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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 2 to 26 of 65. Go back in thread:
Posted by gardenergirl on March 3, 2008, at 9:45:42
In reply to I am resigning as deputy, posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 9:22:57
This is a tremendous loss to the Babble community. I'm sure you thought long and hard about this decision. I know it's one that comes with some upset. Take care of dinah. She's very special.
gg
Posted by Justherself54 on March 3, 2008, at 10:04:31
In reply to Re: I am resigning as deputy » Dinah, posted by gardenergirl on March 3, 2008, at 9:45:42
You will be sorely missed Dinah, but I also know you must have given this a great deal of thought and probably agonized over the decision. You are a true asset to this community..I'll see you in chat!
Posted by Phoenix1 on March 3, 2008, at 10:46:47
In reply to I am resigning as deputy, posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 9:22:57
Bob, would you be able to clarify the changes Dinah refers too?
Posted by Phoenix1 on March 3, 2008, at 10:55:46
In reply to I am resigning as deputy, posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 9:22:57
Dinah, you were always one of the best deputies! And your non-deputy post showed so much knowledge and empathy. I will miss you!
Phoenix1
> Due to some changes that Dr. Bob is making, I no longer feel like I can in all due conscience be a deputy.
>
> Under those same changes, I no longer feel safe myself to post either as a deputy or a former deputy. If anything changes in that regard, and I can post as a former deputy, I'd be delighted to return. I'll miss you guys.
>
> I can still babblemail and chat. And wherever I am, I'll be Dinah.
Posted by ClearSkies on March 3, 2008, at 11:54:28
In reply to I am resigning as deputy, posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 9:22:57
Dinah, your wisdom and patience as a deputy will be mourned by many.
ClearSkies
Posted by Phillipa on March 3, 2008, at 12:40:56
In reply to Re: I am resigning as deputy » Dinah, posted by ClearSkies on March 3, 2008, at 11:54:28
Oh Dinah don't go. You are a great person. Love Phillipa
Posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 13:19:30
In reply to I am resigning as deputy, posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 9:22:57
To be absolutely clear, and fair to the remaining deputies, I am saying that because of my life experiences and history it is impossible for me to remain as a deputy. Not that it is unconscionable, of course.
I have so much respect for the remaining deputies. It's been a pleasure and honor to work with them. I consider them friends. I realized afterwards that my post may imply that I don't hold the remaining deputies in the highest esteem. I do. My esteem for my fellow deputies was never in any doubt at all.
I tried to resign as deputy, and remain as poster, but an ex-deputy is the same as a deputy to Dr. Bob. I could have said nothing and just disappeared, but I don't want it to seem like I want to leave Babble or don't care about the posters here very much. You guys have been my friends, my family of a sort, and a strong leg in my support stool. The worst part of this is losing that. I tried, but didn't succeed, in working things out in such a way that I felt I could stay.
Posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 13:24:11
In reply to Bob, can you clarify please, posted by Phoenix1 on March 3, 2008, at 10:46:47
I suspect that when he explains, it wouldn't sound at all like how I would explain. Perhaps he'll allow me a civil rebuttal, framed in how it would affect me as a deputy, or ex-deputy.
I don't think the majority of Babblers need to worry about it. I think the majority of Babblers will turn cartwheels, and in fact many that have left may well return.
Posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 13:26:13
In reply to Re: Bob, can you clarify please » Phoenix1, posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 13:24:11
Ok, now I do wish they had a delete button. I think I've departed from the high road, and I really regret that. I take full responsibility for posting while distressed. It won't happen again.
Posted by ClearSkies on March 3, 2008, at 14:24:13
In reply to Re: I am resigning as deputy, posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 13:19:30
Dinah, I hope that you find a way to continue to post here just as wonderful Dinah, and be able to leave your deputy hat behind. I really would hate to see you go.
CS
Posted by Kath on March 3, 2008, at 14:43:20
In reply to Dinah, posted by ClearSkies on March 3, 2008, at 14:24:13
I am feeling distraught.
How selfish of me.
I canNOT imagine PB without Dinah! So There.
(((((((((((((((you)))))))))))))
I don't know what requirements Dr. Bob HAS of a former deputy.
