![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 40 to 64 of 89. Go back in thread:
Posted by alexandra_k on January 18, 2019, at 9:27:56
In reply to Re: processing, posted by alexandra_k on December 19, 2018, at 15:47:40
I got "First Aid for USMLE" for 2019 even though it is unclear to me whether or not I get to do Med. Now, or ever.
For anyone who is following along, who doesn't know, it seems to be the go-to textbook studying for Step 1 of the Medical Lisencing Exam for the US. It's a really nice summary textbook of the basic science and basic organ system information that you are expected to know. More than that, it is a really nice summary textbook of things that it seems pretty darned obvious (to me) are useful or helpful to know. Relevant stuff. High yield. Whether it has anything to do with that particular exam, or not. Which is precisely what (to my mind) makes it worthwhile.
No matter how much of a jack-up the actual test (and test score allocation) might be...
I notice it does have a speel on how some schools are focused on high test scores... While other schools are more focused on other things. Letters of reccommendation, and the like. And I guess that is the thing, really. Me applying to MIT and Cornell... They were both Ivy League / Who's who kinds of schools. I needed letters from people who were known to people on the inside there, and / or to be from one of the schools where there is a through-flow of people (collaboration) between them...
There are plenty of really good schools in the US that are less... 'Destination' (for want of a better word). I should think more carefully about (and try and identify) that which is under-rated and on it's way up... That's more the spirit of it, for me... It's too 'easy' to find some of the bigger schools with more marketing investment and so on -- but those probably are not a very good fit for me...
I've been having lots of administration troubles, here. With the processing (or not). They are refusing to complete my research qualification in a timely fashion and I need it to be complete to be eligable for my next program of study.
It is like how the public schools won't get students grades back in time for them to start University the following year.
Or in time for them to be eligable for foreign scholarships to overseas Universities the following year.
The place I applied to Med... They calculated my GPA wrong (according to their algorithm). They aren't very explicit about their algorithm, but there are some statements of it that aren't too-contradictory so are probably at least partly authorative. And they say about 'full-time' and 'best 120 points'. But they calculated my GPA on the basis of one part time year... Treating it as a full time year. And they calculated my GPA on the basis of my worst (rather than best) 120 points for the other year. They made a complete balls-up of it, in other words. 8.0 instead of... Well, I make it to be 8.6. That's a pretty big difference when the GPA is weighted for 60 per cent of selection. I would be astounded if it wasn't enough for a place.
And yet, I still don't have a place.
Offers were sent out December 10 and I don't have a place.
Apparently my GPA was too low. Apparently with the 8.0 they gave me I was 40 places lower than the last selected Graduate.
I don't believe that... Or... I'll believe it when I see it...
I've put in an official request for information to see the rank list.
But then even if they calculate my GPA correctly (and they haven't acknowledged that they f*ck*d it up, yet) I'm not eligable (unless they make a 'special exception' because the other University refuses to say I've completed my thesis, you see.There are a range of thesis outcomes from 'accepted - subject to minor changes completed within 10 weeks' to 'accepted - subject to major changes to be completed within 10 weeks' down to 'failed. the thesis is returned to the student. teh student is required to pay 6 months additional fees before resubmitting the thesis'.
they are trying to make me believe the outcome is the last.
but the outcome is supposed to be on the basis of examiners reports.
the examiners say i should 'keep working' on 'making changes' but they don't say whether i should do that for 10 weeks or 6 months.a bunch of people from the Uni (who don't have authority to make final decision on thesis outcome) 'invite' me to pay 6 months more fees to the university.
they all go on and on and on about the scope and extent of the changes required.
they say i'm required to log all the changes so it's easy for someone else to verify i've done them (i don't see any evidence of that)
they just...
They all seem so utterly full of sh*t.
Is this a f*ck*ng joke?
Is it really the case that everyones stuff is mis-processed unless you spend however many hours paying sufficient homage to administration?
They simply refuse to do their job.
Refuse to work in a timely fashion.
Awful people.
This is corruption, yes? I mean... This is exactly what corruption looks like. I don't know another way to see this...
I'm spending all this time doing appeals and so on for the VC and Dean and so on and so forth... All these people paid in excess of $200,000 per year... Who don't seem able to calculate a GPA or deliver an assessment outcome for a 120 piont paper (1 academic year study) within 4 months.
Why can't they just do their job?
ffs.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 18, 2019, at 9:37:52
In reply to Re: admin, posted by alexandra_k on January 18, 2019, at 9:27:56
All I can do is make the changes within the 10 week time-frame, I realise.
Get it hard-bound.
Once I've submitted the hard-bound version they either accept it (f*ck knows how many months later) or they reject it. If they reject it then there is no 'pay us 6 months more fees and maybe we'll pass you later'. There is only accepted or not accepted at that point.
My supervisor said she couriered her comments so I'll wait a few days for them to turn up, make some changes, get it in.
I suppose it's possible they won't sort out things with Auckland until I've submitted the hard-copy.
I'm just f*ck*ng mad that people refuse to process my things normally. They refuse to offer me an interview with all the other people who are offered interviews. They say 'declined'. Then, after I spend several days trying to sort it out, two days after interviews have started, I get an interview. I don't get an offer of place with all the other people who are offered places. I get 'declined'. Then, after several weeks trying to sort it out...
It doesn't make me feel warmly / kindly towards these people, at all.
I mean... If they wanted me to think well of them, this is not the way for htem to be going about that.
The 10 week timeframe... It was something about making changes and submitting the hardcopy and it being accepted within 10 weeks.
So the idea is that I should pay 1/2 fees again to fund the fact that the university thinks it should allow someone 6 months to read it, again.
