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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 32 to 56 of 63. Go back in thread:
Posted by AdaGrace on November 21, 2004, at 6:52:46
In reply to Re: partlycloudy--- » AdaGrace, posted by partlycloudy on November 20, 2004, at 12:30:48
Please don't hate yourself.
I wish I was here yesterday more.
It's amazing to me how something so supportive can be very devestating hurtful at times.
Sometimes I just don't think some people realize the damage they do to our fragile self esteems.
Please think of me and all the things you said to me.....and then say them to yourself.
You are such a good person, and not worthy of self hate.
Thinking of you and trying to telepathically send you good thoughts about yourself.
Posted by Dr. Bob on November 21, 2004, at 7:13:12
In reply to Re: partlycloudy--- » partlycloudy, posted by KaraS on November 20, 2004, at 14:29:36
> different mental health problems can manifest in different ways. Sometimes they lead people to do things that cause pain to others.
I think general statements like that are OK...
> The posts that are brought up for "review" are not really the issue here. They are just excuses for getting attention.
But that's more specific, so keeping in mind that the idea here is not to jump to conclusions about others or to post anything that could lead others to feel accused or put down, could you please rephrase that?
If you or others have questions about this or about posting policies in general, or are interested in alternative ways of expressing yourself, please see the FAQ:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#civil
Follow-ups regarding these issues should be redirected to Psycho-Babble Administration. They, as well as replies to the above post, should of course themselves be civil.
Thanks,
Bob
Posted by gardenergirl on November 21, 2004, at 13:15:56
In reply to Re: please rephrase that » KaraS, posted by Dr. Bob on November 21, 2004, at 7:13:12
Hi,
I just wanted to say a couple things about how ignoring a behavior can make it go away eventually. In behavioral terms, that is true, and it's often a good way to deal with problem behaviors. But a note of caution... In the process, the behavior can, and often does increase for a time before it goes away. This is called an extinction burst. It can lead to frustration and to giving up the behavioral "plan" to ignore behavior because it seems like it isn't working. But if the ignoring or not reinforcing of a behavior continues, eventually the behavior does stop.Just thought I'd drop some theory in. I'll turn the lectern over to someone else now. :-)
gg
Posted by alexandra_k on November 21, 2004, at 13:20:19
In reply to Extinction of behavior, posted by gardenergirl on November 21, 2004, at 13:15:56
It would help if we moved to a FI-1 rather than intermittant schedule first - that way extinction occurs faster :-)
Posted by alexandra_k on November 21, 2004, at 13:20:54
In reply to Re: Extinction of behavior » gardenergirl, posted by alexandra_k on November 21, 2004, at 13:20:19
Posted by gardenergirl on November 21, 2004, at 13:39:54
In reply to Re: Extinction of behavior » gardenergirl, posted by alexandra_k on November 21, 2004, at 13:20:19
Speaking generally about extinction...yep, intermittent is the worst. It maintains behavior better than anything. You gotta be consistent.
gg
Posted by verne on November 21, 2004, at 14:12:46
In reply to OK Corral, posted by verne on November 21, 2004, at 3:29:03
This is what happens when you mix 20 milk thistle capsules and 16 beers.
I'm really feeling sheepish this morning and can bearly, not barely, understand last night's posts.
Off to the store to get some remedial beer. Can't go from 16 to 0 in a day.
verne
Posted by TofuEmmy on November 21, 2004, at 16:01:09
In reply to PuppetMaster » KaraS, posted by verne on November 21, 2004, at 2:20:04
Who else incites more discord and upset on this site? Why is it that there is seemingly ALWAYS something disruptive going here? Is it a coincidence?? Or not? Hmmmm....
It's just NEVER calm here. That's just plain wierd. Instead of doing something therapeutic which could calm things, he seems to poke us with a lab tool - aka new rule. It's his hobby - poking us. If I ran this site, I would have emailed the refrequent reporter and said, "Thank you, but I don't need your assistance. Cease and desist all reporting or you will be blocked for 3 months". Sorry, but despite good intentions, the reporter has not demonstrated appropriate sensitivity in this reporting, imho.
