![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 12 of 12. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by zarathustra on September 8, 2001, at 21:07:47
My name is Andrew, I've posted many times before.
My doctor tells me I suffer from depression, and that I rationalize to myself by making the world out to be the disgusting, animalistic, evil place that it is.
I've tried many med, I'm currently on Paxil 50mgs and Chlorodiazepoxide 20mgs T.I.D.: Its not working, I think I'm going psychotic. My mood will swing from the depths of hell to the heights of heaven, daily. I cant remember ANYTHING (I have real difficulty recalling yesterday). I'm getting so angry at everyone and everything, not my normal anger, but this absolute hatred of everything. I'm bored, I do nothing but drive around toronto for hours on end because nothing at all gives me any pleasure. I thrive on others misfortunes. And I am the most sarcastic individual you will ever meet. My friends however, see the opposite: they see a wonderfull sensitive caring person who thinks to much, Why is my perception of myself so distorted?Another new problem that has arrisen is money. For example, I have wanted this camera for years the Nikon f100, last week I spent 2500$ on it, only to return it for a refund today!?! My previous interest in photography is gone (interest in everything for that matter). I did the same with a new computer a few months ago, I got all excited, spent about two grand for it and got rogers@home internet. What did I do?
I turned around and sold it in the paper!
I feel like I am going insane. I have no hope I keep falling and falling and falling. I been to those useless institutions called hospitals, who get a textbook regurgitating crisis worker to tell you it will get better.I am going to kill myself soon. and it dosen't even upset me. Its like I have accepted this is the way life is. I'm so screwed up I don't even quite no how I feel, or If I'm happy or sad. How do I get myself admitted, do I have to shoot myself first, before they will pay any fucking attention to me?
Question: If I am manic or hypomanic, would paxil be causing these wierd mood fluctuations?
What if I just have a better insight into life than the rest, and I can see it for truly what it is: irrelevant, there is no meaning for our existence, we are just ants in anthills. How can anyone in there right mind believe in god? I tend to think religion is the sanctuary of the weak and ignorant.
I am just rambling out all my thoughts in hopes that someone understands what it feels like, or can tell me "yes Andrew, you are fucking nuts"
As I have said in past postings, I am deemed gifted, in the 99th percentile, I'm not bragging, I'm actually ashamed because I am a 26 year old highschool drop out
loser. Are "genius" (so to speak) and insanity really connected?
I want to run away sooooo bad, If any one out there is willing to admit me or refer me, I will drive ANYWHERE.
I was going to go and hide out in the Rockies to relax, but of course that one never came to fruition.
I sometimes think my work dosent help (actually I'm on a four month medical leave of abscense right now because it burnt me out) I work in a group home for abused children, and the occaisonal Autistic. I should be happy, although it is stressfull, it should be very fullfilling, it is to my co-workers.
I can't listen to the radio anymore. It makes me sick, The stupid morning shows and all of these "manufactured" bands. I feel like everyone in the world has had the wool thrown over there eyes but me.
Really, the world is a rotten place, full of greed, hatred, hunger, death, poverty, war, famine, drought.
To have a positive attitude towards life is to be deceitfull to oneself.Love is nothing but neurons and seratonin which (hopefully) keep us alive long enough to procreate. When it fails or malfunctions, Suicide occurs.
Thank you all for letting me vent
sincerely
Andrew.