I'm supposed to pour an endless stream of money into them doing their jobs so slowly... So slowly... So slowly.... Such that I can only study part time. Because they're not capable of processing a full-time workload for a student.
What a f*ck*ng joke.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 18, 2019, at 9:42:03
In reply to Re: admin, posted by alexandra_k on January 18, 2019, at 9:37:52
Of course I'm just supposed to go away, really, so there is more room for their kids. And more room for kids who get to do it because they are less complain-y about taking the hits to better expediate the progress of their kids...
Deep breath...
These are the people who got chucked back...
Posted by alexandra_k on January 18, 2019, at 9:48:40
In reply to Re: admin, posted by alexandra_k on January 18, 2019, at 9:42:03
There will be an issue, I would imagine, where the University will not release completion information in time for the match.
There was something in the New Zealand Medical Journal about students feeling pressured to do invasive examinations (e.g., cervical) without having obtained informed consent. E.g., on women anesthetised for surgery for unrelated things. Or under situations where it wasn't clear to the student that consent had been obtained. They needed someone to sign off they had observed them doing the procedure, you see. For completion.
And so... What do you do?
The idea seems to be: You keep your head down and you huddle with the herd, and you give them no reason to single you out. Because they can just flunk you out of the program, or withhold your grade, and what are you going to do about that?
This is the culture.
And this is, of course, why training here and obtaining registration to practice in the civilised world is no small feat.
Because these things are fairly obvious no brainer unacceptable.
But they are *required* here as part of the whole branding / bonding thing we do where only the kids who are unacceptable to everyone else get to be promoted and revered as our best. Ooooooh mighty leader. Son or daughter of head administrator. Born to power.
Ugh.
I was worried about prostate exams, before. But apparantly the focus is largely on cervical exams. Newborns, in the first instance. Collecting the cells... Observing the progression of cervical cancers...
Posted by alexandra_k on January 18, 2019, at 9:57:03
In reply to Re: admin, posted by alexandra_k on January 18, 2019, at 9:48:40
Or not...
I don't know what administration is playing at, at this point.
It might be that they are seeing whether they can get me to self-implode.
That won't happen.
It might be that this is genuinely fun for them. That could be it.
I suppose it is possible that many or most students are routinely mis-processed and the only difference is that I'm standing up to it.
I suspect that is it.
I guess they are used to expediating the ones who have been properly trained to keep their heads sufficiently down.
I forgot how oppressive the culture was, at Auckland, particularly. No, here, too. The kids are scared. People in power seem to like to keep them scared.
I don't know that they would have any other student (or how many they would have) who elected to do more than 120 points in 1 year. I wonder if they genuinely did do worst 120 point GPAs all round...
They didn't process my enrolment in my thesis until May. 2 months later. It should have been done in 1 (uni Calendar) and could have been expediated (I actually thought they would because I actually thought they were comptent and good-natured people). But it's a 1 year program so now they don't want to say I'm done until May. But the academic year starts in late February. So they mis-processed it to make it take up 2 years.
I shouldn't have to wait 2 years while they figure out how to calculate a GPA
Posted by alexandra_k on January 18, 2019, at 11:08:13
In reply to Re: admin, posted by alexandra_k on January 18, 2019, at 9:57:03
as is the case... as is always the case in my life... i can't ask friends for help with any of this. they don't know how to help. they aren't able to say (well, except Damos, who is wonderful, honestly), but none of the other guys can say they don't know... but they are an ear. or whatever.
but sometimes i need something... and i go round and round and try and see my way out of it. but i guess posting here... sometimes people do know something to say that helps. sometimes they do. and here is an opportunity for that. i guess. that's why i post stuff here, still, sometimes.
i think it probably comes down to there being cohorts wihin the intake. pre-destined for different outcomes. they aren't supposed to know that, at the intake time... but that's the way that goes down. so there are a bunch of 'special entry' categories and the idea is that basically you are bonded. we don't say they are bonded, but we just sort of brand them, really, so it's next to impossible for the to get their way out.
for example, the Maaori people have been selected because they are acceptable to Maaori people. it isn't about equity for Maaori in the sense of a kid who is Maaori and smart and wants to be a doctor in the traditional sense getting to be a doctor. I really do not think that we believe in that, at all. The idea is to select students who are acceptable to Maaori so they can better persuade the Maaori to hand over their tissue biopsy samples (to just sort of do them / get them done as a matter of course -- if people aren't screaming 'no' then consent is implied) and having their immunisations and so on...
And the rural people are supposed to be GPs in rural communities for much the same thing. Again. Acceptable to the people.
And it seems like this is the Harvard endorsed thing. We hear a lot about Harvard this and Harvard that and I think this is the idea, here.
And so these students come through... And that's I don't know... 2/3rds the intake? Maybe 1/2... And they aren't supposed to be looking to overseas... They are supposed to come through here and spend however many years working in the public hospitals for the district health boards... And then apply to be selected to train as a general practitioner in NZ. And then go off into the smaller town rural regions and have some kind of general practice or allied health practice hub thing clinic where they are on call 24/7 for all the things so people don't go to the hospitals.
And that is one vision of medicine and what being a doctor is and lots of people want to do that and so that's fine as far as it goes.
And then I suppose there are the doctors kids. That probably means the GPs kids or maybe the general surgeons kids or.. I don't know... But these kids have their sights set on specialist training. As in, working in a hospital but as head of the unit. Or maybe workin in a hospital as one of a couple people who share being head of the unit.
NZ doen't much like this... Specialists.
Administration likes to pay for administration but not for specialists and not for the treatments that specialists can provide.
