's. But I am sorry for extrapolating.
This actually came up for me once. I had to leave the board for a while once, and came back to find a fair amount of speculation. And yes, it was unsettling. But I did understand the kindness and concern that was behind many of the posts, and I certainly wasn't angry with those who posted with those intentions.
I'm not sure how to say this without mentioning anyone, but really this level of protectiveness is not necessary with the vast majority of posters here who feel nothing but fondness and respect. And speaking for myself only, I am a bit hurt at having that fondness depicted as something ugly. Unless I am misunderstanding. And I certainly am open to the possibility that I am indeed misunderstanding the simile.
Posted by Dinah on May 11, 2003, at 18:49:40
In reply to Re: Re; I'm sorry, I mispoke. » ayuda, posted by Dinah on May 11, 2003, at 18:38:24
It's awfully hard to work out misunderstandings otherwise. Because there simply *has* to be misunderstandings on this thread.
Posted by gabbix2 on May 11, 2003, at 18:51:12
In reply to Re: Oh No it wasn't Dinah » gabbix2, posted by fayeroe on May 11, 2003, at 16:28:18
the subject had it referring to my post to Dinah, which is where I got confused.
Posted by Dinah on May 11, 2003, at 19:05:39
In reply to Re: Re; Ok, but can we start a new thread? » Dinah, posted by ayuda on May 11, 2003, at 15:50:31
I'm willing to understand that I misunderstood that simile. And I'll apologize for my post in its entirety. It really did hurt my feelings, you know. And my post was an extension of that.
But I think there's the potential for my feelings to be hurt a whole lot more if this discussion continues. :(
Again, I appreciate your loyalty and protectiveness.
Posted by shar on May 11, 2003, at 20:42:11
In reply to Shar.., posted by gabbix2 on May 11, 2003, at 15:53:24
Posted by gabbix2 on May 11, 2003, at 22:30:47
In reply to Thank you, Gabbix and Greg (nm), posted by shar on May 11, 2003, at 20:42:11
Posted by WorryGirl on May 12, 2003, at 12:38:49
In reply to Where's Beardy?, posted by BekkaH on May 5, 2003, at 20:01:06
> I wonder where Bearded Lady is. I haven't seen her in a while.
I just read most of the follow up posts to this. She seemed like a really sweet, caring, and funny person to me. She also responded to a few of my posts with answers that I appreciated.
I'm sorry to hear that she won't be posting again.
Posted by Pfinstegg on May 12, 2003, at 16:24:08
In reply to Re: Where's Beardy?, posted by WorryGirl on May 12, 2003, at 12:38:49
This is the saddest thread I have ever read here. It started with someone inquiring about a poster many of us love to hear from- a positive, well-meant question. The friendly tone of it apparently wasn't recognized, as it was received as a somehow hostile, excessive show of interest. Then, the people who originally had inquired with friendly interest were naturally hurt, and one or two responded in a slightly hostile manner. Then everyone was cautioned to be civil, leaving several, at least, to feel misunderstood- and silenced. As the thread goes on, everyone is sounding miserable, hurt, and angry- the natural reaction to having your friendly caring intentions thrown back at you as hostile and unwelcome- and to becoming angry and disappointed oneself.
We all need one another. Is there a way to pull this thread out, and get it honest and caring, the way it started?
Pfinstegg
.
Posted by fayeroe on May 12, 2003, at 20:50:43
In reply to Re: Where's Beardy?, posted by WorryGirl on May 12, 2003, at 12:38:49
I'll pass your message on to her. Thanks, Fayeroe
Posted by Dr. Bob on May 13, 2003, at 1:10:22
In reply to Re: Leave Beardy alone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! » shar, posted by fayeroe on May 10, 2003, at 18:51:29
> So leave her alone, stop speaking about her behind her back -- at HER request.
>
> Beardy has BEGGED her friends to keep her name away from this board, and this place has caused her SERIOUS trauma.
>
> ayuda> if she feels like staying away and is asking to be left out of posts then that is her choice.
>
> FayeroeThanks for passing on her request. I'm sorry if this place has caused her trauma, and I hope she knows how to report adverse events:
https://dr-bob.securesites.com/cgi-bin/pb/advent.pl
However:
1. If she feels like staying away, that's her choice. But whether others post about her is their choice. Please redirect any follow-ups regarding this to:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20030508/msgs/225854.html
2. If she feels harassed by specific other posters, she may request that they not post to her:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20030404/msgs/216665.html
If she doesn't want to have to post requests like that, she can email me, and I can do it.
Bob
PS: Other follow-ups to this post, and complaints about posts, should be redirected to:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20030508/msgs/225672.html
Posted by Dr. Bob on May 13, 2003, at 1:14:19
In reply to Re: Please be civil » Linguini, posted by Dinah on May 10, 2003, at 20:18:32
> > She usually makes grand exits, people miss her and then she comes back. look back in the archives.
> > Please! So dramatic
>
> Please don't jump to conclusions about others, or post anything that could lead others to feel accused or put down.Also, please only post under one name at a time, thanks.
Bob
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Social | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.