Posted by SalArmy4me on September 8, 2001, at 21:51:50
In reply to PLEASE, SOMONE HELP ME, I'M FALLING TO PIECES., posted by zarathustra on September 8, 2001, at 21:07:47
I can help you a lot man. Talk to me. I'm SalArmy4me on AOL Instant Messenger
Download AOL Instant Messenger here: http://www.aol.com/aim/homenew.adp
Posted by emma lee on September 8, 2001, at 23:47:42
In reply to PLEASE, SOMONE HELP ME, I'M FALLING TO PIECES., posted by zarathustra on September 8, 2001, at 21:07:47
Andrew, I'm emma, just found this site. I CAN relate to your problems, especially how your friends think you're something you don't think you are. Do they try to "help" you? do they even know what's going on with you? mine don't and they all pretend they know what's best for me. I get so angry sometimes so i yell and scream and say things i know i'm going to regret. this is how i've been dealing with my anger lately, is this wrong?? what do they do?they call me Manic. this makes me yell more. All i know is that life is worth living, at least in my eyes, and i have tried to kill myself but it hurt too much. Is that a reality check or insight into what a nerveless senseless chicken i am.? Hell, you have friends in this wierd fucked up cruel bluecollar world you haven't even met yet, so try not to be rash. You've got life to live, places and people to see, I think that's worth living. ~emma~
Posted by emma lee on September 8, 2001, at 23:56:01
In reply to PLEASE, SOMONE HELP ME, I'M FALLING TO PIECES., posted by zarathustra on September 8, 2001, at 21:07:47
i reread your message, man I really know what you're talking about. especially about religion. Fuckit. that's what i say. but don't get me started. write to me, maybe we can be friends.~emma~
Posted by Tony P on September 9, 2001, at 1:25:44
In reply to PLEASE, SOMONE HELP ME, I'M FALLING TO PIECES., posted by zarathustra on September 8, 2001, at 21:07:47
I'm not a doctor, but what you say about yourself sure sounds like you're losing touch with reality - psychotic, as you yourself said, likely manic/depressive. Considering the feelings you're reporting, the drugs you're taking sound totally inadequate to me.
Have you told your doctor - MD or pdoc - how you're REALLY feeling - just like you told us? I know I sometimes tend to minimize the bad stuff when I talk to my MD, and even sometimes to my counselor. Print your own posting out and take it with you to your next appt. - either for the Dr. to read, or to remind you what you need to say to him/her.
And get a second opinion from another doctor - most drs. are quite open to this and will refer you to a specialist, which usually makes it OK with medical plans.
Love is more than serotonin - its caring for another person's wellbeing, and I care about you even though I've never met you. Suicide is so very permanent, and there almost certainly is help available to you if you find the right way to ask - or insist.
Tony P
> My name is Andrew, I've posted many times before.
> My doctor tells me I suffer from depression, and that I rationalize to myself by making the world out to be the disgusting, animalistic, evil place that it is.
> I've tried many med, I'm currently on Paxil 50mgs and Chlorodiazepoxide 20mgs T.I.D.: Its not working, I think I'm going psychotic. My mood will swing from the depths of hell to the heights of heaven, daily. I cant remember ANYTHING (I have real difficulty recalling yesterday). I'm getting so angry at everyone and everything, not my normal anger, but this absolute hatred of everything. I'm bored, I do nothing but drive around toronto for hours on end because nothing at all gives me any pleasure. I thrive on others misfortunes. And I am the most sarcastic individual you will ever meet. My friends however, see the opposite: they see a wonderfull sensitive caring person who thinks to much, Why is my perception of myself so distorted?
>
> Another new problem that has arrisen is money. For example, I have wanted this camera for years the Nikon f100, last week I spent 2500$ on it, only to return it for a refund today!?! My previous interest in photography is gone (interest in everything for that matter). I did the same with a new computer a few months ago, I got all excited, spent about two grand for it and got rogers@home internet. What did I do?
> I turned around and sold it in the paper!
> I feel like I am going insane. I have no hope I keep falling and falling and falling. I been to those useless institutions called hospitals, who get a textbook regurgitating crisis worker to tell you it will get better.
>
> I am going to kill myself soon. and it dosen't even upset me. Its like I have accepted this is the way life is. I'm so screwed up I don't even quite no how I feel, or If I'm happy or sad. How do I get myself admitted, do I have to shoot myself first, before they will pay any fucking attention to me?
>
> Question: If I am manic or hypomanic, would paxil be causing these wierd mood fluctuations?
>
> What if I just have a better insight into life than the rest, and I can see it for truly what it is: irrelevant, there is no meaning for our existence, we are just ants in anthills. How can anyone in there right mind believe in god? I tend to think religion is the sanctuary of the weak and ignorant.