I don't really know about our private practice situation.
ACC (accident) is a source of funding...
Anyway...
They do this class division thing... And people have been inquiring about how they decide how to split up the class. How they decide to divide up the cohort and say where people do their placements.
I don't know... But it seems it's about putting like with like. So if you want to be a specialist you want to stay as close to the hospitals and university as you can. It would not be considered ideal to be shipped off to the rural communities with high need populations. I mean, you would get to practice more procedures when less supervised -- but you would get less supervision so you wouldn't actually be taught how to do things in a way that would be acceptable in the civilised world...
But what would they do with me?
My high GPA comes from Philosophy. And Psychology... Which is not so relevant. I have earned A's for relevant science -- but not on a full time basis, and other students have earned A+'s. It's clear to them I'm not a rural person but it's probably not clear to them that I am a hospital person / that I would fit with that cohort.
And they are thinking that people their (and nearly my) age are investing everything they can into their kids and their kids success.. And here I come saying 'I didn't have kids - I chose to invest in me' and they really don't like that. Don't know how to handle that. Don't know how to process that.
There's the whole line on 'stages of investment' or whatever that your bank sells you. About what you are supposed to be doing... About your mind-set... At diferent life-stages. People think of it as being like stages of rolling... Standing... SPeaking... For infants. Stages of learning to drive and having a boyfriend / girlfriend and graduating college and getting married and having however many kids...
And I opted out of that. Which makes people nervous.
They worry that I won't be controllable by the usual measures. Threaten to remove the exhorbatant salary. Threaten to move someone to a location where there is no adequate school for their kids...
And just the fact that people have regrets about their own lives. Have stories about what could have been. I say the people who got chucked back... But the people who quit working for their dreams and started doing something else. And there is some level of investment, sometimes, in my not doing things. To confirm beliefs they have about their own limitations.
I don't know.
Just let me f*ck*ng do it, already.
I don't understand how NZ isn't embarrassed about it can't even tell who is capable, anymore, and about how people won't even seem to let capable people get anything done. It's all about everythign being as slooooooooooooow as we can poooooosibly maaaaaaake itttt.
There never was anything wrong with me. It's an impossible country. It's awful here. And always, the people with the power have no f*ck*ng idea what they're doing / don't see how they make things worse. But will not listen to anybody else about what is good for them or what it is tha tthey need or anything else at all.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 18, 2019, at 11:22:52
In reply to Re: admin, posted by alexandra_k on January 18, 2019, at 11:08:13
i'm not even interested in politics, at all.
but they wouldn't let me do the science. they're too busy expediating their own kids through to let other people's kids catch up on the science in enough time to get the GPA...
so i went away and did part time for a while, to catch up, for sure. i mean, if other kids have done year 11, year 12, year 13 chemistry and physics and statistics before starting univerity then if i do one physics and one statistics paper in one semester (2 courses is part time) then what is my workload really given how much of it I need to catch up myself?
and then how do you compare the grades... when i'm pulling around B+ for my efforts... but a lot of my study time is spent trying to identify and fix up whatever it is that's missing... which... i don't know... and i don't have individualised tuition. though, to be fair, the tuition we had wasn't so amazingly helpful... the courses seemed mostly to be providing, like, a hundred or so worked examples (many similar to ones the kids at the better schools had already been doing for a few years) and I would get a bit side-tracked trying to 'understand' the lecture concepts, too...
and of course it turns out that it's not so relevant for med, anyway. and physiology concepts are much more... intuitive. and interesting to me. and learnable. and not anywhere near as mathematically demanding. or notationally difficult.
but people see i can write. and i do have views. and then they want me to play their game. but i don't want to play their game. the dean is into immunisation. we have high rates of rheumatic fever. they would like to develop a vaccination for the bug that we get here...
sure...
but i feel it can be a bit like propholactic antibiotics for chickens kept in unacceptable living conditions. i mean, one solution is to keep them in better living conditions so as to eliminate the need for propholactic antibiotics.
you start wanting to give different batches of vaccines to different people to see which ones are more effective... and then it's tempting to see about all kinds of other things, too.. i mean... why stop with differnt ways the bacteria is chopped up (for example). why not experiment with other things about the medium... or... who freaking knows. that's the point. who freaking knows what.
and when the dean says publically that all that's in the vaccination is the bug that's so obviously false. i mean... bugs just aren't that big but the sample that is delivered is bigger- right? i mean just so obviously false. there is clearly other stuff in there too. what other stuff is in there too?
the people don't have the right to know?
i just...
moving away from the people... yeah...
i would like to be a surgeon. in a hospital. somewhere with equipment so things can be steralised. i understand i'll likely need to do it myself. sigh.
please nz don't be as backwards as you pretend to be, for me, so much of the time.
:(
Posted by alexandra_k on January 18, 2019, at 11:28:07
In reply to Re: admin, posted by alexandra_k on January 18, 2019, at 11:22:52
but sure, get the people to take their shots.
'science communication' for the people, given the level of education of the people (even after they take 10 years + to do their 3 year 360 point degree) is 'there isn't anything in it except chopped up pieces of the bug!'
upload all the information to the foreign software systems. information about vaccination and batch number. information about presenting symptoms. information about prescriptions given. information about side-effects reported. uploading all the information.
thankyou very much for all your information. i'll just take a biopsy sample, and here's your shot.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 18, 2019, at 11:32:25
In reply to Re: admin, posted by alexandra_k on January 18, 2019, at 11:28:07
and the point is..
that that is the level at which things are at.
you would think there would be a rational dialogue or a discourse.
but there simply is not.
it's still the case of 'crazy anti-vacc cranks' vs 'there's only chopped up bits of the bug!'
the ethics discussion here was still the church party line on abortion.
and lots of odd talks by people who genuinely seemed to think that consent is the default unless you hear people screaming at you to stop, but even then pooh pooh rubbish rubbish most often that could and probably should be over-ridden.
and a strange one on how it would likely be better for everyone if we would not legisltate against organ sales, in this country. it would be better if people could buy and sell kidneys and like, here. instead of getting them illegally overseas.i am not interested in any of it.
it was just that i had to write the thesis for eligabilty. but now the f*ck*ng admin people who are all up in the politics think that i want to engage with them.
