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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 8 of 8. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Toph on March 29, 2008, at 20:27:15
What is it that allows us when watching some movies or reading certain novels to separate from reality and fall into the author's world? Suspended disbelief is the willingness of a person to accept as true the premises of a work of fiction, even if they are fantastic or impossible. At least temporarily we fall in love with a character, we feel intense hatred for a fictitious villain and we cheer a heros triumph as if were our own. To some degree suspended disbelief is a phenomenon that occurs here on Babble as well. Participation in this cyber community is frequently filled with assumptions, acts of faith, trust, attachments, rivalries, loves, friendships and any number of intellectual and emotional experiences that, in part, involve the suspension of disbelief. We convince ourselves that a whole host of things are true - that we have anonymity, that posters are honest about themselves, that the information they share is accurate, that participation itself is a benign act and maybe even helpful. We even suspend certain realities about ourselves such as veracity of who we portray ourselves to be in anonymity, and that time spent here is more valuable than time spent on work or with our families.
For me, suspended disbelief on Psycho-Babble has allowed me to believe, at least while Im here, that being chronically mentally ill is not so bad, that I can be helpful to someone Ive never even met in person, that people care about me despite my faults, and that I have learned some valuable lessons about communicating with others.
With fiction, returning to reality is usually as quick and effortless as closing a book or listening to someone talk loudly in a theater. If the story is especially compelling or traumatic the suspension of reality can linger as with Wells War of the Worlds, all the empty beaches after the release of Jaws or the nightmares I had after viewing the Exorcist all those years ago.
I guess for me, I dont want all the countless hours that I have spent here to be an entertaining illusion of fiction. I need it to have value. I want the posters to be who they convey themselves to be. I hope that the information I seek is accurate. I want to believe that the administrator is always making choices based on the best interests of the individuals here and not because of some professional advantage. And I want to believe that this reality, while staged in an artificial room, has been of real benefit to me and not merely a suspension of disbelief.
Toph
Posted by Dinah on March 29, 2008, at 22:24:00
In reply to Suspended Disbelief (long), posted by Toph on March 29, 2008, at 20:27:15
I guess I see it more as a leap of faith.
In order to get as much from babble as possible, we decide to believe that many people are honest about who they are, and that they mostly mean well and try to tell the truth as they know it, and that the administrator's behavior is for the most part based on integrity and genuine interest in the welfare of participants.
And if we're lucky, we also realize that we'll be hurt, people will lie, people might not always mean well, might even play games, and that the administrator is totally and completely human and will let us down.
I was explaining dialectical behavior therapy. Is that a dialectic?
I'm not sure that we mean anything all that different, although we're using different terms. Certainly there are enough people that are all the good things we hope, that it is not a fiction. But neither is it the whole of reality.
Hopefully our time here isn't *more* valuable than time spent at work or with families. Hopefully this is an add on, like any other way of spending time.
I've met people here that I've had enough contact with to believe I know them pretty well. But even if I found out tomorrow that this was all in my mind, it wouldn't have been without value. I have changed from my time spent here, in ways that I think are often for the better. That can't be without value.
It sounds as if you are saying you've gotten things from Babble that are yours to keep for yourself, no matter what?
And isn't any social interaction a leap of faith? People offline hide who they are, and hide their motives. One of the many reasons that my childhood goal was to be the weird dog lady, a suburban hermit.
Posted by muffled on March 29, 2008, at 22:39:36
In reply to Suspended Disbelief (long), posted by Toph on March 29, 2008, at 20:27:15
the people are real.
That was a way cool post. Thank you.
Thats why I like it that babblers meet IRL, it adds a dimension of reality.
But then....
I got a dissociative disorder!!!!! ROFL!!!;-)
Sorry, that just struck me as funny!
But seriously, I really appreciated your post.
It was beautiful.
Thanks.
Take care,
M
Posted by Sigismund on March 29, 2008, at 22:53:17
In reply to FWIW I beleive its real.... » Toph, posted by muffled on March 29, 2008, at 22:39:36
I was reading about people who have a secret need to be found out, and wondered if part of the attraction here is that one can be much more direct than one would ever think appropriate IRL.
I really feel I have known people here, and it doesn't bother me that the knowledge is partial, of the parts of themselves they choose to display.
That would always be the case.
Posted by Phillipa on March 30, 2008, at 12:31:21
In reply to Re: FWIW I beleive its real...., posted by Sigismund on March 29, 2008, at 22:53:17
I can't lie as then I really wouldn't sleep. I let it all hang out so to speak. And don't understand a lot so ask questions like I did in school. I trust others too. Bad I guess on the internet. Phillipa a bit off topic.
Posted by muffled on March 31, 2008, at 0:01:08
In reply to Re: FWIW I beleive its real...., posted by Sigismund on March 29, 2008, at 22:53:17
> I was reading about people who have a secret need to be found out, and wondered if part of the attraction here is that one can be much more direct than one would ever think appropriate IRL.
>
> I really feel I have known people here, and it doesn't bother me that the knowledge is partial, of the parts of themselves they choose to display.
>
> That would always be the case.*I think it is quite standard that people wish to be 'known', and accepted....
Sometimes I think we see the very best of people here....its nice.
I think we all hide parts of ourselves from others, whatever the situation.
Its made me feel better to know others here don't put me down when I am stupid and stuff, thats been huge to me.
They don't seem to mind that sometimes I a bit odd.
Yup.
Been good all right.
:-)
M
Posted by karen_kay on March 31, 2008, at 14:06:54
In reply to Suspended Disbelief (long), posted by Toph on March 29, 2008, at 20:27:15
Posted by Toph on April 5, 2008, at 0:05:52
In reply to FWIW I beleive its real.... » Toph, posted by muffled on March 29, 2008, at 22:39:36
Thanks for the kind words muffled. I suppose that no matter which side of reality you happen to be on at a given moment its best to try and have the attitude that all our experiences have meaning and value as difficult as these experiences may often seem.
This is the end of the thread.
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