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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 11 of 11. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by wharfrat on November 19, 2002, at 10:32:10
I've been on Lexapro for 8 weeks now and it's been quite the miracle drug for me. (first time on antidee's), however, the dreaded SSRI sexual side effects have finally caught up with me. At first I thought it would be just a matter of mind over matter and side effects are different with everyone and I would never have a problem with THAT!! I was wrong. I have no sex drive, no desire, don't even hardly think about it anymore.
This has been a nice little vacation for my wife seeing as how I've chased her around the house like Pepe LePew for the past 17 years, but, I think she's starting to feel a little undesireable (I told her that these side effects are typical with these meds). My question is this. If this is what it's like to be normal, do normal people have a low sex drive. For example, my wife is a very well adjusted normie I think, no mental problems (except for me), very upbeat, basically a Polyanna, but she very rarely is in the mood for sex. Basically I can have sex anytime she wants to. So, is she an example of a normal person and people that are horny all the time (like I USED to be) have a disorder and need medication or is it that I'm getting well and people that are well don't have a great sex drive?
Does this make any sense? Do I have to make a choice between sex or well being? Does anybody know?
Wharf
Posted by Eddie Sylvano on November 19, 2002, at 11:07:45
In reply to Lexapro and Libido, posted by wharfrat on November 19, 2002, at 10:32:10
>Do I have to make a choice between sex or well being? Does anybody know?
----------------Lemme know if you find out the answer, because this problem has been ruining the best relationship I've had in years. Women don't like it when you never initiate sex with them, and then can't really accomodate them when they do.
As far as whether or not horniness is a form of disorder, it seems unlikely. The fact that ADs depress sex drive is probably more a demonstration of the fact that current ADs aren't all that surgical about their receptor interactions than it is evidence of a correlation between sex drive and depression. For that matter, before I ever began taking meds, I recall dperession alone did a good job of knocking out my libido (along with my drive for most everything).
Every girl I've had a relationship with seems to have 10x the drive that I do, which would be great for anyone else, but generates a huge problem for me. It ultimately makes it impossible for me to both have a relationship and be functional. There are only so many times that you can explain to your partner that it's not anything about her, rather it's these drugs, see. None of them have ever taken ADs, so they don't understand. Aside from that, they're also kind of put off by the fact that you're taking meds to begin with.
It's interesting, too, that some drugs take away your physical ability to have sex, some take away your desire to ever do so, and some do both. If anyone ever makes a drug that both fights depression and enhances sex drive, they'll rule the world.
Posted by wharfrat on November 19, 2002, at 11:27:43
In reply to Re: Lexapro and Libido » wharfrat, posted by Eddie Sylvano on November 19, 2002, at 11:07:45
Eddie,
Thanks for the input. After I'd been on lexapro for a month I went back to my Doc to let him know how the med was working. At that time my sex drive was like it always had been It was just taking me a long time to orgasm. Sometimes I would just get worn out before I could get off.
Anyway, he said if it did'nt get better he has heard that Wellbutrin helps. I guess I'll have to try it. I'm really not into taking a bunch of meds, but what choice to I have?
Thanks again
Wharf
Posted by fairnymph on November 19, 2002, at 16:13:45
In reply to Lexapro and Libido, posted by wharfrat on November 19, 2002, at 10:32:10
Is your wife on hormonal birth control?
> I've been on Lexapro for 8 weeks now and it's been quite the miracle drug for me. (first time on antidee's), however, the dreaded SSRI sexual side effects have finally caught up with me. At first I thought it would be just a matter of mind over matter and side effects are different with everyone and I would never have a problem with THAT!! I was wrong. I have no sex drive, no desire, don't even hardly think about it anymore.
> This has been a nice little vacation for my wife seeing as how I've chased her around the house like Pepe LePew for the past 17 years, but, I think she's starting to feel a little undesireable (I told her that these side effects are typical with these meds). My question is this. If this is what it's like to be normal, do normal people have a low sex drive. For example, my wife is a very well adjusted normie I think, no mental problems (except for me), very upbeat, basically a Polyanna, but she very rarely is in the mood for sex. Basically I can have sex anytime she wants to. So, is she an example of a normal person and people that are horny all the time (like I USED to be) have a disorder and need medication or is it that I'm getting well and people that are well don't have a great sex drive?
> Does this make any sense? Do I have to make a choice between sex or well being? Does anybody know?
> Wharf
Posted by wharfrat on November 19, 2002, at 16:38:04
In reply to Re: Lexapro and Libido » wharfrat, posted by fairnymph on November 19, 2002, at 16:13:45
My wifes on no birth control. I had a vasectomy 5 years ago. Maybe I made it sound like she's fridged. Let me put it this way, if I suggested sex 4 times during any given week, she might be in the mood one of those times. We do have busy schedules, kids in the house and she's an office manager with alot of responsibilities and employees. When we can get rid of the kids for a night and relax things are different. The problem now is MY libido. For all I know she might attack me tonite, but will I be in the mood? Probably not. I feel like an old neutered cat.
Wharf
Posted by Donna Louise on November 20, 2002, at 6:49:21
In reply to Re: Lexapro and Libido » wharfrat, posted by fairnymph on November 19, 2002, at 16:13:45
I have been taking Lexapro for about 8 weeks. I had some sex drive and function while on 10mg but none now that I am at 20mg which I seem to need for the anxiety aspectI once again have no sex drive. I like this drug other than the emotional numbing (not nearly as bad as paxil though) and the sexual dysfunction. All the SSRI's do this to me but seem to be the only ones that work for depression and anxiety for me. My question, has anyone tried adding Buspar to counteract these side effects? I am trying 10mg twice a day. Nothing yet but it has only been a week on 5mg twice a day for a week and a couple days on the full dose. So far I just feel lethargic from it.