:(
Posted by alexandra_k on January 18, 2019, at 15:32:14
In reply to Re: admin, posted by alexandra_k on January 18, 2019, at 11:32:25
i just hope things get sorted out for me to start this year. and i'm worried about housing. i can't get the housing transfer request moving along until i have an offer of place. and that might well involve a month living out of a cheap hotel with the people fresh out of jail, as our government likes to do... and then getting used to, likely, a different part of the city. riding a motorcycle with the crazy commuter traffic likely along motorways.
i am disappointed that my things couldn't have been processed in a timely fashion. i should have been offered an interview without my having to contact people about why i wasn't... my thesis should have been accepted (subject to changes completed in 10 weeks) in time for me to be offered a place back in December.
but instead i'm required to chase things up. there isn't official policy i can see anywhere on a procedure to follow. you talk to one person and they blow you off or send you off talking to another person. it doesn't make me feel at all good about integrity or honesty or all those things. that it seems to be so much about the whims and vagaries of people in certain positions.
anyway... whatever...
i don't really know what it is about. well, it will be something about how my grades don't count because they are in irrelevant subjects or my grades don't count becuase they were a while ago now... there is always some reason, some excuse, why i don't count. why i'm illigtimate. why all the usual things don't apply to me. i'm sick of their excuses, especially when you see where the money goes and what they choose to do with the power they've got.
i do hold some hope that things aren't quite as bad as they seem...
but it was my goal all year to have completion by December 7. And it seemed to be the universities goal all year to not do that. no matter how I worked... they simply were not going to do that, for me. they were going to take 2 academic years to process everything more slowly than normal.
so they get 1 1/2 times the money for a one year qualification, you see.
it seems to be that.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 20, 2019, at 23:25:18
In reply to Re: admin, posted by alexandra_k on January 18, 2019, at 15:32:14
maybe i can get housing transfer moving along, anyway.
i am still f*ck*ng appalled at their incompetence / corruption. it is one or the other. or one and the other.
i don't know what they think the lesson is, here.
it reminds me of some article i read years and years ago in my first course in social and moral philosophy. there was this anti-pornography lady who used to write letters to the paper and so on anti-porn. and then she was apprehended by the police for importing all this porn. and she said that it was imported by her so she could better make some sort of case against importing porn.
and there was something 'methinks the lady doth protest too much' about it.
i'm sure people here think they are teaching me some kind of lesson.
but i think, in fact, they are more likely testing the limits of their incompetence / corruption.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 20, 2019, at 23:32:29
In reply to Re: admin, posted by alexandra_k on January 20, 2019, at 23:25:18
and it could well be something about the perception of risk and pay-off structures.
you know, their kids got their places in med last year, already, and they are ready for early retirement, now.
university will smooth things over on their way out in the interests of protecting their own reputation so saudi arabian sheep farmers will still pay hundreds of thousands of dollars for certain women to train to be doctors in english speaking first world country to better look after harem girls back home...
or similar.
i don't f*ck*ng care what it is.
i am f*ck*ng sick of people treating me like i'm an idiot imbecile and totally ignoring and disregarading and rubbishing and pooh pooh poohing everything i have got to say.
these awful people who can't even tell the difference between some illiterate psychopath and someone who is educated and genuinely morally inclined.
these f*ck*ng awful people.
someone said someting about 'these are the people who will inspire and motivate you...' well go on, then, do something inspiring or motivating. or, uh, do something psychopathic and idiotic and dismissive and corrupt and, uh, see the rewards that you come by in life!
i mean, what do you want me to say????
if you want me to respect your integrity: act with integrity!
whoda thunk!
Posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 18:58:41
In reply to Re: admin, posted by alexandra_k on January 20, 2019, at 23:32:29
maybe we don't want universities, anymore. maybe we don't want medical schools. we don't seem to be either willing or able to hire people to follow the rules.
i see the only reason people accuse me of not following the rules is that they aren't following the rules. that's a thing they do. externalisation, or whatever it is. instead of doing their job according to the rules they accuse me of trying to make them do their job against the rules when i'm trying to get them to follow the rules.
you know. like, i submit an application to the medical admissions committee. so the dean thinks that he can just remove it from the pile so it doesn't go to the committee. i mean, he's a person on the committee. in fact he's the head of the committee. in fact, we may as well just say that he is the committee and so he made the decision on behalf of the committee and i would be asking him to do his job improperly if he were require to bring things to the committee for a decision instead of simply making decisions on behalf of the committee.
and then the next year an administrator decided she had the power to dump my application on behalf of the committee. becuase she decides what gets to the dean, and he decides what gets to the committee, you see? you see how it goes and how it's all just them doing their job...
so i bring that to the attention of the dean. and he doesn't like that. for obvious reasons.
apparently there are policies / procedures. to be followed. from within the university and then from outside the university, too. from the government. i guess if the university wants money from the goverment that is what that is about. and if the government wants money from... the world bank. or whomever. to try and encourage civilisation.
and apparently it is part of these that the official people are supposed to inform you of what the process is and of reasonable timeframes.
