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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 7 of 7. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Manda on April 30, 2002, at 21:47:55
I have my first appt. with my new pdoc tomorrow morning, and I'm a little nervous. Well, a lot nervous. I'm worried about what he might tell me, not necessarily tomorrow, but in the days ahead. I'm worried that I might actually be bipolar, as everyone around me seems to think right now. On the other hand, if I am bipolar, I'm scared that he won't think that I am, and that I won't get the help that I need.
Also tomorrow- I have to go and beg for mercy from one of my professors. I have a paper due for him on Saturday that's worth 100% of my grade, and there's NO way that I can get it done, since I have two other papers, a presentation, and an exam in the meantime. (To make things better, I have finals next week.) I'm terrified b/c if he decides not to let me get an incomplete for his class (and finish the paper this summer), then I have no other option but to fail his class. Any tips on how to talk to him about this? I'm scared that I'll say the wrong thing and mess up my GPA (and my self-esteem) forever.
I'm hoping that my new pdoc will write me some sort of note to help explain to my professor that I'm really not lazy, just mentally ill. I've never been as screwed up as I have been in the last month or so. I can't handle this much longer. I've never felt so out of control and vulnerable.
I hope that there's some meds that can help. I hope that my professor understands. I hope that I can achieve some sort of stability in my life, if only for those who care about me. I know how much it worries them to see me like this. If only they knew how much I don't tell them to protect them...
-Manda
Posted by Penny on May 1, 2002, at 9:45:25
In reply to the moment (or day) of truth , posted by Manda on April 30, 2002, at 21:47:55
First of all...best of luck to you on finals!
Second...don't be worried about your 'official' diagnosis! I like to joke that my dx - Mood Disorders-NOS - just means "She's really screwed up but we don't know what the hell is wrong with her." But seriously, you are what you are, labels or no labels. And while it is important that your pdoc recognize cycling when he sees it or that he see your moods as they truly are, there's not one treatment answer for anyone based solely on a diagnosis. So be as honest with him as you possibly can be and try to give him a chance. We'll worry about what to do if he screws up at a later date. Just don't be afraid to ask as many questions as you can think of and get him to explain his reasoning for choosing whatever he chooses. If he can give you good evidence that this med is a good choice for you, then your confidence in him will increase.
As for your prof - I would recommend being as adult as you can be about this with him. I say that b/c in my experiences 'excuses' will only get you so far, no matter how legit. But focus on getting him to see that you are willing to set a new due date for your paper and you will stick to it. I would say to definitely tell him you've been having a really rough time but that things are looking up now that you have a new pdoc. Others on the board may have a different view on this, but I'm mostly honest about my situation.
Let us know how it goes.
Best to you.
Penny
Posted by Fi on May 1, 2002, at 11:27:20
In reply to the moment (or day) of truth , posted by Manda on April 30, 2002, at 21:47:55
Penny's advice makes a lot of sense. I would agree that you have more chance with the prof if you tell him that there is illness involved, as they must have past experience of giving 'incompletes' on that basis.
Of course its really scarey seeing the pdoc, but hopefully they will help clarify things for you, and give you effective treatment if you need it. So hang on in there (if you've not been already!)
Fi
Posted by IsoM on May 1, 2002, at 11:58:30
In reply to the moment (or day) of truth , posted by Manda on April 30, 2002, at 21:47:55
Manda, I'm glad to see you're still here - your post that one day struck fear in me & I so wanted you to not give up. Don't now. It's the beginning of the healing process. It may be long but you will reach a point where you can look back in relief & gratitude that you didn't give up.
I'm like Penny, I prefer honesty. Now that doesn't just mean with your prof but with everyone else too. "I know how much it worries them to see me like this. If only they knew how much I don't tell them to protect them..." You need to be honest with everyone or you'll end up hurting them far more than you'll ever realise.
Start off with the pdoc to be totally honest. I have a tendency when I present to doctors to be very clinical & calm acting & they have trouble believing how bad I am. Try not to get into my trap. If you feel yourself cracking as you talk to your doctor, do so. Break down & cry - I don't mean histronics or anything phoney but don't try to hold back.
I'm fairly certain he will give you a note for your prof. And as Fi said, when you talk to your prof, be open & rather than just "beg for mercy", let him also know that you seriously WANT to do the work involved but just need a little leeway, timewise. I've had this mercy extended to me while at university & hope this man is as kind & reasonable as my profs were.
Post back, please & let us know how it works out, sweetie.
Posted by Manda on May 1, 2002, at 13:05:51
In reply to Re: the moment (or day) of truth » Manda, posted by IsoM on May 1, 2002, at 11:58:30
Well, I have to make this very brief b/c my first paper/presentation is due in four hours. :( Anyway, my pdoc was really nice. He put me on Effexor and Trazodone (sp?). He says he's not sure whether I'm bipolar or not- definitely a possibility, but too many confounding factors right now.
My professor gave me an extension until the day before he has to turn in grades. If I can't make that, then I can get an incomplete. Yes, I was completely honest with him. He already knew that I'm clinically depressed b/c I missed his midterm (b/c I hadn't eaten in days and was really depressed), and he understands. So... it's all good. I'm in a great mood for the moment. :) Take care, and thanks so much for your advice and support!!
-Manda
Posted by wendy b. on May 1, 2002, at 15:22:49
In reply to Re: the moment (or day) of truth, posted by Manda on May 1, 2002, at 13:05:51
Posted by IsoM on May 1, 2002, at 18:22:17
In reply to Re: the moment (or day) of truth, posted by Manda on May 1, 2002, at 13:05:51
This is the end of the thread.
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