I don't understand that part.many hugs, Kath
PS - I hope things will be made clear & that you'll find you feel safe posting as simply Dinah (who was once a deputy)
Posted by Toph on March 3, 2008, at 16:45:27
In reply to I am resigning as deputy, posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 9:22:57
Hey, whatever happened to the custom that the Captain goes down with the ship? I can easily picture a Babble without Deputy Dinah, but I can't imagine a Babble with no Dinah at all. You were always adept at disarming my righteous indignation. Surely the world could use more leaders with disarming skills. Isn't it our issue if we take a while getting used to you without your deputy hat on? But if you need a break, take one, you're entitled. You may want to come back with a new name just to feel the freedom of anonymity for a while. See if someone recognizes you. Then change back to Dinah and you'll be surprised how welcoming we can be.
Posted by obsidian on March 3, 2008, at 17:31:45
In reply to I am resigning as deputy, posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 9:22:57
> Due to some changes that Dr. Bob is making, I no longer feel like I can in all due conscience be a deputy.
>
> Under those same changes, I no longer feel safe myself to post either as a deputy or a former deputy. If anything changes in that regard, and I can post as a former deputy, I'd be delighted to return. I'll miss you guys.
>
> I can still babblemail and chat. And wherever I am, I'll be Dinah.I will feel sad about that Dinah :-(
but I hope it is because you are trying to take good care of yourself
Be well and content
-obsidian
Posted by AbbieNormal on March 3, 2008, at 18:34:51
In reply to I am resigning as deputy, posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 9:22:57
You've offered yards of patience and billowing grace to the masses. Bob has never deserved you.
I hope this is sorted out in whatever way allows you to keep posting as Dinah.
Abbie
Posted by rskontos on March 3, 2008, at 19:24:16
In reply to Re: I am resigning as deputy » Dinah, posted by AbbieNormal on March 3, 2008, at 18:34:51
Dinah, I hope that you are resigning due to a desire to take care of yourself and not because Dr. Bob is doing something you feel you can't be a part of :(
Or that if you tried to resign as a deputy and the stipulations put in place where just to hard then I understand. All in all, this is a little confusing so I hope you know who that (think Dr. Bob) shall jump in and clear this up. I don't want to put Dinah in yet another uncomfortable place of explaining when she extrapolated herself already.
Dinah you will be missed as a deputy. I noticed your posting was down. Does anyone understand better than I, does this mean Dinah will be gone from Babble for good. I hate to ask her to repeat if I misunderstood. I seem to be dense these days. Things have been a little rough for me these past 3 or 4 days and denseness has settled in.
Any case, Dinah you will be missed.
rsk
ps. Dinah if you are reading this, I only asked the way I did so that you don't feel compelled to answer. You can wait and let someone else clear up my foggy brain.
Posted by KAL44 on March 3, 2008, at 19:30:46
In reply to Re: I am resigning as deputy, posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 13:19:30
That seems strange to me that an ex-deputy would be treated the same as if they were still a deputy. Of course I have no idea how a deputy is treated by Dr. Bob, and so what do I know. It just sounds odd to me.
Posted by KAL44 on March 3, 2008, at 19:32:30
In reply to Re: I am resigning as deputy » Dinah, posted by KAL44 on March 3, 2008, at 19:30:46
I meant to add that I don't understand why Dr. Bob would treat an ex-deputy as if that person was still a deputy. I don't understand I guess.
Posted by TherapyGirl on March 3, 2008, at 20:25:34
In reply to I am resigning as deputy, posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 9:22:57
I, as usual, have no idea what's going on, but I will say this: I have not only enjoyed but have benefited immensely from all your posts -- deputy and non-deputy. You are so open-minded and diplomatic. Any change to the policies around here that would take you from us is just wrong.
Posted by obsidian on March 3, 2008, at 20:55:16
In reply to Re: Bob, can you clarify please » Phoenix1, posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 13:24:11
> I don't think the majority of Babblers need to worry about it. I think the majority of Babblers will turn cartwheels, and in fact many that have left may well return.
no cartwheel here...
these people to whom you refer (if they exist) are so lacking in good judgment that I would not waste my time paying attention to them, except perhaps to trip them as they cartwheeled
Posted by AbbieNormal on March 3, 2008, at 21:13:28
In reply to Re: I am resigning as deputy » KAL44, posted by KAL44 on March 3, 2008, at 19:32:30
> I meant to add that I don't understand why Dr. Bob would treat an ex-deputy as if that person was still a deputy.
