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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 10 of 10. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by rjlockhart04-08 on August 2, 2011, at 14:47:46
My doctor is an addiction specialist doctor. And alot of the resources that I used to have are not used anymore like benzodiapines and stimulants. I suffer everyday because of the choices that I made of abusing presciption drugs and then being exposed to the public about it. I tell ya, its humilating to confess to people that I am an addict. And most of my drugs where given to me throught professional doctors. I have anxiety during the day and the only close thing I can do to get a drug is go to an NA meeting. I go to NA meetings everyday and live the 12 stepprogram. The reason I don't post to babble much as I did is because I feel helpless in my sitaution that I can't ever find doctor that will compasionatly treat me. I used to, but no longer because I abused and wasted all that I had when I should of considered what the outcomes would be for the future. Much of my addiction controls my life and my thoughts of using. BUT i must admit that I am powerless over my addiction and my lif has become unmanagable which it has and always has been. I want to say to you that there is hope in these times of suffering with me. Havingfaith and believing someday will be better will come evnetaully. Suffering is a human condition and you can't fight it.
Moving on. The plan that I have is to move out and get my own doctor that will prescibe what I want. But sooner or later i always know that my addiction will kill me. I have seen people die taking to many narcotics. Actually there was a poster here that took barbituates. benzos, amphetamines and he died. And that just goes to show you what addiction will do when it is maniested in its fullest potential. It will kill you. It's a illness. That's why its very hard to not think of drugs when times are tough. But your life is more valbable. So the best thing I can do is suffer each day knowing I have the gift of living over death. And I cherish that.
Logging out...I love you all.
Matt
Posted by Christ_empowered on August 2, 2011, at 17:00:50
In reply to It really sucks when you classified as an addict, posted by rjlockhart04-08 on August 2, 2011, at 14:47:46
In the name of "helping" the "addicted," I think the mental health profession often does more help than good. "Once an addict, always an addict." Right? I'm not so sure. I was called an addict at one point by a psychiatrist, only to end up with a better shrink (who knew my history and carefully prescribed benzos for a while) a couple years later. I don't have the urge to pop Adderall or downers, and I certainly don't get into trouble pursuing the next "high" or "hit."
I can't help but wonder if all this "I'm an addict and I always will be," this so called "acceptance" stage of addiction treatment, isn't doing more harm than good. I mean, reading your letter, you talk about how your addiction will be the death of you. Why do you say that? Personally, I think a lot of your problem is that you're currently stuck with a doc who treats you like an addict and reinforces this idea that you're always going to be a certain way. It doesn't have to be that way.
I had drug "issues" (I call it "excessive use," not "addiction," but...whatever), and I got over it despite being labelled and mistreated by the mental health industry. And of course they're going to be especially hard on Rx drug users/patients; do you think psychiatrists want to admit that a lot of what they do is prescribe addictive drugs to vulnerable people, potentially setting them up for trouble down the road? Hell no my friend. They'd rather blame it all on you, possibly add more diagnoses to your records, and let that be that. Because, after all--there aren't any bad *psychiatrists*, just bad/manipulative/disordered "mental patients" out to get a fix.
Posted by rjlockhart04-08 on August 2, 2011, at 19:18:26
In reply to bullying 'addicts', posted by Christ_empowered on August 2, 2011, at 17:00:50
Yes, I am trapped in this state of mind that I am going to be always to be an addict. It's just the way I was taught at NA meetings because they explian how deadly addiction is but really when I think about it. It didnt bring me near death it brought me near very unpleasant experiences that I had when I abused presciption drugs and also pleasant expiences too that I wish I could recall. The thing is prescitions are NOT ment to make you feel better, there prescribed for medical reasons but many people abuse them to manipulate how they feel. It's easy, its effective, its done all the time. Where I have been is not that serious BUT everytime I ever say that In NA meetings they always say yes it was serious and your lucky your alive. It's not a big deal that I abused medications. The main publicity thing I ever had was my mother telling the doctor that I was abusing them and then she told the rest of the world. Many doctors started seeing me as a an addict. If I kept it undercontrol and never told anyone maybe that would of been a better choice. I suffer alot because I don't have the medications that I think I need but see there I go again with self prescibing things to change the way I feel. I have to be an addict because that's what they do. But also other people do this very thing everyday and its just not heard of because they don't tell.