but they don't / won't. they spout garbage. tell you falsehoods. if you say something that isn't right (to kind of see whether they put you right) then they don't. They will intentionally propogate the misinformation.
and part of the problem is that there are different sources of information. instead of their being clear statements of the policy and procedure in... in the University Calendar. an obvious place to look... they will try and 'explain it so someone incapable of parsing english' can understand - which sort of defeats the purpose. they try and rephrase it - but that always involves their altering the meaning. and so you get less official university webpages spreading false information that people come to accept as the rules. like, for example, saying that people 'invariably' take more than the minimum time to complete the qualiflication (which is only the case because the administrator people refuse to work according to the timelines they are required to work within).
which isn't acceptable.
i guess the 'within the last 5 years' requirement is to ensure people have seen what the brain drain has done to NZ. or the corruption. it is hard to tell whether people intentionally profit from the ineptitute or whether it's an unintentional sort of benefiting. the incentive structures are mostly towards ineptitude for many.
if you can convince people that they are incompetent / inept / incapable and so they just stick around throwing money at you...
we shouldn't be allowed to take international students.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 19:07:07
In reply to Re: admin, posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 18:58:41
we shouldn't be allowed to have universities if we can't play by the rules.
we wouldn't be allowed to have medical schools.
hospitals.
wait...
no kidding.
well bring on in the foreign military so the locals can have their shots and so the tourists don't get sick!
and train up a few of the locals to collect up the biopsy samples and give the people their shots.
bring on in the computer systems so all the data.. all the data.. hey what a wonderful experimental population! they don't look after each other at all! nobody will stick up for their interests!
the whole country is just tower of babble. not because people worked together especailly well and achieved anything at all. it's hard to see how the people ever will, at this rate, though.
maybe it is a mindset they are trying to teach me.
if you wait for other people to notice your competence / give you permission then that is never going to happen, here.
the only way is by forcing them to accept you. by forcing them to see that they have no grounds for not accepting you.
if they can find anything, anything, anything at all... anything at all.. anything at all... so they can get you to give up or go away or give them money or... anything at all... they can get you feeling badly about your height or your weight or your nose... they can get you feeling badly about your age or your grades or your family or your... anything at all. they can beat you because they found you alone in the corner and they had opportunity! anything at all... because they managed to accuse you of sexual harrassment or racism or sexism or being mean or anything at all... anything at all... the people just go around kick kicking at everyone they can for anything at all...
such friendly people!
tis the kiwi way!
i don't know why people choose to live like this.
awful people.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 19:23:27
In reply to Re: admin, posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 19:07:07
apparently it's the people with power. when you get close. when you are percieved as a threat to their power. they turn nasty. so you try not to make it personal. but they likely will. anything at all. anything at all. they have the people they want the places to go to. it will never be me. anything at all anything at all anything at all. it isn't about disability or age or gender or anything systematic like that. it is just them searching about for anything at all.
i think the idea is that it makes their own look better and brighter.
there is this thing, though. this idea... whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger. the idea of testing testing trial by fire.
i guess i think of the immune system. and slummy housing. does that make the immune system stronger or just wear people out and keep them down?
apparently slums do result in...
the immunologically elite.
i found that somewhere.
an old book.
mostly... i found it crappy. but that was brilliant.
the immunologically elite.
e.g., amongst an AIDS epidemic... where AIDS is endemic... you find some individuals who, despite repeated exposure, don't get sick.
the immunologically elite.
then you take up samples and so on from them. then manufacture that for people who can afford it.
without the countlessly many dying of AIDS...
you would't find the immunologically elite in a timely fashion.
you wouldn't get it to market so swiftly for the...
financially elite. i guess.
anyway...
i don't know if people are testing / showing me how to get justice in this country. i guess i have to belive they are. and that things will come through for me over the next month.
i guess things really have come to a head with respect to potentially just how f*ck*ng corrupt things may be, here.
this year...
it is as f*ck*ng clear as clear as clear can be. if i do not get offered a place it is because they did not follow their own policy / procedure. they have no grounds to deny me.
it's probably only becuase they thought my GPA wasn't good enough that htey let me do well on interview.
i heard that somewhere... people who do worse on GPA tend to do better on interview.
it will be interesting to see who did get in via supposedly 'competitive' routes. more particularly, just how much of a whos whos kid it is. and what school they went to. i'm sure they taught them to keep their head down...
i could care less. i just want to get on with the f*ck*ng job, already.
i guess it is teaching me to find the policy that (when followed) gets things to teh highest level people the fastest. because most admin people are not so competent and they waste your time.
it is a surprise to me, genuinely, how many people seem to find reading / following policy / procedure to be hard.
i do know this is why we don't have more operations and so on in the public sector.
wash your hands.
doesn't happen. and that's just the start.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 19:49:11
In reply to Re: admin, posted by alexandra_k on January 20, 2019, at 23:32:29
And it's just an awful situation, all around.
I suspect they think they don't need to follow the rules because I've gamed the system somehow in retaining my GPA over the years, despite the very best efforts of Auckland and Otago and WELTEC to ruin my GPA.
Only, what I did was what I was required to do to retain my GPA.
And I think it was actually that they attempted to act against the interests of the people / society by attempting to set up rules that would swiftly and irrevokably cull out people who weren't in the know about the way things are.
The way things are... Being that first year at University (for Med entry) is designed so as to be mostly revision for people who went to good schools and did science there, and mostly impossible for people who did not.
The way things are... Being that there is no way for students who did not go to good schools and do science there... To do those things so as to have the opportunity later in life.
There is no do over.
Unless...
