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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 10 of 10. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Buckeye Fan on October 6, 2004, at 8:37:27
Hi to all,
I was very public on this site when I discontinued my use of AD's back in June. I was determined to try the natural route, and be AD-Free for the first time in several years. I was able to do OK for 3 months (June, July and August)Unfortunately I began to experience a growing depression late in August, that kept getting worse
and was unlike anything I have ever experienced.A week and a half ago I went began taking Zoloft
again, as it helped me so much in the past with contolling my anxiety, panic attacks, racing thoughts and extreme social anxiety.Although its too early to tell how well it will work this time, I have already begun to feel better than I did.
So far the main side effect for me right now is
feeling very wired, and trouble falling asleep ( plus, as I said...the depression hasnt completely
lifted...but its not as bad.)Though I feel like I have failed in my attempt at being drug free...I think this is the first time I have ever experienced REAL debilitating depression that had me close to the non-functioning , I had read so much about.
Thank you Dr Bob for this website...and to those who post their experiences...as they have helped me.
Wish I could be posting a happier theme...but I wanted to be honest and report my inability to handle the depression on my own, drug free.
Hopefully these side effects will subside over the next few weeks, and I can get back to living and functioning as I have for the last few years.Buckeye Fan
Posted by saw on October 6, 2004, at 9:07:18
In reply to Need to be honest....maybe this will help someone, posted by Buckeye Fan on October 6, 2004, at 8:37:27
When my depression returned this year, I fought it for as long as I could before realising that I just wasn't going to get it right without medication. This gave me many feelings of failure and guilt that I couldn't go the self help route. I still wish I didn't *have* to take medication.
My doctor said that just as a vehicle requires fuel to keep it going, the medication would be my fuel. I felt a bit better after that.I understand exactly how you are feeling. Please don't beat yourself up because of the AD's. The fact that you need to take them is not your fault. You are just receiving valuable assistance.
(A couple of days ago I posted that I have had enough of Effexor :) - I should listen to my own advice)
Look after yourself
Sabrina
Posted by Bill LL on October 6, 2004, at 9:41:12
In reply to Need to be honest....maybe this will help someone, posted by Buckeye Fan on October 6, 2004, at 8:37:27
It's really hard to tell if one can successfully stop their medications. I think it's mostly a trial and error thing.
Posted by woolav on October 6, 2004, at 14:55:43
In reply to Re: Need to be honest....maybe this will help someone, posted by Bill LL on October 6, 2004, at 9:41:12
I am glad you realized that you had to get back on medication. Its not the end of the world. I had done the same thing as you about 6 yrs ago, and actually made it about 2 years with no meds before completely falling apart. I was thinking of suicide everyday and then realized i had to get help. I have accepted the fact that my brain has a chemical imbalance. And that has helped me come to terms with everything. I have also decided to see a therapist in conjunction with my pdoc to see if i can learn some CBT that will help me if/when i try to get off meds again...
Good Luck to you.
Sandy
Posted by Colleen D. on October 6, 2004, at 14:59:45
In reply to Need to be honest....maybe this will help someone, posted by Buckeye Fan on October 6, 2004, at 8:37:27
If we don't take risks in our lives, we miss out on the opportunity to learn and grow. I wish you the best even though you aren't AD-free. You've helped me out several times here on the board and I want to say THANKS and GOOD LUCK!
Colleen
PPD, GAD and OCD
Posted by Denise1904 on October 6, 2004, at 16:28:09
In reply to Need to be honest....maybe this will help someone, posted by Buckeye Fan on October 6, 2004, at 8:37:27
Hi,
It's good that you have come on here and told people that. I came of antidepressants about 6 or 7 years ago, was doing ok for about 3 years, I'd forgotten what depression was really like and then wham bam like a ghost come back to haunt me I starting getting really suicidal and went through two horrible years of trying to find a drug that would work even just a bit.