Perhaps because he doesn't like losing control?
Posted by Sigismund on March 3, 2008, at 21:25:49
In reply to Re: Bob, can you clarify please » Phoenix1, posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 13:24:11
>I don't think the majority of Babblers need to worry about it. I think the majority of Babblers will turn cartwheels, and in fact many that have left may well return.
I feel sure that's not so.
What you have given to this community has been deeply appreciated.
Of course there have been disagreements.
Posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 21:57:09
In reply to Re: I am resigning as deputy, posted by AbbieNormal on March 3, 2008, at 21:13:28
I'm sorry. Posting this without being able to explain it has led to more confusion than I would have liked. I didn't wish for that when I posted it. I wanted to stop an ongoing conversation with Dr. Bob that was hurting me, and that I had no reason to believe would end any differently than usual. But my feelings are different than usual this time.
Being a deputy means a lot of forks in the road. At lots of times, you have to as a deputy decide if this hill or that hill is worth dying on. Whether you are willing to accept something or quit being a deputy. Or as I more inelegantly put it, you have to swallow whatever Dr. Bob serves you, or leave.
I made it clear that he was asking something of me that was my hill. That was too large for me to swallow. My understanding of his answer, and I've restated it plenty of times so that I made sure he understood what I was hearing him to say, was that resigning made no difference. That whether or not I resigned, this change of policy would affect me the same way. I had to swallow it whether I remained a deputy or not. I would not be treated as a poster who had never been a deputy in this matter.
I understand that he would not frame it in this way. I understand that he may see this as my decision, not a decision that was forced on me. He even may think I'm being intransigent and stubborn or trying to exert my will. I understand that he may see it that way. I see it as having no choice.
At first, since it didn't matter whether or not I resigned, I was just going to quit posting and reading and remain a deputy, to keep the only possible ties I have to a community I love. But I found it was bringing me too much pain for me to tolerate. That's not Dr. Bob's fault. But it's true.
There might well be a lot of debate with a lot of good ideas on each side whether the change in policy is a good thing or a bad thing. It was the change of policy I was referring to as being something a lot of people would be thrilled about. Not my quitting as deputy. Although I'd be foolish to think that my quitting met with universal feelings of distress, I know that posters have generally been kind to me in this role and out of it. And my decision has nothing whatsoever to do with any posters at all. I love Babble and I love Babble posters. It is solely an issue of Dr. Bob not leaving me any choice that I could see.
I'm not saying that Dr. Bob is a bad guy. I'm not even positive I'm angry with him. I might be. I think he's doing what he thinks is best for the community, whether or not I agree.
It's definitely not good at all for me.
And in those situations, it's the poster who has to give. It's always been that way and it always will be, because Dr. Bob is the boss. In a way posters come to that fork in the road all the time too. As we do in everything in life, I guess.
I'm not going to pretend that I'm leaving to pursue other interests, or that I'm leaving because I want to. That wouldn't be fair to the relationship I've always had with Babble.
I don't know if this makes any more sense than what I said before. But I'm afraid I caused more distress than I wished and more confusion than I'd ever want to cause. I just wanted everyone to understand that this has absolutely nothing to do with Babble posters, just with Dr. Bob. And that I'm not hysterical or overly upset. I haven't even cried since this morning. I'm just sad.
Posted by Phillipa on March 3, 2008, at 22:07:14
In reply to Re: I am resigning as deputy, posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 21:57:09
Dinah I understand. I really do. Love Phillipa
Posted by annierose on March 3, 2008, at 22:14:18
In reply to Re: I am resigning as deputy, posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 21:57:09
I am so sadden by this news.
Babble just won't be the same without you on board.
I hope this resolves itself soon and Dr. Bob helps the process of healing.
Posted by karen_kay on March 4, 2008, at 9:44:03
In reply to I am resigning as deputy, posted by Dinah on March 3, 2008, at 9:22:57
did i miss something? ((((dinah))))) i'm clueless as to what's going on dear, but i wish you the best of luck in your choices hun. and you know how much respect i have for you. if your final decision is to withdrawl as a deputy, you will be dearly missed!!!!
((((((dinah))))))
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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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