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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 17 of 17. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Muffled on November 15, 2007, at 16:22:19
My T is SO nice.
She was SO concerned bout me last night.
She didn't call hosp or nothing, she is good that way.
But she phoned me like I think FOUR times! and I phoned her proly 4x too.
And she didn't mind. She didn't get mad.
And I figger OK this is it, I just been being SO stupid lately, she gonna run now, but she say NO! she NOT gonna run.
MY T DON"T RUN!!!!
She say she care bout me.
Its so weird.
But mebbe she does too.
Even though I said bout some stuff.
She say I not gross.
She say I not bad.
She don't get mad at me.
She even say I can phone on WEEKEND.
I got a real nice T ok.
I am so lucky.
(((( T )))))
See good happy things.
She sent me email of coping ideas. Good ones.
There's flowers in my shitpile.
I am so lucky.
Its all so hard right now.
I all over.
But maybe it can be OK.
I love my kids.
Goto make it thru for them.
They need their ma.
M
Posted by LadyBug on November 15, 2007, at 16:50:31
In reply to Had to write this cuz its nice, posted by Muffled on November 15, 2007, at 16:22:19
((((((muffled)))))
You post really touched me.I'm so happy for you that you have a good T and that she won't leave you. You are OK! You will make it especially for your kids sake. They have a good ma in you.
I'm so glad you posted. I miss you. Your T cares so much about you. Stay connected with her ok? She'll see you through.
LadyBug
Posted by llurpsienoodle on November 15, 2007, at 17:30:21
In reply to Had to write this cuz its nice, posted by Muffled on November 15, 2007, at 16:22:19
muffled,
Things feeling like they are coming apart? but you are a fighter and you'll get through this. T is there to help. So is babble.I'm glad you didn't need to go to the hospital. Please keep in touch-- you're very dear to me.
If you ever feel the need to vent or dump poo or anything like that, go for it. Don't feel the need to self-censor when talking about it has healing powers.
You're a good mom, and a good person
-Ll
Posted by TherapyGirl on November 15, 2007, at 18:35:27
In reply to Had to write this cuz its nice, posted by Muffled on November 15, 2007, at 16:22:19
Oh, Muffled I'm so glad your T is there for you and that you're letting her be. I have suspected for a while that she's one of the good ones -- I'm glad to know I'm right. :-)
I got a tattoo last weekend -- I had HOPE tattooed on my shoulder blade. I'm going to share that tattoo with you because you give me hope when it's too hard and I want to do the same for you.
Keep hanging in there.
((((((Muffled))))))
Posted by rskontos on November 15, 2007, at 19:11:15
In reply to Had to write this cuz its nice, posted by Muffled on November 15, 2007, at 16:22:19
Muffled, I am thrilled that you are finally believing in your T!!!!! And yes your precious babies do need you, their precious mama!!! You are a special lady dear to all of us at babble. I am glad you share those thoughts. I had a good day today too.
Those flowers will spread their seeds and grow baby flowers!!!!
take care sweetie pie! Glad to hear from you! rk
Posted by littleone on November 16, 2007, at 3:41:23
In reply to Had to write this cuz its nice, posted by Muffled on November 15, 2007, at 16:22:19
I get that nice T feeling just reading what you wrote. I'm so glad you felt it too.
Sorry I haven't been around for ages. It's been so unsafe for me here since the big problems Dr Bob had a while ago. I now have a home computer and don't have to rely on my work computer to babble now. That feels a little safer, so I thought I would have another go here.
I'm not exactly sure I understand what has been going on for you. I know you've really struggled recently. Did you remember something bad that you weren't aware of before?
I find memory really hard. I remember hardly nothing from when I was a kid. I just "know" stuff. Like I know I used to play basketball, but I don't remember ever playing. I even remember very little from present day stuff.
Sorry, I tried to write more stuff about memory but the words aren't coming out right.
They still aren't working properly.
Sorry muffled. I guess I'm trying to ask you about what it was like to remember something you "knew" had never happened. Like I mean obviously it was pretty awful and it was probably like big earthquakes inside. But how had that something gotten past all your "it never happened" thoughts?
I don't think I'm making sense. I guess I wanted you to know I'm listening if you want to talk. Sometimes just talking about talking about something can help (like I sometimes talk to my T about what it would feel like to talk about a really hard subject. That then makes it easier to talk about the really hard subject.)
I've missed you.