Bob - if you feel put down, I'm sorry. But it's like someone saying my butt is fat. It's an unfortunate truth, and a good reminder that I need to change my behavior.
em
Posted by KaraS on November 21, 2004, at 16:44:47
In reply to OK Corral, posted by verne on November 21, 2004, at 3:29:03
> My problem with this site is mostly with the "set", the enclosure. I like movies, and all and love to play pretend, but my frolic is interrupted when I'm cramped...
Hard to have it otherwise on an Internet site though.
> Here we have several "corrals" and rules about guests.I don't follow you about the rules about guests though there certainly are lots of rules in general.
Add to that a supreme being - don't worry it's still a western - add more supreme being - don't worry, it's still science-fiction.
>
> well, love.
>
> I can't express the love or hurt I feel. Just wishing, hoping. I'm not kidding or sarcastic.
>
> I called someone back on the Pacific Zone, back when, nice to touch base, hurts. I'm really just looking for a lost love.
>
> In alot of pain. It hurts so much.(((verne)))
Did you just contact that old girlfriend you mentioned in an earlier thread? Love can hurt too much. That's why I stay away from it. I'm much too vulnerable and chicken ____. Good for you for being brave and taking the risk though.
Despite all of the rules that cramp our styles, isn't it nice to be able to pour your heart out here and get support?
K
Posted by KaraS on November 21, 2004, at 16:51:14
In reply to Re: please rephrase that » KaraS, posted by Dr. Bob on November 21, 2004, at 7:13:12
> > different mental health problems can manifest in different ways. Sometimes they lead people to do things that cause pain to others.
>
> I think general statements like that are OK...
>
> > The posts that are brought up for "review" are not really the issue here. They are just excuses for getting attention.
>
> But that's more specific, so keeping in mind that the idea here is not to jump to conclusions about others or to post anything that could lead others to feel accused or put down, could you please rephrase that?
>
> If you or others have questions about this or about posting policies in general, or are interested in alternative ways of expressing yourself, please see the FAQ:
>
> http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#civil
>
> Follow-ups regarding these issues should be redirected to Psycho-Babble Administration. They, as well as replies to the above post, should of course themselves be civil.
>
> Thanks,
>
> BobDr. Bob,
I have thought about this a lot and I'm not sure I can rephrase those 2 sentences without losing the meaning entirely. I am open for suggestions though. Perhaps it is better if I just say let's strike them completely from the record.Kara
Posted by Dr. Bob on November 21, 2004, at 18:51:35
In reply to The Puppet Master is a troll....imho, posted by TofuEmmy on November 21, 2004, at 16:01:09
> If I ran this site, I would have emailed the refrequent reporter and said, "Thank you, but I don't need your assistance. Cease and desist all reporting or you will be blocked for 3 months".
I'd rather try to find a middle ground?
Bob
Posted by Dr. Bob on November 21, 2004, at 18:51:42
In reply to Re: please rephrase that » Dr. Bob, posted by KaraS on November 21, 2004, at 16:51:14
> > > different mental health problems can manifest in different ways. Sometimes they lead people to do things that cause pain to others.
> >
> > I think general statements like that are OK...
> >
> > > The posts that are brought up for "review" are not really the issue here. They are just excuses for getting attention.
>
> I have thought about this a lot and I'm not sure I can rephrase those 2 sentences without losing the meaning entirely. I am open for suggestions though. Perhaps it is better if I just say let's strike them completely from the record.We can strike them, but one suggestion might be to continue to be general, for example:
> > > Sometimes part of it may be that they don't want to be neglected.
Bob
Posted by verne on November 21, 2004, at 18:56:46
In reply to Re: OK Corral » verne, posted by KaraS on November 21, 2004, at 16:44:47
"K" was the main character in many Kafka stories. One of my favorite authors.
I called people I hadn't seen or heard from in years but I was in no shape to contact the former girlfriend. I'm too traumatized by the prospect. I'm in too much emotional pain right now.
I need to put the "reunion" in abeyance. I love the word "abeyance" - it's like an easy chair or comfortable sofa.
Meanwhile, I'm drinking for the second day but hope to keep it down to a reasonable level. I'm just hoping my liver doesn't spontaneously eject.