I admit it. I don't think this is serious but the NA program has shown me I never have to use again. Alot of times I will google diffrent types of narcotics just for fun to see what the reviews of them are how they make you feel. I just have to get on with reality that I can't have these drugs that I want because I'm an addict. I am in the postion where I have very low resources for medications because my mother tells them not to prescibe them. And you know. I have to get on my own away from her but this has been around so long its very old to talk about with babble because I clearly didnt listen to people when they told me to get out of this place back around 2006-2007. People actually posted direct instructions on how to get out. And I should of listen to them but there is just so much things that I am scared of because my mother bullies me with medicaition. She won't even let me have pain pills for my tonsils being removed unless the doctor says its absolutly needed. This is my life like this and it is absolute sh*t. I have to live with this because I have tried so many times to argue and control things that I can't control. And I need a freind that will be there to come get me but my resources are limited. And I don't want to waste people's valuable time when they tell me to do something and I don't do it.
That's all.
But thank you for posting. Maybe you can give me advice on what to do about this, yet i don't want to waste you time by not listening and not taking action about the obstables that are in my way.
Matt
Posted by rjlockhart04-08 on August 2, 2011, at 19:21:06
In reply to this is my current life situation. Please read., posted by rjlockhart04-08 on August 2, 2011, at 19:18:26
Posted by emmanuel98 on August 2, 2011, at 19:56:12
In reply to It really sucks when you classified as an addict, posted by rjlockhart04-08 on August 2, 2011, at 14:47:46
I'm glad you're going to NA meetings. In 12-step programs, they say only 3 things are necessary -- don't use, get a sponsor and go to meetings. Do you have a sponsor you can call every day? When I first got sober (from opiates and alcohol) I called my sponsor daily and I also called tons of other people I barely knew just to talk it out. I made a lot of dates for coffee and lunch and dinner. Still do. Fellowship is the key.
Posted by brionk on August 2, 2011, at 23:47:57
In reply to this is my current life situation. Please read., posted by rjlockhart04-08 on August 2, 2011, at 19:18:26
Why waste your time torturing yourself learning about different narcotics and how they make you feel? Of course they make you feel good, even great maybe...for a while. NA helps you to realize that it is a loser's game. You play, you lose. Work everyday on recovery, abstinence, and your life will unfold in front of you with infinite possibilities. And please think about this: What (who?) is really the greatest "obstacle" to your recovery. Work hard; be courageous. You can do this! Best Wishes. Brion
Posted by sleepygirl2 on August 3, 2011, at 20:23:14
In reply to bullying 'addicts', posted by Christ_empowered on August 2, 2011, at 17:00:50
you made a good point.
the cure offered will also cause problems down the line, tolerance, difficulty lowering the dosage
addicted to it? hmmmm.....I never abused my benzos (except for my stupid overdose).
I am addicted to pot though (lame). Benzos are only a temporary cure, and I am on a dose much lower than I took just about about 6 months ago. I take only one third of what I was taking, 1.25 to .5. Let's guess why?Well, that's all well and good, but I am still anxious as hell, so what the hell else is new?
I'm not blaming anyone. I believe that my treatment peeps are doing what they see as in my interest. I'm not coping, that's my fault. I know that. I could do better at taking care of myself. So, I have to do that. I get so tired of feeling uncomfortable.
Posted by Christ_empowered on August 4, 2011, at 10:41:53
In reply to Re: bullying 'addicts' » Christ_empowered, posted by sleepygirl2 on August 3, 2011, at 20:23:14
Hey man, if I could smoke up without getting paranoid, I'd be all over it. Natural, safe, effective (for many people--just not me); what's not to love?
I know in my situation what bothered me was that I was a vulnerable teenager given controlled substances...and then when I was dependent on them, it was "addiction" and, of course, it was all my fault. That's pretty lame.
I'm not saying uppers and downers are evil or whatever, but I am saying that they can cause problems and its not necessarily because the patient is "disordered" or whatever. My last psychiatrist apparently thought I'd outgrown my drug misusing phase, so she carefully Rx'd benzos w/o any issues. Other docs seems convinced that once you've been labelled an "addict," you'll always be a drug user...which makes me wonder: why go into addiction medicine if that's your outlook?
Anyway, excessively long rant...thanks for your post.
Posted by brionk on August 5, 2011, at 1:02:10
In reply to bullying 'addicts', posted by Christ_empowered on August 2, 2011, at 17:00:50
I agree you should not use a psychiatrist to diagnose or treat an addiction. NA and AA have by far the best of all programs for saving addicts' lives, and providing them a road to a lifetime of recovery. It's hard to argue with success. Just my observations having worked as an addictions counselor for years. Regards. Brion
Posted by utopizen on August 8, 2011, at 12:20:10
In reply to Re: this is my current life situation. Please read., posted by brionk on August 2, 2011, at 23:47:57
yoga is more potent than people want to believe. laugh now, but it's worth the time.
This is the end of the thread.
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