Posted by MarathonMom on November 20, 2002, at 20:44:18
In reply to Lexapro and Libido, posted by wharfrat on November 19, 2002, at 10:32:10
I couldn't agree more wharf. Why is it that we have to choose between sexual fulfillment and mental well-being? Life can be a bitch.
About 2 weeks ago I stopped being able to orgasm at all, which puts a strain between my husband and I. I see my doc tomorrow we are planning to discuss adding an additional medication to alleviate this unwanted side effect. I will let you know what she prescribes and how well it works.
As far as your wife having a low libido, I definitely think most men (NOT on antidepressants) think about sex continually. It's in your nature and we women need to accept that. I personally enjoy (or used to anyway) the hell out of sex, but my husband did quite a bit of work to ensure that. I find that men typically like frequent, quick gratification, but that women like the whole drawn out process of being made to feel like absolutely, positively THE most special and beautiful woman on the face of the earth. Most men just don't have the patience for this every time (my hubby is the exception). As a result, most women don't get off during "quickies" so therefore we have come to associate them as merely "servicing his account" rather than the meaningful communication more intimate sex provides. Do you agree?
Posted by wharfrat on November 21, 2002, at 8:17:18
In reply to Re: Lexapro and Libido » wharfrat, posted by MarathonMom on November 20, 2002, at 20:44:18
> I couldn't agree more wharf. Why is it that we have to choose between sexual fulfillment and mental well-being? Life can be a bitch.
>
> About 2 weeks ago I stopped being able to orgasm at all, which puts a strain between my husband and I. I see my doc tomorrow we are planning to discuss adding an additional medication to alleviate this unwanted side effect. I will let you know what she prescribes and how well it works.
>
> As far as your wife having a low libido, I definitely think most men (NOT on antidepressants) think about sex continually. It's in your nature and we women need to accept that. I personally enjoy (or used to anyway) the hell out of sex, but my husband did quite a bit of work to ensure that. I find that men typically like frequent, quick gratification, but that women like the whole drawn out process of being made to feel like absolutely, positively THE most special and beautiful woman on the face of the earth. Most men just don't have the patience for this every time (my hubby is the exception). As a result, most women don't get off during "quickies" so therefore we have come to associate them as merely "servicing his account" rather than the meaningful communication more intimate sex provides. Do you agree?MarathonMom,
Yes I do agree, and my wife and I do have (or had) the long drawn out foreplay/marathom sessions
and we had those morning quickies as well. But it's been 2 weeks now and now it's time for her cycle so I'm looking at 3 weeks now. I have'nt gone that long without sex since our last child was born 9 years ago. I've got to see the doc about this. I can't imagine from reading some of these post that switching from some of these other SSRI's to Lexapro has increased some peoples libido. But I've never been on any others except Lexapro. What to do? What to do???!!! Please, please let me know about your Dr. visit
Thanks,
Wharf
Posted by wharfrat on November 21, 2002, at 8:47:14
In reply to Re: Lexapro and Libido, posted by wharfrat on November 21, 2002, at 8:17:18
Posted by sjb on November 21, 2002, at 14:14:00
In reply to Re: Lexapro and Libido, posted by Donna Louise on November 20, 2002, at 6:49:21
My experience was very similar to DL. I actually had increased desire when I started on Lexapro at 10mg. Was surprised to find myself even thinking about sex once-in-awhile after NOTHING for years on all the other stuff.
However, when I went up to 20mg, it was the same 'ole familiar story. Sex, what's that? Why do people want do that? Orgasm?!-fuhgetaboutit. I started to loose a lot of hair, too. But if you're not interested in getting laid anymore, who needs hair?
Seriously, I'm forturnate that my husband is well educated on ADs and takes none of this personally. He also is very sweet "not to notice" my weight gains, aging, etc.
I'm now off all ADs and things are starting to "wake up." I'll probably crash, depression wise, if history does indeed repeat itself. I'm holding out all hope on fish oils! (Hey, a girl can dream, right?)
However, I don't think it will ever be like it was (sex, that is). But who/what has/was? I used to look a lot better, too. What the hay.
Posted by MarathonMom on November 21, 2002, at 19:31:27
In reply to Re: Lexapro and Libido, posted by wharfrat on November 21, 2002, at 8:17:18
Wharf,
Hey. I know that 3 weeks is a long time in guy time to go without getting laid. "Hang" in there, my friend. You'll find a solution. In the mean time, try to find another outlet for that sexual energy!
My Psych doc this morning recommended, are you ready? Ginkgo Biloba to counter the sexual side effects. She has some research on a study and also data from her own practice. Take the recommended amount on the bottle, titrating up to 200+ a day. And go to a healthfood store and get a good brand. Walgreens will not do here when your sex life is at stake!!!!
She's had a success rate of 91% in women and 76% in men. I b-lined for the health food store on my way back to the office today and took 120 mg immediately and another 120 mg tonight. She said it could take a few weeks for my stores to build up and for me to notice an improvement. If you hear me screaming all the way in Texas, you'll know it works!! (Kidding) I'm in FL so that's a bit far.
Anyway, I will keep you posted on my progress. Orgasm or Bust. That's my motto. Good luck to you.
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