My show, "American Dreams" is coming on in a few minutes. It's a "soap opera" set in the 60's around American Bandstand. They started out in autumn 1963 and are now in 65 I think. My mother drank herself to death on the day JFK was murdered. I wonder how many people went off the edge that day.
V
Posted by TofuEmmy on November 21, 2004, at 19:00:59
In reply to Re: suggestion, posted by Dr. Bob on November 21, 2004, at 18:51:42
Bob - But this has allowed ONE person to cause MONTHS of upheaval on this site. Does that really make sense to you? A simple personal request from you outlining your reasoning, and consequences for continued disruption just seems fairer to the majority who post here.
Thank you for letting me express this.
em
Posted by Lou Pilder on November 21, 2004, at 19:37:26
In reply to Re: suggestion, posted by TofuEmmy on November 21, 2004, at 19:00:59
Dr. Hsiung,
I am requesting that you ask the poster to identify the person that they are referring to as [...this ONE person to cause MONTHS of upheaval...] or for you to identify the poster referred to as to how you interprett this thread. If you could have the poster in question identified, then I could have the opportunity to respond accordingly.
Lou Pilder
Posted by verne on November 21, 2004, at 20:21:04
In reply to To Dr. Hsiung, posted by Lou Pilder on November 21, 2004, at 19:37:26
Posted by TofuEmmy on November 21, 2004, at 20:55:34
In reply to To Dr. Hsiung, posted by Lou Pilder on November 21, 2004, at 19:37:26
Lou - I'm talking about my friend GardenerGirl. She is VERY disruptive!!! Thank you for asking.
emmy
Posted by gardenergirl on November 21, 2004, at 21:00:42
In reply to Re: To Dr. Hsiung » Lou Pilder, posted by TofuEmmy on November 21, 2004, at 20:55:34
Posted by TofuEmmy on November 21, 2004, at 21:04:22
In reply to I resemble that remark! (nm) » TofuEmmy, posted by gardenergirl on November 21, 2004, at 21:00:42
I SINCERELY apologize if I hurt your feeling, my beloved GG!! You know how much your friendship means to me!! (I was hoping to get at least one more pic of your gorgeous hubbie b4 we go our separate ways....)
But someone had to stop you!!! :-)
Love you!!
Kisses, TofuButt
Posted by gardenergirl on November 21, 2004, at 21:05:38
In reply to Re: I resemble that remark! » gardenergirl, posted by TofuEmmy on November 21, 2004, at 21:04:22
Apology accepted, but how in the heck to you kiss your tofubutt?
Are you a yogi?
gg
Posted by gardenergirl on November 21, 2004, at 21:07:11
In reply to Re: I resemble that remark! » TofuEmmy, posted by gardenergirl on November 21, 2004, at 21:05:38
> Apology accepted, but how in the heck to you kiss your tofubutt?
>
> Are you a yogi?
>
> ggNow look what you made me do. It was supposed to say, "how in the heck DO YOU kiss your tofubutt?"
Posted by Glydin on November 21, 2004, at 22:45:18
In reply to Extinction of behavior, posted by gardenergirl on November 21, 2004, at 13:15:56
But if the ignoring or not reinforcing of a behavior continues, eventually the behavior does stop.
~~~I did try this once with a bullying situation, it did become successful when they were sent to prison----(true)
Posted by verne on November 21, 2004, at 23:40:57
In reply to Re: I resemble that remark! » gardenergirl, posted by TofuEmmy on November 21, 2004, at 21:04:22
I love what you're doing.
verne
Posted by saw on November 22, 2004, at 1:38:03
In reply to Re: partlycloudy--- » AdaGrace, posted by partlycloudy on November 20, 2004, at 12:30:48
<<i hate myself>>
I am just so sad, so sad by that. You didn't deserve this. You were, and still are, doing so well.
I don't hate you.
S
PS. When I told B I had a friend who lives in America, where the hurricanes happened, he asked if he could get on the plane to give you a hug. (He DOESN'T hug people he does not know).
Posted by AuntieMel on November 22, 2004, at 10:07:21
In reply to Andromeda, posted by verne on November 21, 2004, at 4:13:57
Soylent green.
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