Shown: posts 1 to 4 of 4. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by akc on December 2, 2001, at 14:40:10
Guilt, shame -- and of course, the pain is still here. I knew the drinking wouldn't solve it. But the temporariness (word?) of it is rather startling.
And of course my day is going horribly. Right now I am trying to get the screen of the window. It is amazing how one little thing not going right can so ruin a day.
And it is only 2:30. I have AA this evening -- not sure if I will share what happened -- I don't think I will. At least not to the group. I need to to one individual because of something I agreed to do on Tuesday that I so don't want to do now.
I just want to curl up in my chair and never move.
Posted by Phil on December 2, 2001, at 16:31:10
In reply to The Day After, posted by akc on December 2, 2001, at 14:40:10
akc, You had a slip. Don't chastise yourself over what is done. Alcohol is such a tricky substance. Starts these cycles: drink, feel guilt-shame, drink to make that stuff go away.
Once alcohol gets you, it's in a class by itself.
I'd speak up in the meeting. Let people know how bad you feel. It will at least make their decision to stay sober a little easier..maybe not.Take a nap
Posted by Greg A. on December 2, 2001, at 22:58:22
In reply to The Day After, posted by akc on December 2, 2001, at 14:40:10
akc, don't be too hard on yourself. Do what you have to do to get by. I think I'm in the same boat as you right now. A lot of good intentions that were fairly easily maintained when my mood was up have fallen by the wayside. I just can't seem to do things that are good for me right now. Who can I blame? I tired of blaming me.
Greg
Posted by Marie1 on December 3, 2001, at 11:07:33
In reply to Re: The Day After, posted by Greg A. on December 2, 2001, at 22:58:22
akc,
Don't beat yourself up about it; none of us is perfect and you did what you had to do maybe. Maybe it isn't so all or nothing, so black & white. Nothing else in life is, really.
I did the same thing Friday night - Dec. 24th would have been 6 months not drinking for me. I was mad at myself Saturday, because I felt like shit and I blew off a perfectly beautiful day. But like Greg said, I'm tired of blaming myself for not being perfect. So I felt like getting trashed - that doesn't mean I'm bad, and it doesn't mean I'll do it again real soon. It just means I'm human, with human weaknesses. I choose to look at it that way.Marie
> akc, don't be too hard on yourself. Do what you have to do to get by. I think I'm in the same boat as you right now. A lot of good intentions that were fairly easily maintained when my mood was up have fallen by the wayside. I just can't seem to do things that are good for me right now. Who can I blame? I tired of blaming me.
>
> Greg
This is the end of the thread.
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