I'm not sorry I came off them although when I was going through that horrible time I really regretted ever coming off them but who's to say I might have ended up depressed again even if I'd stayed on them.
What I find really annoying though is people who come off them and like ex-smokers suddenly start becoming anti-anti-depressants. I think some people take them feel better and somehow kid themselves that they actually beat the depression on their own and that they didn't really need the drugs after all. That annoys me so much.
Denise
Posted by olysi79 on October 6, 2004, at 21:49:37
In reply to Re: Need to be honest....maybe this will help someone » Buckeye Fan, posted by saw on October 6, 2004, at 9:07:18
Same thing happened to me this year, except I was in a mixed episode so I became obsessed that the drug companies had somehow "done something to me chemically"... I'm better off with medication and I know that now.:)
> When my depression returned this year, I fought it for as long as I could before realising that I just wasn't going to get it right without medication. This gave me many feelings of failure and guilt that I couldn't go the self help route. I still wish I didn't *have* to take medication.
> My doctor said that just as a vehicle requires fuel to keep it going, the medication would be my fuel. I felt a bit better after that.
>
> I understand exactly how you are feeling. Please don't beat yourself up because of the AD's. The fact that you need to take them is not your fault. You are just receiving valuable assistance.
>
> (A couple of days ago I posted that I have had enough of Effexor :) - I should listen to my own advice)
>
> Look after yourself
> Sabrina
Posted by Buckeye Fan on October 7, 2004, at 8:06:43
In reply to Re: Need to be honest....maybe this will help someone » Buckeye Fan, posted by saw on October 6, 2004, at 9:07:18
Thank you for ALL your kind responses.
I know this we dont know each other, and come from different parts of the world...but somehow it is comforting to exchange experiences with others who have "been there"....even if it is in cyberspace.
As many have posted on this board before, Doctors, friends, spouses, etc...do not REALLY understand what it is like to have a psychological
disorder/ imbalance unless they have actually experienced it. I know when I share things with this website, you guys are living through it, and can relate.Thanks again for taking the time to encourage.
BF
Posted by invisiblemanpa on October 7, 2004, at 17:21:58
In reply to Re: Need to be honest....maybe this will help someone, posted by Buckeye Fan on October 7, 2004, at 8:06:43
thanks for the excellent post...it has given me some great food for thought as I am getting off Effexor and thinking about Zoloft....Depression, Socail Anxiety, GA.......
e
Posted by Optimist on October 8, 2004, at 16:02:46
In reply to Re: Glad you said this., posted by Denise1904 on October 6, 2004, at 16:28:09
> Hi,
>
> It's good that you have come on here and told people that. I came of antidepressants about 6 or 7 years ago, was doing ok for about 3 years, I'd forgotten what depression was really like and then wham bam like a ghost come back to haunt me I starting getting really suicidal and went through two horrible years of trying to find a drug that would work even just a bit.
>
> I'm not sorry I came off them although when I was going through that horrible time I really regretted ever coming off them but who's to say I might have ended up depressed again even if I'd stayed on them.
>
>
> What I find really annoying though is people who come off them and like ex-smokers suddenly start becoming anti-anti-depressants. I think some people take them feel better and somehow kid themselves that they actually beat the depression on their own and that they didn't really need the drugs after all. That annoys me so much.
>
>
> DeniseIt's incredible how antidepressants can give that illusion that you beat it yourself though. I've felt like that in the past. I also think I have a cyclical depression so that contributes to it as well. I've basically resigned myself to the fact that I will probably be on AD's for the rest of my life. I've explored nutritional and exercise possibilities up the wazoo and realized that I probably have a biological tendency towards depression. A lot of my family and and extended family are on them.
I find the idea of staying on AD's long term comforting though. It makes one feel less guilty thinking it's a character flaw that's causing it. I don't discount the usefulness of cog/behav. therapy though. I believe it has it's place as well.
This is the end of the thread.
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