>
> I am just rambling out all my thoughts in hopes that someone understands what it feels like, or can tell me "yes Andrew, you are fucking nuts"
> As I have said in past postings, I am deemed gifted, in the 99th percentile, I'm not bragging, I'm actually ashamed because I am a 26 year old highschool drop out
> loser. Are "genius" (so to speak) and insanity really connected?
> I want to run away sooooo bad, If any one out there is willing to admit me or refer me, I will drive ANYWHERE.
> I was going to go and hide out in the Rockies to relax, but of course that one never came to fruition.
> I sometimes think my work dosent help (actually I'm on a four month medical leave of abscense right now because it burnt me out) I work in a group home for abused children, and the occaisonal Autistic. I should be happy, although it is stressfull, it should be very fullfilling, it is to my co-workers.
> I can't listen to the radio anymore. It makes me sick, The stupid morning shows and all of these "manufactured" bands. I feel like everyone in the world has had the wool thrown over there eyes but me.
> Really, the world is a rotten place, full of greed, hatred, hunger, death, poverty, war, famine, drought.
> To have a positive attitude towards life is to be deceitfull to oneself.
>
> Love is nothing but neurons and seratonin which (hopefully) keep us alive long enough to procreate. When it fails or malfunctions, Suicide occurs.
>
> Thank you all for letting me vent
> sincerely
> Andrew.
Posted by stjames on September 9, 2001, at 2:12:18
In reply to Re: PLEASE, SOMONE HELP ME, I'M FALLING TO PIECES., posted by Tony P on September 9, 2001, at 1:25:44
Sounds to me like BP, which the AD (paxil) have brought to a head. the rapid mood swings, anger, and spending sprees are all hallmarks of BP.
It is easy to miss BP and think one has just depression. Perscribe an AD. It is well known that
AD's alone in BP tend to make thing go to hell. Start cyclying. Exactually what is happening to you now. It is also not uncommon to discover one is BP and not jst depressed due to this kind of reaction.I am just a lay person, so this is just food for thought. What is important is that you consult with your doc on Monday about this, without fail.
What is your opinion of your doc ?
james
Posted by San on September 9, 2001, at 2:54:35
In reply to PLEASE, SOMONE HELP ME, I'M FALLING TO PIECES., posted by zarathustra on September 8, 2001, at 21:07:47
> My name is Andrew, I've posted many times before.
> My doctor tells me I suffer from depression, and that I rationalize to myself by making the world out to be the disgusting, animalistic, evil place that it is.
> I've tried many med, I'm currently on Paxil 50mgs and Chlorodiazepoxide 20mgs T.I.D.: Its not working, I think I'm going psychotic. My mood will swing from the depths of hell to the heights of heaven, daily. I cant remember ANYTHING (I have real difficulty recalling yesterday). I'm getting so angry at everyone and everything, not my normal anger, but this absolute hatred of everything. I'm bored, I do nothing but drive around toronto for hours on end because nothing at all gives me any pleasure. I thrive on others misfortunes. And I am the most sarcastic individual you will ever meet. My friends however, see the opposite: they see a wonderfull sensitive caring person who thinks to much, Why is my perception of myself so distorted?
>
> Another new problem that has arrisen is money. For example, I have wanted this camera for years the Nikon f100, last week I spent 2500$ on it, only to return it for a refund today!?! My previous interest in photography is gone (interest in everything for that matter). I did the same with a new computer a few months ago, I got all excited, spent about two grand for it and got rogers@home internet. What did I do?
> I turned around and sold it in the paper!
> I feel like I am going insane. I have no hope I keep falling and falling and falling. I been to those useless institutions called hospitals, who get a textbook regurgitating crisis worker to tell you it will get better.
>
> I am going to kill myself soon. and it dosen't even upset me. Its like I have accepted this is the way life is. I'm so screwed up I don't even quite no how I feel, or If I'm happy or sad. How do I get myself admitted, do I have to shoot myself first, before they will pay any fucking attention to me?
>
> Question: If I am manic or hypomanic, would paxil be causing these wierd mood fluctuations?