Unless you study part time. Because part time status doesn't count for your GPA. Becuase you could just do 1 course and get an A+ and have a 9.0.
But the flip-side of that is that part time status doesn't count for your GPA. So if they are going to fail you for a course then you drop back to part-time status. So they can't give you a fail for one course which irrevokably f*cks up your GPA.
I wish the system wasn't the way it is. With trying to scam people. With not providing people with a genuine pathway so that they have the opportunity to earn competitive entry to a degree that is supposed to be competitive entry and merit based.
Unfortunately, it's just a competitive entry degree for the kids of people in the know who are basically purchasing the cheapest medical degree in the english speaking world they can for their kids -- largely because the government picks up the bulk of the bill. that means they can save their college fund to get their 19 or 20 year old undergraduate kid sitting the Step 1 (after 2 years at med school). saving for the other steps and so on...
But not having to pay for a US college undergraduate degree.
Or graduate entry Medical degree.But that's the 'best' kids NZ was able to put forwards for match, you see.
Mostly by way of kicking at and preventing everyone else.
Especially those with genuine merit.
Who didn't get non-aborted earlier in the system.
You see?
Posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 20:25:18
In reply to Re: games, posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 19:49:11
It is probably not clear...
Medicine is an undergraduate degree in this country.
First Year is fairly open entry but entry to second year is competitive.
There are basically 3 entry pathways.
There are two on the basis of first year. They have in common 4 subjects - cell bio, anat and phys, epidemiology / public health, organic chemistry. The rest of the subjects are biological physics and biochemistry for the 'biomed' pathway and sort of public health-y population health and health psychology for the 'healthsci' pathway.
The population health stuff is weird... I have done some statistics and I have previous background with psychology (including social and clinical)... The stuff here is something else... It's 'informal' reasoning or something that... Often doesn't make any sense by people who have not studied statistics or psychology.
The other pathway is graduate, on the basis of previously completed degrees - where the degrees must have been completed in NZ.
There are around 280 domestic places.
Around 40 for Maaori and pacific islanders
Around 50 for students from rural secondary schools (as best I can figure, including rurally located boarding schools)
Around 50 competitive entry graduate
Around 150 competitive entry from first yearI think the breakdown is something like the above. And they are sort of quotas for Maaori and pacific and rural origins (I'm pretty sure rural origins was the 'trade' for Maaori - I would be surprised if it wasn't a reward for wealthy people sending their kids to rural boarding schools to reduce pressure on inner city schools, if possible... I mean I know they want us to believe it is about serving the needs of rural communities, but I have no reason to believe them to be altruistic...)...
So...
Then they don't actually say how many grads vs first years. I guess they can make their rank list and experiment with different numbers of grads vs first years until they get most of the kids they want and cut out most of the kids they don't want...
So then we have a cohort. And a bunch of them are 19. And they have basically been selected in on the basis of their Secondary Schooling. Because the biomed curriculum really rewards students who studied those subjects well at good Secondary Schools. And it is basically impossible for students who didn't. But just in case a student from a non-traditional background is looking like they might make it... You can fail them for an essay in Population Health. Just so they don't get in, you see. If they don't have the foresight to flee (if they remain with full time status) they will have irrevokably f*ck*d up any chance of doing Med. A fail on your GPA is not something that can be recovered from.
So they failed me.
SO I dropped back to part time and fled.
There was nothing else to be done, given that people were blustering and thumping and refusing to follow University Complaints procedure and the people hired to help over at the Students Union... Well... They surely pick the most incopmetent ones they can find for those kinds of jobs. Unintentionally??? Yeah, right.
The Government pays the bulk of the bill to train the Med students. So we have these 19 year old second year students doing the cheapest undergraduate level medical degree in the english speaking world.
They don't have a 4 year (not even a 3 year) undergraduate degree in science (or anything else) behind them.
But they are second year Med students. And after 2 more years of both science and case-based learning they'll be in the hospitals.
FAIMER listed Auckland as 'graduate entry'.
But most of the people coming out of Auckland Medical School do not have previous degrees. It is an undergraduate level degree.
They expediate their kids because it's cheaper that way, I guess.
They don't have to pay for an undergraduate degree.
They don't have to pay for a graduate medical degree.
They may have to contribute towards the cost of their undergraduate medical degree (but they have organised surprisingly many scholarships for their own kids).
So most of their money they can spend on US accreditation.
Which really doesn't seem fair.So now the problem has to be... That if this is the cheapest medical degree in teh English Speaking world why wouldn't US students go do this cheaper one (even if they pay international student fees it would be considerably cheaper than a US 4 year degree BEOFRE the cost of a US medical school degree)...
So I guess they call it 'graduate entry'.
And they say you have to have completed a degree in NZ first.
But there is this 'from first year' entry route...
And then they sort of go 'aw! better luck next time! Stick around and you can apply again in only 2 years!'
Only they will make sure you fail one of your papers so you will be culled.
There doesn't seem to be any integrity.
Expediating the kids through isn't good for anyone.
It's not good for those kids.
They don't get the chance to decide what they want to do with their lives. Whether Medicine is something they want to work for, or not. They don't get to follow what they are passionate about... Do a degree in cell biology or neuroscience or whatever... They don't get to study the arts for fun. What little exposure they get to it is mostly designed to get them screaming back to Med. At least that was the slice that I could see from here... Not least because that is our exposure to the Arts generally... It is not something we value, here...
Out education system got so f*ck*ng crappy.
The worst of it is they can't even tell the difference between merit and the lack of it. Half the people whose job it is to decide think it is just about picking the ones with the... Cutest eyes. Or f*ck knows what.