Posted by littleone on November 16, 2007, at 3:42:29
In reply to Re: Had to write this cuz its nice » Muffled, posted by littleone on November 16, 2007, at 3:41:23
Sorry, that last sentense was really dumb. Pretend I didn't say that.
Posted by littleone on November 16, 2007, at 3:44:58
In reply to Re: Had to write this cuz its nice, posted by littleone on November 16, 2007, at 3:42:29
Sorry, that didn't mean that I didn't miss you. It just meant pretend I didnt' say it.
And what you said about your T *was* really nice. I'm glad you posted it. It's nice to hear good stuff too.
Posted by arora on November 16, 2007, at 7:57:59
In reply to Had to write this cuz its nice, posted by Muffled on November 15, 2007, at 16:22:19
Muffled-
I think it sounds like you've got a great T- I'm so pleased for you!
I'm glad you can trust her now- you're a really strong person, and you're gonna get through this.arora
Posted by Dinah on November 16, 2007, at 8:09:52
In reply to Had to write this cuz its nice, posted by Muffled on November 15, 2007, at 16:22:19
:-)
I'm so happy for you that your therapist is being so caring. And that she is there for you.
I'm sorry things are so hard for you right now. Kids do need their moms.
Posted by Muffled on November 16, 2007, at 8:59:53
In reply to Re: Had to write this cuz its nice, posted by arora on November 16, 2007, at 7:57:59
sorry i can't write right now.
I'm just all mixed up.
My reality is all messed.
I am confused cuz I still cling to the old, but the new is 'there' too.
I am struggling w/addictions issues to boot.
I just. I will try to write more later.
Thanks.
I be OK.
M
Posted by Muffled on November 16, 2007, at 11:25:10
In reply to Had to write this cuz its nice, posted by Muffled on November 15, 2007, at 16:22:19
I thot seroquel made my 'people' go away.
Ha! But they was just hiding, they freaked too in their ways.
I just keeping them in background as much as possible.
BUT I SO GLAD THEY THERE.
I feel much better.
They helped me so much.
I think I need them right now.
So this is good.
Thanks for all your kindness babblers.
One of my T's suggestions was even to babble if it felt OK.
Ha.
I be back.
Goto go.
M
Posted by llurpsienoodle on November 16, 2007, at 11:30:40
In reply to NUTHER HAPPY THING, posted by Muffled on November 16, 2007, at 11:25:10
seroquel (in my experience) isn't going to make you a different person. It may calm down neurotic tendencies, help with worries, and help you get restorative, healing sleep.
Your peeps are gonna be there no matter what. Don't think that a drug will somehow kill their voices. It's not quite like that. BUT the seroquel will help you get the voices and disarray under control until you get back on your feet.
Maybe taking an AP for a while is not such a bad idea? It helped a lot with intrusive thoughts related to PTSD...
((((((((mufflie's peeps))))))))
-Ll
Posted by rskontos on November 16, 2007, at 12:03:18
In reply to NUTHER HAPPY THING, posted by Muffled on November 16, 2007, at 11:25:10
You know Mufffled, I got sad the other day when my T and I talked about I guess it was whatever you call (my mind is kinda fuzzy today), when they are all joined and I got sad. I understand what you mean when you said you thought the medicine might make your people go away. I thought that too and the other night I was laying in bed not really thinking about nuthing and bam about 4 or 5 of them there. You know I get names then but can't remember next day. So far only one I don't know if I like she is the mad one, very angry. She calls mom a b**ch. I wish I could remember the names though. Anyway, I don't know if I ever want them to go......you know. It makes me sad to think of it right now. rk
Posted by Muffled on November 19, 2007, at 12:29:03
In reply to Re: NUTHER HAPPY THING, posted by rskontos on November 16, 2007, at 12:03:18
Ya I take the seroquel.
Rsk, apparently people don't goto go away.
They just work together better, and all are happy so not so much fighting and so while they still there you not notice so much. Thats all. They not have to go away.
M
Posted by rskontos on November 19, 2007, at 15:27:14
In reply to Thx LL and RSK, posted by Muffled on November 19, 2007, at 12:29:03
Thanks muffled, that is better knowing that. You helped me I think more than I helped you sorry.:() rk
Posted by RealMe on November 19, 2007, at 22:40:09
In reply to NUTHER HAPPY THING, posted by Muffled on November 16, 2007, at 11:25:10
Muffled
They will never go away. They will just learn to understand and help each other and you. People think that integration means that the people go away. They don't. They will be there and can help you and help each other understand where each is coming from. It is actually kind of neat when you get to that point, not scary. I know.
RealMe
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