>
> What if I just have a better insight into life than the rest, and I can see it for truly what it is: irrelevant, there is no meaning for our existence, we are just ants in anthills. How can anyone in there right mind believe in god? I tend to think religion is the sanctuary of the weak and ignorant.
>
> I am just rambling out all my thoughts in hopes that someone understands what it feels like, or can tell me "yes Andrew, you are fucking nuts"
> As I have said in past postings, I am deemed gifted, in the 99th percentile, I'm not bragging, I'm actually ashamed because I am a 26 year old highschool drop out
> loser. Are "genius" (so to speak) and insanity really connected?
> I want to run away sooooo bad, If any one out there is willing to admit me or refer me, I will drive ANYWHERE.
> I was going to go and hide out in the Rockies to relax, but of course that one never came to fruition.
> I sometimes think my work dosent help (actually I'm on a four month medical leave of abscense right now because it burnt me out) I work in a group home for abused children, and the occaisonal Autistic. I should be happy, although it is stressfull, it should be very fullfilling, it is to my co-workers.
> I can't listen to the radio anymore. It makes me sick, The stupid morning shows and all of these "manufactured" bands. I feel like everyone in the world has had the wool thrown over there eyes but me.
> Really, the world is a rotten place, full of greed, hatred, hunger, death, poverty, war, famine, drought.
> To have a positive attitude towards life is to be deceitfull to oneself.
>
> Love is nothing but neurons and seratonin which (hopefully) keep us alive long enough to procreate. When it fails or malfunctions, Suicide occurs.
>
> Thank you all for letting me vent
> sincerely
> Andrew.>Andrew, did you ever think that your lack of faith or belief in God could be your problem? I have a long history of depression, with mnay drug trials, hospitalization, and ECT. I believed the world was an awful place then and I still do, but since then, I have drawn closer to God and He has worked wonders in my life. He gives me strength to make it through this life and hope for life eternal in Heaven away from this mess down here. Why don't you give it a try--what do you have to lose??? God bless you-San
Posted by JohnL on September 9, 2001, at 6:27:55
In reply to PLEASE, SOMONE HELP ME, I'M FALLING TO PIECES., posted by zarathustra on September 8, 2001, at 21:07:47
One word my friend.....Zyprexa. Talk to your doctor about it. Ask for it. Actually, three words....Zyprexa or Risperdal or Lamictal.Reduce the dosage of Paxil down to 20mg, plus or minus, and add 5mg to 10mg of Zyprexa. A second choice would be Risperdal in the 1mg range. Another good choice would be Lamictal, increasing dose no faster than 25mg every four days with 200mg being your target.
A significant population of people with bipolar disorder, possible bipolar disorder, depression and/or mania respond very well to Zyprexa or Risperdal. As a matter of fact, some doctors in the know are now successfully treating patients with Zyprexa monotherapy as a first line choice for bipolar symptoms. As a second line choice, if that doesn't do the trick then they add a small dose of an antidepressant to it.
While standard mood stabilizers such as Lithium, Depakote and Tegretol are still the bread and butter drugs for most psychiatrists, those having the most success are instead using Zyprexa, which is FDA approved for bipolar. It has antidepressant qualities, antimanic qualities, and mood stabilizing qualities.
One more option would be Lamictal. It has mood stabilizing qualities as well as antidepressant qualities.
The above are suggestions to take to your doctor. Out of the entire confusing world of drugs to choose from, I think you would be way ahead in the game to limit that universe to just Zyprexa, Risperdal, or Lamictal, in addition to reducing the dose of Paxil.
John
Posted by Marie1 on September 9, 2001, at 8:58:03
In reply to PLEASE, SOMONE HELP ME, I'M FALLING TO PIECES., posted by zarathustra on September 8, 2001, at 21:07:47
Andrew,
Please give some consideration to the above posts re: different meds and such. I'm just a consumer in the mental health game and don't pretend to know what may be right for you. As you know, though, there are many people on this board who do know what they're talking about. That's probably why you've bothered to post here.