Social experiment round 2: Giving it back.
Sigh.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 20:39:05
In reply to Re: games, posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 20:25:18
I guess it's about getting through the ones whose parents fuckign well make you get them through. I guess it's about that.
I guess it's about them likely not sending out many offers of place and seeing who complains and how they complain and seeing which of the complaints to the Government they need to fend off if they want to keep getting those government funds...
F*ck knows.
I don't believe anything anymore.
I used to post to this website... Used to read from there, too.
Only, the people weren't that great, really. When I started having a hard time with being failed for Population Health papers it was like the vultures saw the weakness to pick pick pick pick pick... With friends like these... You know how that goes... I started to wonder whether people were posting honestly, or whether people were posting falsehoods (e.g., like the bodybuilding sites where people lie about their lifts for the kudos)... I started wondering whether people were trying to psych other people out, and so on... I think it likely that was the case...
More recently I read from there and have reason to believe a couple things to be 'baiting' me to jump back in with a rant about them calculating GPA's incorrectly this year.
One person posted that they calculated their GPA to be (something lower than) how their GPA was calculated for their entry offer. Only... How the hell would they know what their GPA was calculated for their entry offer? When you get offered a place you do not question how they calculated your GPA - you just accept your offer. It is only if your place is declined that you ask (and they may tell you) how they calculated your GPA. So it's a... Weird kind of a baiting thing to say... Unless they were declined, their parents queried, they got an offer by over-calculating the GPA...
F*ck knows...
Just stay away from all the b*llsh*t that you get because it's a program that has 19 year olds doing it...
We don't have classes for adult students to get a High School education in subjects like Calculus and Statistics and Biology and PHysics and Chemistry.
People here seem genuinely to believe that the abiltiy to acquire this is a feature or function of the young mind. If you don't learn it at whatever part of your development then it is gone forever.
Whatever whatever whatever nonsense that they spout to justify why their own kids get expediated through...
I wonder how many of those very young kids wash out. I think it is most of them...
Then GPs in RC's (general practitioners in rural communities).
It can never be about freedom... Freedom to pursue your own ends.
Everybody else has got a stake. Gets to stick their oar in.
No freedom.
No equality.
No justice.At all.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 20:50:09
In reply to Re: games, posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 20:39:05
There is no way that I should have been failed for Population Health.
There is no way that I wrote a first year essay that was worth only 30 per cent, for 20 per cent of the entire course.
I went to all the lectures. I did all the readings. I studied.
How it is possible that a student who only previously achieved A grades for arts and social sciences.. How is it possible that I suddenly come up with such complete and utter garbage for a degree that is 'first in family' and all of that...
How is that possible?
Answer: There is no university.
Another NZ University... A politician was not allowed to speak there, last year. Apparently because he has been deemed, on the basis of previous things he has said, to be 'racist'.
So, by calling someone 'racist' you are able to deny them freedom of speech in a university or academic context.
What he said that was suppose to be 'racist' was that he was opposed to Maaori thinking they had the birthright to the upper hand.
It was something to do with elite Maaori thinking they had the right to the things elite non-Maaori have... He denied that... They thought that was racist. Of course Maaori elites should be able to expediate the passage of their own children - just the way the elite non-Maaori do!
But now we trade-back for 'rural origins'...
And things just go from bad to worse to a state of war.
It's such a thin veneer...
I guess if yuo don't have the capacity to work... If you never got shown how to work. To take pride in things worked for.
This might be fun.
I don't know.
I suspect it's mostly about youth. Something about kamakaze males.
That's why they die young. THey didn't save for teh future.
High risk. Short life.
It's a way to live.
To the detriment of us all...
Posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 20:55:10
In reply to Re: games, posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 20:50:09
We get to the VC's anyway. I belive they are on around $400,000 per year or $600,000 per year or something like that.
That would hire a few post-doctoral fellows.
That would hire a few junior lecturers to lighten the teaching load to allow for research time.
That would fund a few PhD students or MPhil students or MA students.
While still providing a more than adequate living wage for these high level officials, of course.
I wonder if they can organise for the people in their institution to correctly calculate a GPA, to provide an outcome for a theis in accordance with University Regulation, all within a reasonable time so I don't have to spend a year of my life... Waiting for admin...
I wonder if they can acknowledge receipt of an email within 3 days.
I wonder if they can resolve things in under 20.
Ineptitude doesn't ring true when you consider how much they are paid.
And what do they do with their money, anyway?
And why don't they hire people who are competent?
Posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 20:58:05
In reply to Re: games, posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 20:55:10
I mean...
Their job is to know what the regulations are - right?
To get people to follow the regulations - right?
The Dean was like 'you can't just calculate your GPA however you want to!' and I was like 'That's right, I can't, but neither can admin. The virtue of the way I calculated it was that it was in accordance with the rules on how you are supposed to calculate it'.
How much do the pay the Dean?
What is his job?
ffs
Posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 21:17:05
In reply to Re: games, posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 20:39:05
And no, they are not trying to teach me to folow the rules.
I am a rule follower.
And not in a Tourettes or OCD kind of a way (good try!) but in a genuine kind of a 'doing what it is that you are f*ck*ng well suppose to do' kind of a way.
It is everybody else who doesn't seem to think the rules apply to them.
-- If they can get away with it!
And they do get away with it. I guess that's the thing.
There is something about how you have to stand up for your rights. But then you need the information on what it is that you are supposed to do. Justice is suppose to be accessible to everyone. But then the information on what people are supposed to do in the face of injustice is supposed to be accessible to anyone. But I have a hard time finding the policy / procedure / regulations...