Your post really touched me- I can relate to so much of how you feel. Your view of the world and the god thing and mine are pretty much in sync. You're miserable and I honestly do know how you feel. I *had* a brother who kept a journal that sounded remarkably like much of what you wrote above. I have often wondered too if there is some correlation between giftedness and mental illness (I hope you don't mind the implication here). My gifted brother, unlike you, kept his pain all bottled up; he never tried to get help. We were all shocked when he killed himself. Shocked and horrendously saddened. Andrew, the people you'll leave behind will never really get over it if you follow through on your idea to suicide. PLEASE remember that. PLEASE keep trying to find the answer to your pain here. My brother had little to no exposure to the mental health world and as a result didn't think anything could be done to help him. You ARE aware of the possibility of recovery. Just right now your pain is so intense you can't see it. You've got to advocate for YOU. PLEASE do that Monday. And keep posting here. We care.
Marie> My name is Andrew, I've posted many times before.
> My doctor tells me I suffer from depression, and that I rationalize to myself by making the world out to be the disgusting, animalistic, evil place that it is.
> I've tried many med, I'm currently on Paxil 50mgs and Chlorodiazepoxide 20mgs T.I.D.: Its not working, I think I'm going psychotic. My mood will swing from the depths of hell to the heights of heaven, daily. I cant remember ANYTHING (I have real difficulty recalling yesterday). I'm getting so angry at everyone and everything, not my normal anger, but this absolute hatred of everything. I'm bored, I do nothing but drive around toronto for hours on end because nothing at all gives me any pleasure. I thrive on others misfortunes. And I am the most sarcastic individual you will ever meet. My friends however, see the opposite: they see a wonderfull sensitive caring person who thinks to much, Why is my perception of myself so distorted?
>
> Another new problem that has arrisen is money. For example, I have wanted this camera for years the Nikon f100, last week I spent 2500$ on it, only to return it for a refund today!?! My previous interest in photography is gone (interest in everything for that matter). I did the same with a new computer a few months ago, I got all excited, spent about two grand for it and got rogers@home internet. What did I do?
> I turned around and sold it in the paper!
> I feel like I am going insane. I have no hope I keep falling and falling and falling. I been to those useless institutions called hospitals, who get a textbook regurgitating crisis worker to tell you it will get better.
>
> I am going to kill myself soon. and it dosen't even upset me. Its like I have accepted this is the way life is. I'm so screwed up I don't even quite no how I feel, or If I'm happy or sad. How do I get myself admitted, do I have to shoot myself first, before they will pay any fucking attention to me?
>
> Question: If I am manic or hypomanic, would paxil be causing these wierd mood fluctuations?
>
> What if I just have a better insight into life than the rest, and I can see it for truly what it is: irrelevant, there is no meaning for our existence, we are just ants in anthills. How can anyone in there right mind believe in god? I tend to think religion is the sanctuary of the weak and ignorant.
>
> I am just rambling out all my thoughts in hopes that someone understands what it feels like, or can tell me "yes Andrew, you are fucking nuts"
> As I have said in past postings, I am deemed gifted, in the 99th percentile, I'm not bragging, I'm actually ashamed because I am a 26 year old highschool drop out
> loser. Are "genius" (so to speak) and insanity really connected?
> I want to run away sooooo bad, If any one out there is willing to admit me or refer me, I will drive ANYWHERE.
> I was going to go and hide out in the Rockies to relax, but of course that one never came to fruition.
> I sometimes think my work dosent help (actually I'm on a four month medical leave of abscense right now because it burnt me out) I work in a group home for abused children, and the occaisonal Autistic. I should be happy, although it is stressfull, it should be very fullfilling, it is to my co-workers.
> I can't listen to the radio anymore. It makes me sick, The stupid morning shows and all of these "manufactured" bands. I feel like everyone in the world has had the wool thrown over there eyes but me.
> Really, the world is a rotten place, full of greed, hatred, hunger, death, poverty, war, famine, drought.
> To have a positive attitude towards life is to be deceitfull to oneself.
>
> Love is nothing but neurons and seratonin which (hopefully) keep us alive long enough to procreate. When it fails or malfunctions, Suicide occurs.
>
> Thank you all for letting me vent
> sincerely
> Andrew.
Posted by Lini on September 9, 2001, at 9:23:07
In reply to Re: PLEASE, SOMONE HELP ME, I'M FALLING TO PIECES., posted by JohnL on September 9, 2001, at 6:28:20
>
hey there andrewalot of people are reaching out to your post, as painful as it was for me to read because of how much it reminded me of times i have felt that terrible, it was also really important for me to reflect on the fact that i was there and now i am not. i just want to share that with you, there is another side that you can reach, even though it feels like an absolute impossibility right now. i am not going to tell you that there is a miraculous pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, but there are moments of joy and love and peace (as Hallmark as that sounds) waiting for you in days to come. I spent a long time with passive thoughts of suicide - it wasn't that i wanted to kill myself, it was that i wouldn't have minded just dying. it way a terrible way to *live* and now that i am finaly dealing with my depression, i feel much more entitled and responsible to enjoy my unique life.
You say that you were working with abused children - is it possible that any of the heavy emotions associated with work are bringing up personal emotions for you? I don't know what your childhood was like, but alot of times we are subconsciously drawn to helping people deal with problems we haven't addressed on our own. as an abuse survivor, for a long time, that was my personal experience.
Andrew, there is alot of support for you, regardless of your situation, diagnosis, whatever. some people are going to suggest God, others the right med cocktail and here i am talking about childhood - my point is that there are people on this board who have lived through how you are feeling. while i am not a prozac poster child, i have gotten significantly "better" with meds and therapy. can you trust our (those on this board's) experiences enough to keep yourself alive? I hope so Andrew, all of us here are hoping you choose to stick around. most of us here have come up against that decision of whether or not to keep living and decided that it was worth it.
take care of you -
Posted by Squiggles on September 9, 2001, at 19:20:49
In reply to PLEASE, SOMONE HELP ME, I'M FALLING TO PIECES., posted by zarathustra on September 8, 2001, at 21:07:47
> My name is Andrew, I've posted many times before.
> My doctor tells me I suffer from depression, and that I rationalize to myself by making the world out to be the disgusting, animalistic, evil place that it is.
> I've tried many med, I'm currently on Paxil 50mgs and Chlorodiazepoxide 20mgs T.I.D.: Its not working, I think I'm going psychotic. My mood will swing from the depths of hell to the heights of heaven, daily. I cant remember ANYTHING (I have real difficulty recalling yesterday). I'm getting so angry at everyone and everything, not my normal anger, but this absolute hatred of everything. I'm bored, I do nothing but drive around toronto for hours on end because nothing at all gives me any pleasure. I thrive on others misfortunes. And I am the most sarcastic individual you will ever meet. My friends however, see the opposite: they see a wonderfull sensitive caring person who thinks to much, Why is my perception of myself so distorted?
>
> Another new problem that has arrisen is money. For example, I have wanted this camera for years the Nikon f100, last week I spent 2500$ on it, only to return it for a refund today!?! My previous interest in photography is gone (interest in everything for that matter). I did the same with a new computer a few months ago, I got all excited, spent about two grand for it and got rogers@home internet. What did I do?
> I turned around and sold it in the paper!
> I feel like I am going insane. I have no hope I keep falling and falling and falling. I been to those useless institutions called hospitals, who get a textbook regurgitating crisis worker to tell you it will get better.
>
> I am going to kill myself soon. and it dosen't even upset me. Its like I have accepted this is the way life is. I'm so screwed up I don't even quite no how I feel, or If I'm happy or sad. How do I get myself admitted, do I have to shoot myself first, before they will pay any fucking attention to me?
>
> Question: If I am manic or hypomanic, would paxil be causing these wierd mood fluctuations?
>
> What if I just have a better insight into life than the rest, and I can see it for truly what it is: irrelevant, there is no meaning for our existence, we are just ants in anthills. How can anyone in there right mind believe in god? I tend to think religion is the sanctuary of the weak and ignorant.