I guess that is the thing. Start out locating the policy / procedure / regulations. THen follow those.
Most people actually cannot do that. Most people seem to have genuine difficulty parsing / rephrasing in a way that doesn't alter the meaning.
I suppose I have found odd bits where I have worked back through something I was working on and realised I mis-did something here, or there. I find systematically, reliably, and repeatably, that when I err it is on the side of caution (for me), however. I err on the side of making my case to be less or worse or err on the side of giving others the benefit of the doubt. That is because it is better for me (I reckon) to know and expect on the basis of, not reach or hope.
Anyway...
I guess this is an important lesson.
Accreditation and regulation. People in NZ will always be trying to tell me I can't, I won't, I'm not eligable, I'm not allowed, it can't be done and so on and so on becuase that is the awful way...
Most people can't do the accreditation / regulation thing because they don't locate the information and then they don't value it the way they should (they will go with word of mouth instead)...
I just need to focus on what I need to do and do it... Not pay attention to them.
Whether it is intentional or unintentional. I expect a large portion is unintentional. It's a lot harder than I tend to think it is. It is only as easy for me as it is after years and years and years of study and critical thinking about difficult text and so on... And it is still hard... I make errors too...
I'm getting a sense of the differences in the cohort.. How many are set up to fail from the get-go...
I... Have a chance... I studied Biochem. Part time. Physics. Statistics. More cell biology. Higher level stuff too. Pathology. Step 1 review for basic sciences is teh perfect level review text. I actually have a chance.
I am sad that more students don't.
I am sad that Med isn't a graduate only degree.
I am sad that our degrees aren't 4 year degrees with breadth requirement.
I am sad that the people responsible for grading cannot tell which students have worked hard on their papers and don't see fit to reward the hard work of intelligent people - and help people understand the sorts of things they need to see for better grades (where that isn't just 'parrot back to me this piece of mis-information that I just told you about equity or about population ill-health or about unhealthy food and whose to blame' and so on politial b*llsh*t...)It's an experiment in whether hierarchical people can evolve into something... Productive... With educated people with technology and with culture and so on...
Whether it is imperialistic / colonial (in a bad way) to try and enforce values like freedom, equality, and justice for all.
Maybe people can produce things sustainably within a society that is not free, equal, and where there is no clear statement of justice (either becuase things update with no record - like oral tradition pre-writing or where writing is constantly revised with no timestamp)...
Maybe it would be uncessarily imperialistic / colonial to think that equality, freedom, justice are 'better' than alternatives.
Maybe the Maaori culture will develop from a different set of values and will end up with high-end co-operativity (or slave arrangements) that produce rockets to the moon (or to Australia) or whatever. Secure internet connections.
We can apply for a greencard lottery from here. I guess that's the best you can do. I think you need 6 months or maybe 1 years funds so as to be financially not a burden on arrival (fair enough) but really..
What more can you do for the people??
sigh.
sigh.
I can't belive I discovered the american dream. lol.
Still... A lot of people want to to go America not for what they can do for America but more for what America can do for them... People want the stuff they see on TV...
But all the things that are involved in it's production. The laws and regulations and the system of accountability. For education and for medicine...
I want to help contribute towards teh best in the world. The development of civilisation at athe fronteir.
REinventing the wheel for people who refuse to look at the blueprints countless people have made and made free-f*ck*ng-ware of the axle... isn't my idea of fun.
arrrrrgh
Posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 21:17:40
In reply to Re: games, posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 21:17:05
except the 3 post rule.
ahem.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 21:40:58
In reply to Re: games, posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 21:17:40
that is why it means something to me that Bob is reluctant to make alterations to the posts on this site.
i do understand that the way things are in europe and the us right now the focus is more in 'individual rights' and the idea that the best way forwards for individual rights is for each individual to have control of the content they produce...
but different individuals have different kinds of control over the content they have produced.
sometimes the best way you have of controlling it the way you want -- is for you to give it to someone else.
for example,
someone from the VC's office sent me an email that i am sure they greatly regret. i can no longer find it in my inbox! that is odd! maybe gmail grants some kind of administrator priority to business customers, or similar!
fortunately, i forwarded the email to various parties...
which meant i had alternative record of it so i can continue to site it (with reference to the time and date i received it).
i have noticed that. emails from administration are revised... the solution seems to be to spam a paper trail... forward things, extensively quote things, keep spamming the paper trail...
in a country where rules and regulations are not readily accessible. where rules and regulations are often not stated in clauses intended to be simple with numbers so it is easy to refer to particular sections...
in a country where whatever the biggest mob (or person with power to prevent things from going to the mob) gets their way...
the idea of a permanent record.
if people respond you can see what they are responding to.
there is no baiting then someone takes the bait and then the bait is removed. then the person baited get slammed. 'crazy'. irrational response from out of the blue.
permanent record.
there are goods and ills of both systems... synthesise them...
spamming to the permanent record is what is needed here now given teh way things are here now. for me.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 21:46:23
In reply to Re: revision, posted by alexandra_k on January 25, 2019, at 21:40:58
the Maaori culture was based on oral tradition.
you don't write down who owns what, who made what, who owes what to who...
you have the orator of the tribe. a firstborn male or something. they remember. they will remember. they will decide.
you can see the pros and cons of this system - right?
you can see how it could well lead to people stopping producing because the biggest bully will take the product and if the orator says that's okay then what you gonna do? wait until you grow into being a bigger bully?
so you could have a written record and that would be progress...
but how about a written record that you can alter whenever... you... want. whoever you are.
that'd be handy - right?
so we have a culture becoming more willing to embrace the written word.
written on software systems...
we still haven't invented paper.
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