>
> I am just rambling out all my thoughts in hopes that someone understands what it feels like, or can tell me "yes Andrew, you are fucking nuts"
> As I have said in past postings, I am deemed gifted, in the 99th percentile, I'm not bragging, I'm actually ashamed because I am a 26 year old highschool drop out
> loser. Are "genius" (so to speak) and insanity really connected?
> I want to run away sooooo bad, If any one out there is willing to admit me or refer me, I will drive ANYWHERE.
> I was going to go and hide out in the Rockies to relax, but of course that one never came to fruition.
> I sometimes think my work dosent help (actually I'm on a four month medical leave of abscense right now because it burnt me out) I work in a group home for abused children, and the occaisonal Autistic. I should be happy, although it is stressfull, it should be very fullfilling, it is to my co-workers.
> I can't listen to the radio anymore. It makes me sick, The stupid morning shows and all of these "manufactured" bands. I feel like everyone in the world has had the wool thrown over there eyes but me.
> Really, the world is a rotten place, full of greed, hatred, hunger, death, poverty, war, famine, drought.
> To have a positive attitude towards life is to be deceitfull to oneself.
>
> Love is nothing but neurons and seratonin which (hopefully) keep us alive long enough to procreate. When it fails or malfunctions, Suicide occurs.
>
> Thank you all for letting me vent
> sincerely
> Andrew.If I understand your description correctly
Andrew, I would say that this is manic depression,
and your doctor should be able to pick this up.
If that is confirmed, lithium should make you
feel better very soon. There are other drugs
as well. Let me know of your progress.Squiggles
Posted by Nobody on September 27, 2003, at 0:00:44
In reply to Re: PLEASE, SOMONE HELP ME, I'M FALLING TO PIECES., posted by Squiggles on September 9, 2001, at 19:20:49
Hi Andrew,
I know nothing of medications or possible diagnosis of what psychologicalmalady you are afflicted by so I won’t presume to do so. I do however believe that those who are gifted have a very troublesome burden to bear. Living in a world where you think and perceive differently than most around you. A life where you feel the lack of having a true connection to others because the way they see life is dissimilar to your own. Also a life where everyone is two steps behind where you are mentally. You see the way things should be, how the world should work and more deeply into your surroundings. Going through life like this can be very frustrating and lead to despair. This has also lead many geniuses to produce their greatest works. How different would the world of art and music be without the melancholy artists, writers and composers who have left their mark on the world. I think maybe you could find having a creative outlet very therapeutic whatever it may be. Possibly joining a group such as mensa may give you a venue where you are surrounded by people who are also two steps ahead, so to speak.
As far as love being a chemical reaction, if that’s what you truly believe why not just enjoy the serotonin.
You also say the world is a rotten place full of greed, hatred, death, poverty, war, famine and drought. The world is also a place where complete strangers read your posting and take time out of their day to respond to it. A place where people give freely of themselves to those who are hungry, those who are hated, to those who are poor looking for nothing in return. To often we focus on what is wrong with the world and not on the bright spots that show us what is right with it. Just look at the nightly news, it’s one atrocity after another but what you don’t see is the good that was done that day. If religion is the sanctuary for the weak and ignorant why is it so difficult for people to follow the teachings of religions on how to treat one another. You believe the world to be a disgusting, animalistic and evil place because of how people interact. Most religions teach their followers to act in a diametrically opposite manner to this, which is far harder than to give into animalistic instinct. You can give many examples of how religion has caused some of the greatest cruelty in history. The religions were not the cause of such deeds, the religion was the excuse used by those in power to do such deeds and convince the uneducated to follow. If you read the tenants of most religions, some of which these deeds were done in the name of, you would see that the teachings of the religion would never call for such things to be done and would condemn such acts. Religion is the place for the weak...a place for them to become strong, spiritually strong. This strength gives them the ability to overcome animalistic instincts and desires. It also gives those who are weary of despair a place to rest.
I wish you the best of luck in overcoming your depression.
How do you know you are happy if you have never been sad?
How do you know what is good when you have never seen bad?Take Care Andrew,
nobody
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Medication | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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Script revised: February 4, 2008
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